rantrantrantrant

so as you can see by the title, this is just a bunch of me ranting. basically pointless to all of your lives so you really don't have to read this. I just have to say it somewhere.

Because I can't talk about people I know on a site where they will see it DUH. Like my mother for example. I swear to god I am going to suffocate int his house. no matter what I do, she is so focused on it that it'slike I did something wrong. JFC WOMAN I CAN WEAR A SPORTS BRA IF I WANT TO. YOU HAVE NO REASON TO POKE MY S BECAUSE THEY LOOK DIFFERENT TODAY. OR EVERY DAY FOR THAT MATTER. I really think that I am going to move out after this year. but since my plans keep changing because I can't pick a damn university to transfer to, I can't really go anywhere at the moment. Speaking of college. there is this guy, and he dated a girl from my class in high school. and let me just tell you, he is like 4-5 years older if not more. Now. this girl, we are going to call her the stick , breaks up with him. Now he has permanently latched onto me and won't stop following me and texting me about what times I have class so he can take me to sushi. I would love to go to sushi, but not with him. (but the thought of free food is quite tempting) especially now that I can't walk straight because I'm dizzy almost all the time. Food helps sometimes because I get low blood sugar easilly and then I'm shaky, uncoordinated AND dizzy. Not a good combonation, trust me. Another thing. Church. I have been ered into going almost every sunday morning and night because I can play guitar and bass. and since I live under my parent's roof and would have nowhere else to go if I were kicked out, I can't just tell them I'm not religious. that's like asking to be disowned. along those same lines, I can't tell my family I'm not straight. I mean, I tried to tell my mom but she laughed at me and told me I should find help. WTF MOM. YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO ACCEPT ME. and then I was with my grandma and mom and they started having a conversationa bout how gays should not be allowed anything because they are taking away all of the quote-on-quote 'healthy people's rights'. which is bull. so that leaves me with the conclusion that again, I need to get out of here. pronto. there is nothing that would make me more happy than to move to eugene right now (since my current plan is to go to UofO becauseyoupeopleknowwhatthatisright) even if I have to be around stick . it's a big campus, I can avoid her...I hope.

well that's all for right now. I really need sleep, the screen is movig around in my vision because I can't see straight.