Disappearing act.....

so yea sorry for not answering everyone

and sory for my kakao talk friends

pikas been down a bit.... a bit much... a lot still

even though ppl tell me to get over it ... its still hard.. lifes hard

i use rpr to escape from life but even thats effecting me at this point

so if i dont answer you right away like i normally do im sorry

i have hw

i have school work

im in school

im depressed

so yea....

ive even thought about disappearing in general... and some other darker thoughts have crossed my mind

im going to a therapist on campus atm to help get my mind in order

so many violent thoughts crossing my head.. so many sucidal thoughts cross my mind... so many things have just come across my thought process

i have the weapons, i have the skills, i could easily hurt someone or even myself... (martial arts expert)

and i just realized i could really do it.... i lack remorse and guilt (says my therapist)

so yea.... yea.... *sighs*

so yea im busy

ill answer when i can

and dont forget to answer me (but you probably will forget *shrugs*... so *sighs)

where did my spark go....