I have been supressing my emotions on the subject for the past two months.....honestly I can hold back my tears....lately I have been under some stress because I got into a physical altercation with my dad last month......no I am no longer under his care and nor do I want it.....The person I needed the most, the one who I turn to the most is not here......call me a for what I said earlier....I know he would hate to see it....but its there...its out in the open...some of you might hate and unfriend me, but im just being honest......I simply asked on thing......dont make any changes.....well you could have made minor changes......but the account isnt his anymore.....I understand that.....its just seeing the name change and knowing that he will never be there....it hurts.....its like a stab to my memory.....if you really want to know who I am writing this blog about dont let anyone ask me....I want you to do it...because you already know if you are gonna blog what u did......I never said for you to change it back...I am just upset at what I saw and I vented at it.....this is what I call pent up emotions......after dealing with all I have to I guess tht just killed me....and so did the blog...but hey...I cant blame all of what I said and am saying and will say on my emotions........so in saying this what it all comes down to is.....sorry if I hurt you.....if robert never told you, I have a very low tolerance, like most people here know......it took a lot of unfriending and refriending each other for us to finally become the friends that we were.....Icant listen to some songs because everytime I do I wanna break something out of anger that he isnt here, I cant think of certain artist without wanting to hurt someone....(yes call me crazy, I have serious anger issues people when are we gonna learn...)...anyways where was I, oh right, robert was like an older brother to me, though he called me umma.....Just seeing those changes really hurt so badly.....sorry if I offended you.....you really are a sweet girl steph.....Dont let what people say affect you like tht, yes I say dumb stupid , but giving up against me only makes me lose respect for u......Show me tht what I say to u just rolls off your back like water does off a duck.....you are only as strong as you set yourself to be against an opponent.....that was one thing I admired about robert......if I offened him he came back at me twice as hard, which is why I always respected him, not just as a friend but also as a person.......I'm not saying I dont have any respect for u.....I do....and im not saying tht you cannot replace him, which no body can do, im just saying dont take everything I say to heart like tht.....I know when im wrong, and I was.....I should have came to u in private.....but im apologizing now in front of my 230somethingish friends (or to the ones who actually read my blogs) I apologize.......
and also, two wrongs dont make a write.....if you thought the blog was about you then you should have came to me personally instead of writing a blog about it, which is what I should have done in the first place.......
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