Volunteers to read my one-shot before I publish it?

http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/742234/galaxy-of-solitude-angst-drama-romance-exo-ooc-kris

Galaxy Of Solitude

I craved her and desired her sweet tender touches against my own lips.

Yet I only saw her in my dreams feeling the curve of her wine glass waist and filling her till she says she loves me.

But I was awaken to face reality and everyday was a temptaion as I spent it with her but I could never touch her.

If I would just prick her skin, she would be shattered and forever lost in a galaxy of solitude.

Everyone around me was the devil pulling us apart and I know why.

This heart could never love her forever.

Yet...

She was my heroine.

And yet...

my heart wouldn't let her in.

I rather die and yet I'm going to anyway.

"I can't love you forever "

"You betrayed me."

I could still see her sunkiss smile as she walked by delivering her words to someone other than me.

I had to accept that her world could never be my world.

The only thing that I ever wanted...I will never have

This is my first and new one shot as fanficotaku on asianfanfics.com

Also I am the author of Cigars On Ice & Exotic Nights

It contains ,angst, drama and it's sad but beautiful as well in my opinion.

I want/need someone to read it to tell me their opinions so I can feel confident or fix something that may seem out of place.

Any takers? Ha, please?

I will send an invite to those who will read it, so no one else can see it till they comment below :p

You can request anything from me but Karma points XD

Also if anyone doesn't have any use for their karma points on AFF, can you gift them to me XD Sorry, I'm desperate to advertise my story on there and it's hard since most people can buy their points. I can't XD You don't have to if you don't want too.