+ stress and what not to do

Sooo today I babysitted them monsters and it caused me some emotional stress. Seriously big shout out to everyone that got kids who are in their puberty or the teachers dealing with them. I admire you for I could not u.u

Anyway them monsters were annoying to hell during the car ride with singing "yes yes yes, no no no" and the baby shark song. Then they went ahead to hit one another and neither one did want to give in or stop. Like seriously, grrrrrr. 

We went to see a castle. Sooo yay, I felt like a princess *^* . But did the monster behave? No. They run around screaming and annoying people. Everyone was starring. But since at that point their parents were still with us I stayed silent. For the most part. 

Then afterwards they fought about whether we would take a boat or play mini-golf. "I want this." "No you always get to decide." "We always have to do what you say, never what I say." "If we don't do this, I am going home." Stomp, stomp, stomp. Followed by some hitting. Like eue. Big fat EUE.

Then we went to have ice cream "why is hers bigger than minen?!" "It's not bigger." "Yes it is.""I got no strawberry." "I got no cookie." The fact that one of them got an after-eight ice cream cup and the other a spaghetti-ice did not seem to matter to them. 

And then they came over to us, because they wanna sleep-over. Cool story bro. Cool story. Now we were out and about the whole day, it was warm, we all did sweat. And what happens when you sweat? You get stinky. Especially when you are in puberty. So I told em to shower. They refused and once again started to make a scene. Big scene. Threw a tantrum with foot stomping and pencil-case throwing and all. I was boiling! "I am not gonna shower." "I don't stink. You do" "saying I stink is an insult." "You can't order me around, you are not my boss." 

We settled it. Because, yes, I am the boss in my home u.u

BUT we had another discussion because they did not want to brush their teeth. Like grrrrrrrrr. Everything,  literally everything is a reason for them to think they should throw a tantrum. It's sooo annoying. I am annoyed. So annoyed I can't sleep and be grrrrrrr. 

And of course what do I do when I feel emotionally stressed? I scratch. My ears are all bloody , my back is open and I scratched literal holes into my thighs. *sighs* I put ointment on it now and disinfected it all but yeah. I massacred myself. Pretty much. I . I really feel disappointed in myself for hurting myself in that way. But I couldn't stop scratching. I simply couldn't. It's like a inner urge and it starts to itch and it gets worse and worse the more you ignore it. It starts to burn and like bugs crawling beneath your skin, slowly driving you insane. It's horrible. 

Well just had to get this out there. Probably delete this later because I am so embarrassed bout it all, but yeah :/