basic information

me at a glance.

Date of Birth: february 12.

Age: 29.

Place of Birth: seoul, sk.

Current Location: seoul, sk.

MBTI: isfj.

Occupation: bartender.

Relationship Status: married.

history

or how i rose from the ashes.

i was born in a fallout shelter in seoul, and raised crammed in a concrete bunker with three other families. i don't remember those first few years, not well anyway, but i still startle at high-pitched noises like those of the emergency sirens. they say those things were going off everyday for the first few years, and no one understood why. what i do remember is that i was six when my mother passed away, and eight when my father left the bunker and never returned. the ahjumma with us said he probably fell to thieves, but i've never been certain. it wasn't until i was ten that we were able to leave that concrete hell hole.

one of the families we were trapped with took my younger sister and i in. but they had two children of their own, so we traded a lightless concrete cell for a slightly better lit hole at ground level. it wasn't really safe to leave when we did, but when you're ten you can't exactly argue with adults about the shadows that pass by at night, or the weird whistling sounds—at best they tell you you're hearing things. at worst, someone dies. things have been at their worst for a long time.

i was fourteen, and my sister, jiyeon, was thirteen when the treaty was finally signed. the damage was already done by then. the two of us did what we had to in order to scrape by. she begged on the streets, and i did a few things i'm not exactly proud of—stealing bread, or rice, was often the best case scenario some nights. for a while i ran with a few other delinquents, kids that had fallen through the cracks in the aftermath of the war. i couldn't get a real job until i was sixteen, and even then it was just sweeping floors and bussing tables for whatever business owner could afford a gawky teenage lackey. at eighteen i started working at feel, and that's where i've stayed.

jiyeon married some punk the .next year, and he got her knocked up shortly thereafter. if i ever find out where he is i'll wring his damn neck. she died in childbirth, like every other woman that's tried to have a baby since the disaster. it's some kind of complication due to the radiation, or so they say. that punk better hope i never find him, or else it won't be the radiation poisoning that ends up killing him.

the past ten years have all been pretty much the same. i work nights at the bar, i deal with that crooner and his so-called personality. he's the closest thing i've got to a friend, sad to say. someday i'll end up dead, but until then someone has to help the drunks self-medicate.

personality

what passes for one these days.

i do what i have to for survival, and sometimes that isn't pretty. actually, most of the time it isn't pretty. you hear you have an attractive face one too many times and that starts to get to you. it helped when i was younger, and had my sister to take care of, but it's also why i can't stand being touched sometimes. i get fraked out. it's worse than the loud, shrill noises, or that phantom feeling of being watched at all times. small spaces make my skin crawl, too, and if i'm in one long enough i start to panic and i can't breathe. when i do freak out, i usually latch on to whoever and whatever is closest. one too many times it's been that singer, hyungsoo, but he doesn't say much about it. most of the time.

i won't leave the people i care about in need, even if that means i have less food, less money, or one less blanket for the cold. these days it's less about what you have, and a lot more about what you don't have, and i've always believed the only reason you should look at what your friends or family have is to make sure they have enough, not to envy what they have and you don't. it's probably because i was raised in that concrete-lined grave, but i know you're supposed to take care of the people you love. otherwise, what the hell does love even mean?

my husband

best friends forever.

01.22 i've said a lot of things about him, but nothing has ever been more fitting than calling him my husband. in less than a week I'll be his new bride, and not just because it's a way to get around these stupid rules and regulations anymore, but because I genuinely love this man. we used to say that neither of us could see the other saying "i love you," but now it's every other word we say to each other. i can't help but think he could have found a much better lover—hell, he could have found someone who would make him feel the way he deserves to feel every day. instead, he's got me. i want to say he probably did something to deserve it, but instead, maybe once i did something halfway decent in my past to earn his love and affection. whatever it is, i'm his and he's mine, and i can't imagine anyone i would rather marry, make love to, or raise a family with. we're a family, kim hyungsoo, and all this that scares me half-to-death, the stuff no one else is willing to think about, but i see when i close my eyes, i can take that stuff on with you by my side. i would be devastated without you, because you're my whole world. please stay with me always, yeobo.

past dps

i've had many faces.

my aesthetic

a visual lie.

behind the scenes

about the mun/typist.

I. call me nicole, nick, or nikki.

II. i'm well over the age of 18.

III. living in pdt/utc-7.

Iv. i'm a full time, adult student.

V. i'm a part time writing tutor.

Vi. i prefer detailed 1st, semi-para.

VIi. i can do 3rd, and multi-para.

VIIi. long replies take more time, duh.

free plots

some ideas for beginnings.

crime and punishment (open)

it once was mine (closed)

reading rainbow (open)

Title here