Private review needed and anyone playing Line Fruit Monsters?

So, I want to revise two stories of mine. Two Men, One Case is a crime story featuring WonHyuk and a few other SuJu members. It contains , so I would need someone that can take reading such a scene. Shiver is a fantasy/ghost story featuring SiChul. So is there anyone that could give me a private review for those two? My writing skills improved a lot but these two stories just kind of . I don't get why they have so many subscribers xD

Aaand, is there anyone that is playing Fruit Monsters on Line Play? I need friends to get to the next stage;;