wake up kai, it's not going to happen!

So, I woke up this morning, crying.. Why? Because I didn't want to wake up from my dream, I wanted to stay asleep forever..
The reason to all of this is... *sighs* In every dream I meet my boyfriend, but every time it ends I see him crying and saying weakly, "I love you.. Don't hate me for leaving like this.." It hurts to wake up and remember this one part, he's moving this monday and I can't let the thought go.. I love him so much and I don't want him to leave, I just want to go to the airport and bring him home to me just to make sure that he won't leave me. I know that sounds creepy but that's how scared I am..

He's moving to Thailand, exactly 212,04 miles (american) will turn into 5316.674 miles in not even 2 days.. Do you know how scary that is?
What if he finds someone who he falls for there? What if he'll leave me here hanging and forget about me? I'm terrified, I really am...

Is this normal? Why can't I just smile and be happy for him? I can't let him know about this, I just can't...

The title is what it is because I will never be able to meet him, ever.. I've never met him before either but still....
I want to go to sleep and never wake up again so I can live without all of these problems, I don't want to hide it from his friends and family, I love him and I want to let people know that I do, but that's never going to happen...