meeting you was quite a life changing experience. you waltzed through the door with all your golden radiance and an aura made of silken roses and saltwater stained poetry, flitting from one corner of my heart to another like a flighty blue bird and shedding your light to every darkened corners. i wasnt looking for a love then, but you wedged yourself into the cavernous depths of my soul and filled it up with your presence (you made flowers bloom even in the darkest part of me)

it was never a love at first sight with you, no. perhaps it had been a love at the second glimpse, or maybe the third or the fourth; i could never be sure. the only thing i remember was seeing you walk towards me one day and suddenly the rest of the world seemed to melt away into watercolor puddles around my feet. loving you was an unexpected surprise. a sudden collision of stars that sent my world spiraling down into the raging ocean. and to tell you the truth, i had never expected it to be you, you know. but it is you, you are the one who holds all the jagged and chipped pieces of my heart in the palm of your hand and i honestly wouldnt have it any other way.

i am fully aware that while you are an angel who deserves all the best things the world has to offer, i have never been and will never be what people describe as 'the best'. i am only an average mortal. and no matter how much i long to gift you the universe, my arms are much too weak to encompass the entire universe and my soul much too weary to behold its magnificence. and how i wish i could protect you from the world, but my skin is paper thin and much too soft to go against its jagged edges. and no matter how i wish to, i cant promise you that everything will be alright. perhaps later down the road we would stumble upon a bump in this journey we call life. perhaps there will be a fair amount of fights and tears that will be spilled. it wont always be pretty with me, because life is not perfect and neither am i.  

but i can promise you this:

i couldnt give you the universe, but i will give you everything in me and more. i might be too soft for the world, but i would try my best to keep you well protected -- even if it means i would come back drenched in shades of yellow and blue and purple. i couldnt fight your battles for you, but we can try to fight them together -- or in the case i wasnt able to, i promise i would be there to welcome you into my arms at the end of the day and tell you that its okay, youve put up a great fight and i am so incredibly proud of you. our relationship wont always be pretty, and there will be high and low during the course of it, but i promise you i would try my hardest to make it work.  

i am a flawed man, and to be honest i have been super hesitant about this -- but i dont want to look back in five years time and think "we could have been magnificent, but i was afraid." in five years i want to tell of how fear tried to cheat me out of the best thing i life and i didnt let it. so here is me taking the jump -- (open the last picture!)