fresh fruits and a dollop of cream. at least once a week, shiah would treat herself to the same serving. a way, she defiantly exclaims, to remember her mother. born into a family of five, her being the second eldest, shiah was filed and chipped to be the 'perfect little brownie.' with parents who began a family during their reckless years, responsibilities were shared and collectively given among each child. however, it was especially tough for her. with an older brother sent off to find work, along with her father (who was barely at home being the breadwinner of the family,) shiah was left accompanying her mother through every chore and task on the list.

although the family lived with peace for most of her childhood, lady luck sneaked off one fine morning as tragedy struck instead. arguments and complaints were thrown across dinner tables, disagreements growing into painful remarks that by the end of it all it scarred each person. and everyone knows brownies, once hurt, will flee. her mother left - went up and away before dusk and suddenly the family was in shambles. her father refused to work, being the stubborn man he was, claiming to have done enough for the family as it is. with no recent news from her brother who had traveled further away, shiah found the strength of the family left dwindling in the palm of her hands. 

unpredictable. if there was one word shiah would be labelled under it would be unpredictable. she was the calm before the storm, yet the destructive storm itself all at once. brownies were tricky, and she knew it.

after jumping from household to household, juggling various odd part time jobs and errands, shiah finally came upon a store she found hope in. the pet store. to 'others' it was almost magical how easily some animals grew fond of her. one glance her way, and you'd believe shiah was a bright ball of sunshine. that is until you offend her- one wrong remark, one statement with undertones of condescension and the warmth she radiates dissipates into ice. her ego was fragile, her heart; weak.

no matter the amount of emotional pain she's been through, however, shiah refuses to let go of helping people. it was her source of distraction, and happiness or sorts. she helps when help is needed, and continues to help even after - some could even consider it a burden. but one wrong move, and she disappears. shiah senses the malicious intent behind others, be it if they took advantage of her, or imposes ideas and beliefs onto her.  at the same time, her benefit of the doubt overlooks it all, and propels her down a black hole of trouble. but bear in mind, once she decides enough is enough, you won't catch a trace of her. 

I don't think you realize when you love someone until you finally do. i think that is what makes love so beautiful. and when i say this i mean, there is no loud, screeching halt inside of your heart. neither is there a neon sign that lights up and lets you know just exactly what you've found is now your favorite thing. no. i don't think it works like that. i think it's quieter, much calmer. one day you're just sitting across from someone, and you're watching them tell a story you've probably heard twenty times before. and at that moment, everything inside of you feels safe. everything is serene, peaceful, and you almost laugh to yourself because in the midst of all the chaos, you realize just how deeply you care for them. within the crowded room, among the ruckus of the background music, and between the chatter of others around you, time begins to slow down for a moment. and there it is -- the rest of your life. there you've found it -- love.

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Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat.

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat.

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat.

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat.