NOT IN THE MOOD
SERIOUSLY
EVERYTIME I TALK TO AN IRL'S INTERNET FRIEND GROUP, THEY ALWAYS MAKE ME FEEL WORTHLESS AND SUICIDAL
I'M DONE WITH THIS
WHERE THE HELL DO THEY GO TO FIND PEOPLE LIKE THIS
EVERYONE I TALK TO ONLINE IS A DOUCHE IN APPEARANCE BUT A DEEP PERSON ON THE INSIDE
HOW THE HELL DO ALL OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS FIND SEEMINGLY NICE PEOPLE WHO DOUCHE OUT ON STRANGERS
or maybe it's just me.
people usually stop putting up with me after a while because i'm such a messed up
i need therapy really
but really i'm actually a terrible friend
i shouldn't talk to people.
hopefully if i ever grow up i learn and just do business
find someone that's as trash as i am to take me so they never leave me
honestly
i don't deserve anything
i'm selfish and ignorant
i'm aware of things
but i don't understand them
in my mind there's always another plausible reason why something's there
like why is that man murdering his wife
i'd probably think it was because she was being a and think
ehh she deserved it
while everyone looks at me in horror because i didn't help her
ugh
i really need help
really bad
like
i seriously feel like my life
is the "what if i never met ___" story of a fairy tale
but lol i never talk to people so w/e
no one is ever good enough for me
i'm never good enough for anyone
It's a pain in the too
because the second i get close to someone
i become a total douche to them
because i have no idea how to handle friendship
lol you see it prominently in my rping too
because if you realize, i never have friends
just someone to snuggle with
and make me feel warm and snuggly inside
, i should really be doing my homework
not moping around like this
but w/e
being a isn't an excuse for not finishing my homework
ing school system though
I'm really worrying more about homework than my wellbeing 90% of the time
but that's really what it takes to be a good leader
so i don't blame them too much
even though it ends up in depression
w/e
anything to make the majority feel happy
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