― about me

Yangyang was born an orphan, abandoned not too long after his birth. He was found on the doorstep of an old orphanage, wrapped in a single blanket to keep him warm throughout the end of winter. They took the boy in out of pity and raised him along with the other children, or so they attempted to. This certain orphanage was admittedly not the best one out there. It was led by a group of horrible people who could care less about the actual well-being of the children under their roof, and were quickly running out of government funds the moment they got greedy with the money they had been given to keep the place up. However, they were good at putting up a facade in the form of a beautiful, well kept front office and a clean building exterior. Beyond these walls, however, were tight rooms and terrible living conditions. The children were often unfed and left crying in the dark at night until the morning would calm them down once more. Yangyang was a shy and quiet boy, but he had managed to make one friend during his stay. This friend of his was older than him by two years, and they shared and did almost everything together. But then came a time that he eventually lost his friend after a family had come to adopt him, leaving him alone once more with other kids who had absolutely no interest in him at all. Upset that his sense of security and warmth was no longer there with him, he immediately broke down. After all, he didn't have to be an adult to know that he was suffering and uncared for. So, in an attempt to socialize again and find comfort in another person, Yangyang tried to interact with the orphanage workers instead, only to be continuously neglected and yelled at to go away. It weighed him down so heavily that he threw several tantrums just to get someone to hold him, leading to the discovery that if he were to be reckless enough, people would pay more attention to him. But when a lovely couple came one day in hopes of adopting him, he was suddenly very calm, though it was only temporary.

At the age of four, in the span of one year, Yangyang was adopted and returned fifteen times with no reason given as to why he was being repeatedly abandoned by people who were once ecstatic to bring him home. At the age of five, the orphanage workers had begun to despise him and his tantrums, beating the boy over and over again until he was quiet. A part of what could have been a decent childhood was ripped away from him as they isolated him in a separate room away from the other children, ignoring his cries and only showing themselves whenever he did something worth punishing him for. With all the constant neglect and abuse, this was when Yangyang had developed his very first alter at the age of five, a little boy who called himself Xiaoyang. He was like a twin and friend to him, the only companion he had inside the lonely room he was locked in. They got along very well and things had become much better. The orphanage workers, on the other hand, were very alarmed. Xiaoyang seemed to come to front whenever anger, attention, and abuse were involved. He would often show up as well whenever Yangyang was getting beaten up, reassuring the host personality that he could take it for him without problem. He was also much more violent than Yangyang when people refused to give them any attention, even going as far as stabbing through the door with the art materials they were once given to calm them. Finally, whenever their aggressive fit was over, none of the two personalities ever remember what had happened, and would go about their day as if nothing had gone wrong. Now determined to send the boy away as quickly as possible out of fear, they kept his mental health records a secret, hoping that some family would still come and take him with them. A year later, Yangyang was then adopted again at the age of six, but was soon returned to the orphanage after he had attempted to harm the couple with a kitchen knife.

The workers were frustrated, but the next day, a man in all black came in with some adoption papers. Seeing that the boy had such good records, the man thought he had found someone perfect to bring back with him, completely unaware of the boy's mental state. The stranger gave him a gentle pat on the head before offering his hand to the boy without uttering a single word. Curious although not expecting much, Yangyang once again left the orphanage behind, hoping that he would not have to return again. But little did he know of the darker hell that awaited him wherever they were going.

He was taken into a building far, far away from the orphanage. Yangyang had never experienced being outside much and was very unfamiliar of the surroundings, blindly following a man that hadn't said a word to him since they left. Xiaoyang was not at all worried, simply happy at the fact that someone held their hand willingly for once. Yangyang was a bit more wary than his alter, but had ended up getting distracted by every little thing they came across as he was being led down several hallways. At the end of it all, the man ushered him into an empty room, telling him to rest and that he would come back for him in the morning. He was rather confused at how different this man's place was from all the other homes of the families that had adopted him before, but he felt safe enough to relax. And so, Yangyang did as he was told, still unaware of the pain and agony he would soon experience beyond the walls of this seemingly safe room he was put in. Unfortunately, there was no other soul there to warn him of his impending predicament.

Things began to crash down on him once more as he was harshly pulled out from bed the next day, brought into another room that he was clearly not familiar with. He was first lectured by some other man, though he wasn't exactly listening. This was his very first mistake, as his lack of cooperation prompted the man to beat him up until he was bruised. Eventually silenced and forced to obey, Yangyang finally listened to the best of his ability despite the ringing in his ears. It went on like this for a few days until it was made clear to him that they were trying to teach him something "valuable", something "crucial" for his future, and that he was stuck with them forever and could not escape. And for a long while, Yangyang simply believed them in fear of dying in this unforgiving place. So he never questioned these strange men whenever they dropped a weapon into his hands, never asked why he was learning how to hurt someone. He had quickly learned that too many questions could get him into trouble, and so he kept them locked away. He had also learned that failure was not looked upon very well in this family, if the bruises and cuts on his body were anything to go by. A young hitman's world, is what they called it.

Whatever remained of his childhood was soon ripped away from him as well. Every single day was spent with nothing else but a lecture and a weapon in hand, and soon enough, Xiaoyang had started to get needy for affection and some playtime. Now, there was nothing in their records that mentioned anything about mental issues, so when the men had accidentally triggered an alter to come forward, they were utterly confused. Yangyang had suddenly become very childish and playful than usual, but little did they know that it wasn't him who was currently in control. Xiaoyang's sparkly eyes and lively nature immediately caught them off guard, suddenly unsure of what to do with him. The little alter, being his usual self, had asked them to play, and of course, like what most serious people did, they said no. And this was when they had realized that they shouldn't have rejected him. When Xiaoyang's smile had changed into an angry frown, they simply stood there, not expecting the child to do anything but cry. Instead, the boy grabbed the dagger they had presented to him not too long ago, stabbing one of the men straight in the chest. Faltering in fear for a moment, they stepped back from the suddenly violent child. When they finally moved to grab him and pull him away, Xiaoyang dropped the weapon and giggled, happy that they were somewhat paying attention to him.

Years passed by like this and people have eventually learned to act accordingly whenever they were around Yangyang. The boy was much more aware of what he was doing now, even knew the name of the gang that had taken quite a portion of his young life away. Yangyang eventually grew up to be just like the rest of them, stealthy and skilled with either a weapon or just his bare hands. He was growing colder each day, unforgiving with little to no sense of sympathy for others. Though no matter what, he was still beaten down one way or another, sometimes lightly and sometimes so bad that he needed hours in the clinic to get patched up. People here were harsh and he knew that, the verbal and physical abuse were equally as heavy as each other. It wounded his mental state even further, leading to the appearance of another alter named Liuyan, a persecutor. His alters would occasionally clash sometimes as Liuyan was a little more violent than the rest, but all seemed to share the same body very well regardless. Yangyang was almost always the front, and none of the others complained. It was when another alter came in that things started to change a little. Yin, a caretaker alter, suddenly appeared one day after Xiaoyang's many failed attempts at gaining affection from anyone. He was the gentlest out of all of them, though he would often argue with Liuyan about matters when it came to protecting the others.

With all these personalities together in one body, training Yangyang had suddenly become quite a hassle. But still, nothing much had changed and the boy was still continuously beaten and scarred into the man they wanted him to be. Sure, some of them actually feared the seemingly deranged boy, but they were wise enough to keep their expression hidden. The only person who was ever really comfortable around him was an older hitman named Ten. Yangyang and all of his other alters just couldn't bring themselves to be violent around him and the precious little girl he had around him who Xiaoyang still decided to grow very attached to despite losing contact with them at the age of eighteen.

At that time, Yangyang was already more than capable enough of doing what was asked of him without fail. All the cuts and bruises he had sustained over the years have long since disappeared, leaving behind a strong and unforgiving soul with a taste for blood and a sense of satisfaction in the suffering of others. However, no one could ever really erase all the years of trauma he had to endure. But that was okay, he told himself. At least, even if the rest of the world were to turn their backs and abandon him, he had a family of alters to walk with forever.

 ― personalities and alters

yangyang [ host ] - the main front of the body, usually quiet and very mysterious. he doesn't trust people very easily and is quite careful when it comes to choosing his loved ones. he's a trained hitman, with all those years of suffering turning him into a cold and merciless killer. he may be bloodthirsty and violent on the surface, but somewhere deep inside is a part of him that's still capable of being peaceful.

xiaoyang [ little / child alter ] - yangyang's twin alter who first appeared when he was around five years old. xiaoyang continued to age alongside the host and was believed to have eventually stopped aging at eight years old. he's a mood maker, mainly because of his playful and lively personality. forever young, he's constantly searching for something fun and interesting to do and may often get into trouble. he loves receiving attention and will look for love and affection from anyone. on the surface, this child alter is rather lovely. that is, until you reject him. xiaoyang handles yangyang's childhood trauma. he was a neglected child and would often throw tantrums just to have someone's eyes on him. xiaoyang acts a similar way, although much more aggressively. a simple "no" can make xiaoyang go rabid and extremely violent, so mind your words around this alter.

liuyan [ protector / persecutor ] - yangyang's second alter, in charge of holding abusive trauma from when he started training for corvus. liuyan is almost like yangyang in terms of personality, cold and lacking in empathy. he's the alter that puts everyone back into line when they step beyond a limit, and thus, has to stay strong and charismatic in order for the others to listen to him. although liuyan is a protector, keep in mind that he is a persecutor type and will not hesitate to harm anyone especially if it ensures their survival. he is known to wound the body to punish stubborn alters and will also threaten external forces and relationships in order to protect themselves. age is unknown, but is believed to be around the same age as yangyang.

yin [ caretaker alter ] - the gentlest alter out of all the others. as a caretaker, yin is in charge of soothing and keeping the alters calm and content. caretakers are very good at providing for the body, but often forget to care for themselves which may cause them to develop disorders. yin is very selfless and will do anything to protect the alters. he loves children and dotes on xiaoyang the most as he is the only child alter within the body. he doesn't discriminate against external relationships but will always prioritize their alters more than anyone else. age is unknown, but is believed to be the oldest.

 ― my serendipity

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 ― out of character

NOTHING MUCH TO SAY HERE, REALLY. I'M GMT+8 WITH A WONKY SCHEDULE BUT HMU IF YOU WANT TO RP ANYWAY UWU. check plot limit.

 ― tracker

location / name / status

location / name / status

location / name / status

location / name / status

location / name / status