FRIENDZONE.

when i finally got out of the hell-hole/coughs/hospital yesterday, there were two people i extremely wanted to talk to and i freakin' missed them.

so, hello, alex and sherry♥

these guys are the most important people in my life.

they helped me get through when i was brokenhearted. I HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO SAY. I JUST.. CAN'T. YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU GUYS.

okay, so last night. i've been talking to someone really really special to me. as usual, we laugh and talk about those kind of stuff that me and him only understands. i'm happy that he told me he's fine.. but since i know him too well, ugh, how should i say this? uhm.. i didn't miss the fact the he is.. lonely and stressed lately. when he talks to me, he's not that happy and energetic anymore. i mean, who would be happy and energetic if you have problems, right? i knew what's wrong so i tried to cheer him up by teasing his 'ugly sobs'. my other bestfriend, Sherry always makes fun of his 'ugly sobs' CAUSE WE CAN. HAHAHAHAHA. anyway, when he got pissed, i was like." HAHAHAHA YOU'RE SO CUTE I WANNA KISS YOU RIGHT NOW! "

what rocked me to my senses was.. his answer:

and then.. i was like..

i asked him if he was serious and he said yes.. so without any second thoughts or hesitation,

I KISSED HIM. (cause that was a goddamn one in a million opportunity)

the feeling was..

AWESOME. I CAN'T EXPLAIN. I MEAN WHEN HE STARTED TO KISS ME BACK, I SWEAR TO GOD THAT WAS THE MOST.. ASDFGHJKL FEELING EVER.

why is it so nice to kiss you? ugh, your lips. so damn soft and it fits on my lips too. HAHAHAHAHA. (oh my imaginations. -.-")

AND I HAVE TO SAY,

but then again..

i know he won't love me back more than i want him to.

i know he just loves me as a noona. and that will never change. 

and i better choose our friendship than to be in a relationship with you (which i know will never happen) cause i know that being friends with you, will make you stay longer.

SO I HOPE THIS DOESN'T CHANGE A THING. YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU FOREVER.

DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A CONFESSION?! O__O /is secretly praying it is not; SLAPPED AND HIDES IN MY HOLE

and one last thing, i'm seriously confused with my feelings. :'(

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMOOr7GEkj8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMOOr7GEkj8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMOOr7GEkj8