Personal Message
from ѕσℓєℓυηα
character playlist (wip)
- the swans / jean castel
- let it cover me up / lydia
- orange / julianna joy, ariza
- other self / calva louise
- howl / florence + the machine
- savages / marina
Description
1
basic information
Name ›
Na Jaemin
Age ›
Twenty Three
Secondary ›
Omega
Affiliation ›
Packless
Current Residence ›
Soleluna
Occupation ›
Youth Camp Counselor
Orientations ›
Demiromantic, Panual
Relationship Status ›
Single, Focused on One
SNS ›
@magnus.njm (defunct)
SNS ›
@lovelybun7 (active)
Height ›
5'10" (177cm)
Hair Color ›
Pink
Eye Color ›
Brown
Scent ›
Rosemary + Candied Lemon
Body Modifications ›
Ear peircings (1s), dyed hair.
Notable Characteristics › He has bite marks on both of his trapezii; on his left trapezius is the bite left by his father when he had to subdue Jaemin during a ferocity episode, and on his right trapezius is the mating bite left by his previous alpha partner. more to come...
Dress Style › Casual and sometimes preppy. Fitted jeans and t-shirts, or slacks and button-downs with vests. Favors lighter colors and pastel tones over darker ones. Likes to accessorize, earrings, rings, necklaces, etc. Usually wears a little makeup when going out (eyeliner and lip gloss, sometimes light eyeshadow if he's feeling fancy).
2
history
beginning : a father's sun
"What goes on behind closed doors;
you should know better than to look."
NOTE: the following is told from the character's point of view, and his thoughts and feelings on certain subjects do not represent the mun's own personal opinions
TRIGGER WARNINGS: implied m/f non-consensual and pregnancy, child neglect & abuse, ism
This story starts with a half-wanted child.
Na Yongseok - the leader and prime alpha of the Magnus Sol pack - desired a potential heir, and he would consummate his marriage to Lee Yura - an omega from a smaller, less influential pack - much sooner than she wished for. Yura became pregnant with their first child mere days after their wedding. Six months later she would give birth to a healthy baby boy: Jaemin.
Lee Yura did not love this child. From the very moment she laid eyes on him she knew that she could not give Jaemin the care and affection of a mother. Na Yongseok was pleased to have a first-born son, but beyond this he held no true love for Jaemin. To Yongseok the child was an investment for the future, something that could be left alone until the time was right.
Six years passed by in the Na family home.
All of Jaemin's milestones - his first shift, first "shift pains," and more - were not celebrated, except by the staff members in charge of caring for the young boy. His mother remained in her private room all day and all night, and his father was rarely ever home in the first place.
It was a quiet and lonely beginning.
Upon his sixth birthday Jaemin had his first conversation with his father. It was not to congratulate the boy for being born, and it was not to surprise him with a gift either. Instead, his father had one message for him: Jaemin was to begin primary school at an elite institution, and he must make sure not to tarnish the Na family name.
Jaemin, a pup starving for even mere scraps of affection, promised that he would do his best to make his father proud.
School was harder than Jaemin expected it to be. He didn't have any friends upon arriving, and due to his somewhat sheltered "upbringing" he didn't know how to properly interact with others. It's no surprise that this led to him getting into trouble.
Six years for one conversation with his father, and a week later to feel the sting of Na Yongseok's hand against his cheek.
Jaemin learned very quickly what consequences would be waiting for him if he messed up again. It was hard, but he managed to straighten himself out and settle in at school. He was able to make friends once other kids found out who his father was, and his grades were near the top of the class.
The smile he received from his father after his first report card was worth the stinging pain from any of his punishments.
Jaemin continued to excel in school. The better he did the more he saw of his father, and the less he saw of his mother, who seemed to retreat even further into herself as Yongseok deigned to come around the family home more and more often.
Even though he was receiving the affection he so desired, Jaemin was greedy for more. He didn't speak upon it, but it was there, inside him, and he wished very hard for more, more, more like any child would.
A wish that he would come to regret upon his twelfth year.
you should know better than to look."
NOTE: the following is told from the character's point of view, and his thoughts and feelings on certain subjects do not represent the mun's own personal opinions
TRIGGER WARNINGS: implied m/f non-consensual and pregnancy, child neglect & abuse, ism
This story starts with a half-wanted child.
Na Yongseok - the leader and prime alpha of the Magnus Sol pack - desired a potential heir, and he would consummate his marriage to Lee Yura - an omega from a smaller, less influential pack - much sooner than she wished for. Yura became pregnant with their first child mere days after their wedding. Six months later she would give birth to a healthy baby boy: Jaemin.
Lee Yura did not love this child. From the very moment she laid eyes on him she knew that she could not give Jaemin the care and affection of a mother. Na Yongseok was pleased to have a first-born son, but beyond this he held no true love for Jaemin. To Yongseok the child was an investment for the future, something that could be left alone until the time was right.
Six years passed by in the Na family home.
All of Jaemin's milestones - his first shift, first "shift pains," and more - were not celebrated, except by the staff members in charge of caring for the young boy. His mother remained in her private room all day and all night, and his father was rarely ever home in the first place.
It was a quiet and lonely beginning.
Upon his sixth birthday Jaemin had his first conversation with his father. It was not to congratulate the boy for being born, and it was not to surprise him with a gift either. Instead, his father had one message for him: Jaemin was to begin primary school at an elite institution, and he must make sure not to tarnish the Na family name.
Jaemin, a pup starving for even mere scraps of affection, promised that he would do his best to make his father proud.
School was harder than Jaemin expected it to be. He didn't have any friends upon arriving, and due to his somewhat sheltered "upbringing" he didn't know how to properly interact with others. It's no surprise that this led to him getting into trouble.
Six years for one conversation with his father, and a week later to feel the sting of Na Yongseok's hand against his cheek.
Jaemin learned very quickly what consequences would be waiting for him if he messed up again. It was hard, but he managed to straighten himself out and settle in at school. He was able to make friends once other kids found out who his father was, and his grades were near the top of the class.
The smile he received from his father after his first report card was worth the stinging pain from any of his punishments.
Jaemin continued to excel in school. The better he did the more he saw of his father, and the less he saw of his mother, who seemed to retreat even further into herself as Yongseok deigned to come around the family home more and more often.
Even though he was receiving the affection he so desired, Jaemin was greedy for more. He didn't speak upon it, but it was there, inside him, and he wished very hard for more, more, more like any child would.
A wish that he would come to regret upon his twelfth year.
rising action : heir to the throne
"Heavy is he head that wears the crown."
TRIGGER WARNINGS: unhealthy relationships, power imbalance, child neglect & abuse, ism, anti-lgbtq+ beliefs
Jaemin presented as a prime alpha just days after his twelfth birthday. His father was immensely pleased at this development, and he declared Jaemin as his heir immediately.
It was just the start of the pressures that would be placed on Jaemin's shoulders over the next eight years.
To ensure that Jaemin was upholding the Na family name his father now stayed at the family estate. Jaemin saw him nearly everyday, and his mother became a forgotten fixture deep in the shadows of the estate's many rooms. She refused to speak to Yongseok, and due to Jaemin's proximity to the man she passed the same refusal onto her son, no words being exchanged between them.
Jaemin, still young and desiring a close connection with his father, did his best to follow all of Yongseok's teachings.
He was told that alphas were the top of the social ladder, and any secondary below them was equivalent to gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe. He was shown that a prime can use their voice for just about anything, and even when they don't use their voice others are expected to listen. Women were to be subservient to the men in their lives; engaging in behavior out of the "traditional" gender binary was looked down upon; and everyone is out to get something from you.
Na Yongeok planted seeds of egoism and distrust in his son, leading to Jaemin growing into the worst version of himself.
These newfound aspects of Jaemin's personality were at odds with who he truly was deep down. The caring parts of him, the sweet parts of him, were stamped out before they even had the chance to show themselves. And he knew his heart didn't truly lie in what his father wanted from him.
This is what led to the development of Jaemin's ego at the time, a way to compensate for his lack of self-esteem. He tricked himself into believing that others were to cater to him and his needs, and that when he walked into a room the only person of higher status than him was Na Yongseok.
From there it was easy for Jaemin to go on a power trip.
He behaved like a "traditional" alpha in public, talking down to betas and omegas alike, and making it known that he excpected others to wait on him hand and foot. Jaemin garnered a reputation as a brash, narcissistic in the upper echelons of society. At first it was seen as normal, and he would still have other rich kids, usually alphas like himself, hanging around him at events. But as his demeanor worsened even further it became less ideal for people to associate with him, or the rest of the Magnus Sol pack for that matter.
When he wasn't walking all over the people around him in public Jaemin was acting like the spoiled prince of the Magnus Sol pack compound. He wanted to come off as the son his father was proud of, so he would not make known the discipline his father put him through, or the fact that Na Yongseok's "love" for him was purely transactional, tied only to Jaemin's usefulness.
But this facade of grandure and confidence could not fool everyone.
Within the Magnus Sol pack was another alpha that Jaemin butted heads with. He saw right through the heir's attempts at hiding what he was really feeling, poking at all of Jaemin's insecurities and riling him up until they were going at each other's throats.
It was the realest connection Jaemin had ever had up to that point.
The barbs and blows between them eventually became less frequent, and they grew closer than anticipated. A friendship of sorts that started when Jaemin was seveteen years old.
And for awhile it was nothing more than that; until Na Yongseok began the process of finding Jaemin a wife. Yongseok wanted his son to have a beautiful omegan bride, just like he did. Jaemin knew what that had done to his mother, a ghost of whoever she used to be before he was born.
But he could not refuse an order from his prime alpha.
Jaemin felt the walls closing in on him, boxing him in like a prized possession, a thing and not a person. He was suffocating, he could hardly breathe; and he knew it would only get worse.
So he acted out. Tried to break through those walls and ignore the cracks in his own foundation widening.
First it was ignoring his father's orders.
Then it was amping up his lack of decorum in public.
And eventually, all of these factors led to Jaemin initiating an intimate relationship with that very same alpha he used to fight tooth and nail.
He told himself it was just another way to rebel against his father (even though their relationship was secret). He told himself it was just a distraction from the impending future that he did not want. He told himself every lie in the book to deny the truth of his relationship with the other alpha.
That it was anything, everything, but love.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: unhealthy relationships, power imbalance, child neglect & abuse, ism, anti-lgbtq+ beliefs
Jaemin presented as a prime alpha just days after his twelfth birthday. His father was immensely pleased at this development, and he declared Jaemin as his heir immediately.
It was just the start of the pressures that would be placed on Jaemin's shoulders over the next eight years.
To ensure that Jaemin was upholding the Na family name his father now stayed at the family estate. Jaemin saw him nearly everyday, and his mother became a forgotten fixture deep in the shadows of the estate's many rooms. She refused to speak to Yongseok, and due to Jaemin's proximity to the man she passed the same refusal onto her son, no words being exchanged between them.
Jaemin, still young and desiring a close connection with his father, did his best to follow all of Yongseok's teachings.
He was told that alphas were the top of the social ladder, and any secondary below them was equivalent to gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe. He was shown that a prime can use their voice for just about anything, and even when they don't use their voice others are expected to listen. Women were to be subservient to the men in their lives; engaging in behavior out of the "traditional" gender binary was looked down upon; and everyone is out to get something from you.
Na Yongeok planted seeds of egoism and distrust in his son, leading to Jaemin growing into the worst version of himself.
These newfound aspects of Jaemin's personality were at odds with who he truly was deep down. The caring parts of him, the sweet parts of him, were stamped out before they even had the chance to show themselves. And he knew his heart didn't truly lie in what his father wanted from him.
This is what led to the development of Jaemin's ego at the time, a way to compensate for his lack of self-esteem. He tricked himself into believing that others were to cater to him and his needs, and that when he walked into a room the only person of higher status than him was Na Yongseok.
From there it was easy for Jaemin to go on a power trip.
He behaved like a "traditional" alpha in public, talking down to betas and omegas alike, and making it known that he excpected others to wait on him hand and foot. Jaemin garnered a reputation as a brash, narcissistic in the upper echelons of society. At first it was seen as normal, and he would still have other rich kids, usually alphas like himself, hanging around him at events. But as his demeanor worsened even further it became less ideal for people to associate with him, or the rest of the Magnus Sol pack for that matter.
When he wasn't walking all over the people around him in public Jaemin was acting like the spoiled prince of the Magnus Sol pack compound. He wanted to come off as the son his father was proud of, so he would not make known the discipline his father put him through, or the fact that Na Yongseok's "love" for him was purely transactional, tied only to Jaemin's usefulness.
But this facade of grandure and confidence could not fool everyone.
Within the Magnus Sol pack was another alpha that Jaemin butted heads with. He saw right through the heir's attempts at hiding what he was really feeling, poking at all of Jaemin's insecurities and riling him up until they were going at each other's throats.
It was the realest connection Jaemin had ever had up to that point.
The barbs and blows between them eventually became less frequent, and they grew closer than anticipated. A friendship of sorts that started when Jaemin was seveteen years old.
And for awhile it was nothing more than that; until Na Yongseok began the process of finding Jaemin a wife. Yongseok wanted his son to have a beautiful omegan bride, just like he did. Jaemin knew what that had done to his mother, a ghost of whoever she used to be before he was born.
But he could not refuse an order from his prime alpha.
Jaemin felt the walls closing in on him, boxing him in like a prized possession, a thing and not a person. He was suffocating, he could hardly breathe; and he knew it would only get worse.
So he acted out. Tried to break through those walls and ignore the cracks in his own foundation widening.
First it was ignoring his father's orders.
Then it was amping up his lack of decorum in public.
And eventually, all of these factors led to Jaemin initiating an intimate relationship with that very same alpha he used to fight tooth and nail.
He told himself it was just another way to rebel against his father (even though their relationship was secret). He told himself it was just a distraction from the impending future that he did not want. He told himself every lie in the book to deny the truth of his relationship with the other alpha.
That it was anything, everything, but love.
: twisted little thing
"QUOTE GOES HERE,
AND HERE."
TRIGGER WARNINGS: very dubious consent, ing, ist language, power imabalance, unhealthy relationships
- even when he is punished jaemin continues to defy his father's authority, while at the same time still trying to maintain his father's expectations of him; it's a confusing dissonance.
- jaemin wants to be a good heir, but he also has no interest in taking over the pack, but he's a prime alpha he deserves to lead the pack, but he knows he's not good enough, etc. etc.
- he continues to spend time with the alpha that he became friends with, and at this point their bond has developed into something more. they sleep together, but do not call themselves lovers. it doesn't matter that jaemin has stopped seeing anyone else, or that the other alpha has no other suitors either, they still aren't lovers, but they are something
- jaemin begins to feel ill and visits a doctor that is not part of the pack
- after some discussions the doctor suggests to jaemin that what he's dealing with may be some kind of hormonal imbalance combined with extreme levels of stress, and that he may want to try hormone therapy
- jaemin asks the doctor if it will affect his alpha status, and the doctor says that it shouldn't as long as jaemin doesn't engage in certain behaviors
- jaemin doesn't tell his father about the treatment he is receiving
- it doesn't seem to be helping with how messed up jaemin feels in the head, and it shows in the way he becomes increasingly more agitated and infuriating to be around. even his alpha partner is showing concern/frustration with him, and jaemin hates the way that it makes his skin crawl with vulnerability
- it's not a mental breakdown - it's not - jaemin says, when he finally starts really self-destructing
- first its refusing to follow any of his father's orders; then its acting out in ways that make it onto the news and into the papers; it gets to the point of jaemin publicly denying his engagement to the beautiful, meek omega that his father chose for him; and then finally, the last straw
- jaemin tells his alpha partner to him; he knows the treatment he's been receiving from the doctor has made his body able to accept the transition.
- his alpha knows that jaemin isn't totally in his right mind, and at first he says no, until jaemin asks him enough that he relents, but only by saying that he can't bring himself to do it unless jaemin compels him to
- jaemin compels his alpha partner to him
- the ing takes place over several days in which the two of them are locked inside jaemin's room/personal home (penthouse?) and jaemin only remembers bits and pieces of it in the future due to the intensity, the sudden changes in his body and ofc his already deteriorated mental health
- once its over jaemin wakes up to find himself now an omega (and he doesn't know it at that point yet but he also lost his compelling voice in the process)
- his alpha is gone
- jaemin eventually has to leave his home and decides to present his newfound secondary status in the most newsworthy way possible; by attending an event run by his father still smelling like claimed omega
- HAMLET VIBES DON'T LET ME FORGET
- this causes a domino effect in which the alpha jaemin was with is banished from the pack, and jaemin himself is severely punished by his father before eventually also being banished from the pack.
- jaemin has nothing, had no time to grab his things before they kicked him out with nothing but the clothes on his back, and he is forced to start a new life in the city by himself
AND HERE."
TRIGGER WARNINGS: very dubious consent, ing, ist language, power imabalance, unhealthy relationships
- even when he is punished jaemin continues to defy his father's authority, while at the same time still trying to maintain his father's expectations of him; it's a confusing dissonance.
- jaemin wants to be a good heir, but he also has no interest in taking over the pack, but he's a prime alpha he deserves to lead the pack, but he knows he's not good enough, etc. etc.
- he continues to spend time with the alpha that he became friends with, and at this point their bond has developed into something more. they sleep together, but do not call themselves lovers. it doesn't matter that jaemin has stopped seeing anyone else, or that the other alpha has no other suitors either, they still aren't lovers, but they are something
- jaemin begins to feel ill and visits a doctor that is not part of the pack
- after some discussions the doctor suggests to jaemin that what he's dealing with may be some kind of hormonal imbalance combined with extreme levels of stress, and that he may want to try hormone therapy
- jaemin asks the doctor if it will affect his alpha status, and the doctor says that it shouldn't as long as jaemin doesn't engage in certain behaviors
- jaemin doesn't tell his father about the treatment he is receiving
- it doesn't seem to be helping with how messed up jaemin feels in the head, and it shows in the way he becomes increasingly more agitated and infuriating to be around. even his alpha partner is showing concern/frustration with him, and jaemin hates the way that it makes his skin crawl with vulnerability
- it's not a mental breakdown - it's not - jaemin says, when he finally starts really self-destructing
- first its refusing to follow any of his father's orders; then its acting out in ways that make it onto the news and into the papers; it gets to the point of jaemin publicly denying his engagement to the beautiful, meek omega that his father chose for him; and then finally, the last straw
- jaemin tells his alpha partner to him; he knows the treatment he's been receiving from the doctor has made his body able to accept the transition.
- his alpha knows that jaemin isn't totally in his right mind, and at first he says no, until jaemin asks him enough that he relents, but only by saying that he can't bring himself to do it unless jaemin compels him to
- jaemin compels his alpha partner to him
- the ing takes place over several days in which the two of them are locked inside jaemin's room/personal home (penthouse?) and jaemin only remembers bits and pieces of it in the future due to the intensity, the sudden changes in his body and ofc his already deteriorated mental health
- once its over jaemin wakes up to find himself now an omega (and he doesn't know it at that point yet but he also lost his compelling voice in the process)
- his alpha is gone
- jaemin eventually has to leave his home and decides to present his newfound secondary status in the most newsworthy way possible; by attending an event run by his father still smelling like claimed omega
- HAMLET VIBES DON'T LET ME FORGET
- this causes a domino effect in which the alpha jaemin was with is banished from the pack, and jaemin himself is severely punished by his father before eventually also being banished from the pack.
- jaemin has nothing, had no time to grab his things before they kicked him out with nothing but the clothes on his back, and he is forced to start a new life in the city by himself
falling action : rediscovery
"Tell me how did we get here?
And where the do we go now?"
Hitting rock bottom was the truest wakeup call that Jaemin could have gotten. It's hard to stay stuck in your ways when you don't even know if you'll have a place to sleep for the night.
Upon arriving to Soleluna he ended up drifting for several weeks from place to place before he eventually wound up at an assistance center for omegas down on their luck.
Since his transition was still so fresh he didn't feel like he qualified for their services, but he did meet a handful of other omegas there who were willing to help him get back on his feet.
Jaemin worked several odd jobs for awhile until he was earning a stable income working as a cleaner for a close friend.
[more to come]
+++
seen as a disgrace and a blight to his family's name jaemin was banished from the pack and his bond to them severed. he did not attempt to join the sol pack upon moving to the city, preferring to remain packless. without a penny to his name jaemin had to work for months to bring himself to a somewhat stable life. he now works as a counselor at a youth camp - mostly during the summer - and also takes online classes in order to complete his degree.
- going for the vibes of "aww what a cutie !! oh he's alittle bit A LOT ed up actually"
- magnus sol means "big sun," as the pack that jaemin was born into believes they are better than the sol pack, and have rightful claim to be the more powerful of the two
- jaemin's father = p.o.s
- jaemin was of a slightly higher status than his alpha, being the heir to his pack and all that. therefore in public spaces this alpha had to defer to him. this also carried over into their private moments
+++
Unlike most modern transitions, Jaemin's is dirty and violent.
+++
"You'll have to compel me," he says.
Jaemin's breath hitches. He wets his lips; doesn't hesitate when he says, with power behind his words this time, "Make me your ."
And where the do we go now?"
Hitting rock bottom was the truest wakeup call that Jaemin could have gotten. It's hard to stay stuck in your ways when you don't even know if you'll have a place to sleep for the night.
Upon arriving to Soleluna he ended up drifting for several weeks from place to place before he eventually wound up at an assistance center for omegas down on their luck.
Since his transition was still so fresh he didn't feel like he qualified for their services, but he did meet a handful of other omegas there who were willing to help him get back on his feet.
Jaemin worked several odd jobs for awhile until he was earning a stable income working as a cleaner for a close friend.
[more to come]
+++
seen as a disgrace and a blight to his family's name jaemin was banished from the pack and his bond to them severed. he did not attempt to join the sol pack upon moving to the city, preferring to remain packless. without a penny to his name jaemin had to work for months to bring himself to a somewhat stable life. he now works as a counselor at a youth camp - mostly during the summer - and also takes online classes in order to complete his degree.
- going for the vibes of "aww what a cutie !! oh he's a
- magnus sol means "big sun," as the pack that jaemin was born into believes they are better than the sol pack, and have rightful claim to be the more powerful of the two
- jaemin's father = p.o.s
- jaemin was of a slightly higher status than his alpha, being the heir to his pack and all that. therefore in public spaces this alpha had to defer to him. this also carried over into their private moments
+++
Unlike most modern transitions, Jaemin's is dirty and violent.
+++
"You'll have to compel me," he says.
Jaemin's breath hitches. He wets his lips; doesn't hesitate when he says, with power behind his words this time, "Make me your ."
3
personality & details
coming soon...
- his hobbies include cooking and photogrpahy
- most of his current friends are betas and omegas, simply because they were his first support system when he was banished from his pack
- on the surface jaemin comes off as normal, but the deeper you get to know him you might start to notice that he's not as composed as he outwardly appears
- he hates the taste of strawberries
- jaemin enjoys taking care of those he loves, and will often cook for them and check up on those he hasn't heard from in awhile
- very possessive of what he considers his. this does not apply to objects and items, but rather his relationships and people.
- selfish. it may not appear so at first, but he knows he is.
- jaemin reminds his friends to love themselves and be accepting of their faults and traits they may not like, but he's a hypocrite in this regard. sick with himself.
- he thinks he's unloveable. or rather, he thinks that no one could truly love all parts of himself.
- his hobbies include cooking and photogrpahy
- most of his current friends are betas and omegas, simply because they were his first support system when he was banished from his pack
- on the surface jaemin comes off as normal, but the deeper you get to know him you might start to notice that he's not as composed as he outwardly appears
- he hates the taste of strawberries
- jaemin enjoys taking care of those he loves, and will often cook for them and check up on those he hasn't heard from in awhile
- very possessive of what he considers his. this does not apply to objects and items, but rather his relationships and people.
- selfish. it may not appear so at first, but he knows he is.
- jaemin reminds his friends to love themselves and be accepting of their faults and traits they may not like, but he's a hypocrite in this regard. sick with himself.
- he thinks he's unloveable. or rather, he thinks that no one could truly love all parts of himself.
4
oneshots & writing snippets
summer brother ›
— Yumi attends the camp that Jaemin counsels at. She is one of the younger members - around 6/7 years old - and before this scene she fell and hurt her knee while playing with the other children. Jaemin attempts to distract her while getting her to first aid.
Yumi makes a surprised noise as Jaemin lifts her into his arms, small hands clinging to his sweatshirt.
"No! You smell like a stinky plant," she says.
Jaemin gasps, exaggerating his wounded expression.
"Me? A stinky plant?" he asks. She giggles and nods, covering her nose to emphasize her point. Jaemin pouts at the young girl and pushes her hair out of her eyes. "Well, you smell just like a sugary sweet marshmallow," he says, starting to smile. He pretends to sniff the air around her head and Yumi's eyes widen. "So sweet I could just... eat you up!"
Jaemin suddenly tickles her side and Yumi squeals, wriggling in his arms.
"No, don't eat me!" she cries between peals of laughter.
never the same ›
— The morning after Jaemin's ing. His partner is gone, and instead of struggling to deal with the aftermath he just isn't dealing at all.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: implied ing, dissociation, self-hatred, ual themes, ism & ist language
He thought he would feel different after.
Instead, he just feels numb.
His bed is empty. Silk sheets are draped over his lower half, clutched in a white knuckle grip that he releases slowly. The room is quiet except for the low drone of the fan in the corner. It smells like and sweat, their combined scents still mingling in the air.
Jaemin shifts and feels leftover and slick dripping from his hole.
They actually did it...
He's not a prime alpha anymore.
He should be more thrilled at the thought of seeing his father's face when he finds out; when he learns that his son let himself get ed into the mattress like a , let himself be bred like a .
Still, he feels nothing.
Jaemin's starting to drift off, mind slipping further and further away from the present.
He wishes he was here. Wishes he was holding Jaemin; dirty, vile thing that he is.
But he's gone.
It's cold.
last act, end scene ›
— This takes place shortly before Jaemin's ing; due to well, all the things he's been dealing with he slips into a ferocity episode at a fancy Sol pack gala, attacking one of the other guests before being humiliatingly subdued by his father.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: physical violence, ferocity endemic, suicidal ideation/thoughts
"Say it again."
"Uh-"
Jaemin places his champagne glass on the table and takes a step forward into the other alpha's space. He repeats himself in a low tone that leaves no room for refusing an order.
"Say it. Again."
The other alpha opens his mouth and Jaemin's head is filled with static.
In the next moment he has the alpha by the hair and slams their head onto the table. The table rattles and several glasses are sent crashing to the floor, shattering and pulling everyone's attention to the scene. Jaemin isn't paying attention to them; he isn't thinking about anything, really, as shoves the alpha down again, and a third time.
Someone tries to pull him away and Jaemin snarls at them, leaving the alpha slumped against the table as he turns to attack.
He's vaguely aware of screaming and laughter.
And in between it all the cacophony is punctuated by a loud voice, "Na Jaemin!"
Jaemin swings toward the voice with the intent to hurt; but he finds himself pinned to the floor suddenly, head cracking against the ballroom tiles. He claws against the grout beneath his fingernails, eyes wild and unseeing.
"Get a hold of yourself," the voice growls, and Jaemin snaps his teeth in response.
His father wrenches his arm behind his back and Jaemin can't push himself up. Still he tries, kicking and spitting, slashing at the forearm against his neck.
A guttural scream tears from his throat when sharp teeth dig into the meat of his shoulder, burning like a brand, searing him from the inside out. His heart thuds in his chest and in his ears, and hot sticky blood drips onto the floor as Jaemin gives one last effort to break free, causing the fangs embedded in him to rip and tear and dig even deeper.
In a single moment of shaky clarity Jaemin thinks that this time his father might really be trying to kill him.
(Sometimes he wishes it were true.)
The forced submission is finally enough to put an end to his ferocity.
Jaemin pants against the dirty, cold tiles, head foggy, ears ringing, bruised and defeated.
— Yumi attends the camp that Jaemin counsels at. She is one of the younger members - around 6/7 years old - and before this scene she fell and hurt her knee while playing with the other children. Jaemin attempts to distract her while getting her to first aid.
Yumi makes a surprised noise as Jaemin lifts her into his arms, small hands clinging to his sweatshirt.
"No! You smell like a stinky plant," she says.
Jaemin gasps, exaggerating his wounded expression.
"Me? A stinky plant?" he asks. She giggles and nods, covering her nose to emphasize her point. Jaemin pouts at the young girl and pushes her hair out of her eyes. "Well, you smell just like a sugary sweet marshmallow," he says, starting to smile. He pretends to sniff the air around her head and Yumi's eyes widen. "So sweet I could just... eat you up!"
Jaemin suddenly tickles her side and Yumi squeals, wriggling in his arms.
"No, don't eat me!" she cries between peals of laughter.
never the same ›
— The morning after Jaemin's ing. His partner is gone, and instead of struggling to deal with the aftermath he just isn't dealing at all.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: implied ing, dissociation, self-hatred, ual themes, ism & ist language
He thought he would feel different after.
Instead, he just feels numb.
His bed is empty. Silk sheets are draped over his lower half, clutched in a white knuckle grip that he releases slowly. The room is quiet except for the low drone of the fan in the corner. It smells like and sweat, their combined scents still mingling in the air.
Jaemin shifts and feels leftover and slick dripping from his hole.
They actually did it...
He's not a prime alpha anymore.
He should be more thrilled at the thought of seeing his father's face when he finds out; when he learns that his son let himself get ed into the mattress like a , let himself be bred like a .
Still, he feels nothing.
Jaemin's starting to drift off, mind slipping further and further away from the present.
He wishes he was here. Wishes he was holding Jaemin; dirty, vile thing that he is.
But he's gone.
It's cold.
last act, end scene ›
— This takes place shortly before Jaemin's ing; due to well, all the things he's been dealing with he slips into a ferocity episode at a fancy Sol pack gala, attacking one of the other guests before being humiliatingly subdued by his father.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: physical violence, ferocity endemic, suicidal ideation/thoughts
"Say it again."
"Uh-"
Jaemin places his champagne glass on the table and takes a step forward into the other alpha's space. He repeats himself in a low tone that leaves no room for refusing an order.
"Say it. Again."
The other alpha opens his mouth and Jaemin's head is filled with static.
In the next moment he has the alpha by the hair and slams their head onto the table. The table rattles and several glasses are sent crashing to the floor, shattering and pulling everyone's attention to the scene. Jaemin isn't paying attention to them; he isn't thinking about anything, really, as shoves the alpha down again, and a third time.
Someone tries to pull him away and Jaemin snarls at them, leaving the alpha slumped against the table as he turns to attack.
He's vaguely aware of screaming and laughter.
And in between it all the cacophony is punctuated by a loud voice, "Na Jaemin!"
Jaemin swings toward the voice with the intent to hurt; but he finds himself pinned to the floor suddenly, head cracking against the ballroom tiles. He claws against the grout beneath his fingernails, eyes wild and unseeing.
"Get a hold of yourself," the voice growls, and Jaemin snaps his teeth in response.
His father wrenches his arm behind his back and Jaemin can't push himself up. Still he tries, kicking and spitting, slashing at the forearm against his neck.
A guttural scream tears from his throat when sharp teeth dig into the meat of his shoulder, burning like a brand, searing him from the inside out. His heart thuds in his chest and in his ears, and hot sticky blood drips onto the floor as Jaemin gives one last effort to break free, causing the fangs embedded in him to rip and tear and dig even deeper.
In a single moment of shaky clarity Jaemin thinks that this time his father might really be trying to kill him.
(Sometimes he wishes it were true.)
The forced submission is finally enough to put an end to his ferocity.
Jaemin pants against the dirty, cold tiles, head foggy, ears ringing, bruised and defeated.
5
significant other
But I must explain to you how all this mistaken idea of denouncing pleasure and praising pain was born and I will give you a complete account of the system, and expound the actual teachings of the great explorer of the truth, the master-builder of human happiness.
6
connections & scenarios
my obsession (tentatively OPEN but like i will be begging on my hands and knees for an alpha lee donghyuck/haechan bc nahyuck makes my brain go @nKJ@$*#UWED(*(@&!)
- alpha, male
the alpha that jaemin was involved with back in his old pack and the one that also ed him into the omega that he is now. they haven't seen each other since then, yet jaemin has never stopped thinking about him. it doesn't matter: jaemin's secondary, his secondary, their places in life at this moment. he will always be jaemin's obsession.
supportive friend OPEN
- omega, any
someone that jaemin met early on into his new life alone in the city. they helped him get back on his feet and acclimate to his new omega status while also not taking any of his bull, which helped jaemin grow out of the ist and unhealthy beliefs he was raised with.
different (good or bad?) CLOSED *son naeun
- alpha, sol pack
this is someone that jaemin knew back when he was still the pride of the magnus sol pack, and also back when he had the personality of a mouthful of glass. they didn't really get along, but don't most rich, alpha kids not get along? it's been a long time since they've last seen jaemin, and of course he's very different now than he was back then.
heat relief OPEN
- beta, any
jaemin refuses to have an alpha as a heart partner and instead turns to betas and omegas to help him when he doesn't feel like dealing with it alone. this beta is one that has regularly assisted him on and off for years, which means they've also heard him delirious and ed out, calling someone else's name.
x's and exes OPEN
- omega, female, sol pack
a wealthy and well-connected omega that jaemin dated for a time when he was 19/20. it was not a good relationship. jaemin saw omegas as beneath alphas back then, and the way he treated her was unacceptable (often speaking in deragatory ways, ignoring her wants/needs, etc.). it also didn't help that he clearly wasn't interested in her when he was seeing his alpha at the same time, but kept her by his side for appearances.
rock the boat OPEN
- alpha, male, sol pack
you're the alpha whose jaemin rocked at that fancy gala years ago when he had an episode of ferocity in public. the two of you haven't seen each other since then, until now. did the event scare you enough that you're nervous of him? or did it stoke a need for you to get revenge after being humiliated in such a way?
- alpha, male
the alpha that jaemin was involved with back in his old pack and the one that also ed him into the omega that he is now. they haven't seen each other since then, yet jaemin has never stopped thinking about him. it doesn't matter: jaemin's secondary, his secondary, their places in life at this moment. he will always be jaemin's obsession.
supportive friend OPEN
- omega, any
someone that jaemin met early on into his new life alone in the city. they helped him get back on his feet and acclimate to his new omega status while also not taking any of his bull, which helped jaemin grow out of the ist and unhealthy beliefs he was raised with.
different (good or bad?) CLOSED *son naeun
- alpha, sol pack
heat relief OPEN
- beta, any
jaemin refuses to have an alpha as a heart partner and instead turns to betas and omegas to help him when he doesn't feel like dealing with it alone. this beta is one that has regularly assisted him on and off for years, which means they've also heard him delirious and ed out, calling someone else's name.
x's and exes OPEN
- omega, female, sol pack
a wealthy and well-connected omega that jaemin dated for a time when he was 19/20. it was not a good relationship. jaemin saw omegas as beneath alphas back then, and the way he treated her was unacceptable (often speaking in deragatory ways, ignoring her wants/needs, etc.). it also didn't help that he clearly wasn't interested in her when he was seeing his alpha at the same time, but kept her by his side for appearances.
rock the boat OPEN
- alpha, male, sol pack
you're the alpha whose jaemin rocked at that fancy gala years ago when he had an episode of ferocity in public. the two of you haven't seen each other since then, until now. did the event scare you enough that you're nervous of him? or did it stoke a need for you to get revenge after being humiliated in such a way?
7
out of character
part one. introduction
Hi! My name is Melo; you can call me by that or by my character(s) names. I live in GMT-5/EST and you'll mostly see me at random times throughout the day. I do work part-time (hoping to get a full-time job soon), so I'm not always available.
If you're interested in plotting or making a connection between our characters, please read the rest of this section!
If you're interested in plotting or making a connection between our characters, please read the rest of this section!
part two. roleplay preferences
POV & Length: I only use 3rdPOV. My replies can vary in length from semi to para to novella. I do my best to mirror, but don't feel pressured to do the same as long as you give me something I can work with.
Reply Speed: Just going to be upfront and say I'm a slow replier. Sometimes I can reply right away, but more often than not it might take me a day or two. If you prefer a faster pace I may not be the best writing partner.
Plotting & Winging: I prefer plotting since it gives me more confidence in my threads, but I am open to winging as well (and sometimes prefer it when my brain is being finicky). Sometimes I post random starters, so if they haven't been claimed by someone else feel free to respond!
Location: Rooms > Walls & Private Messages. I typically reserve private messages for OOC discussions, and rarely roleplay on walls unless I feel the need for our thread to be a little more hidden.
Reply Speed: Just going to be upfront and say I'm a slow replier. Sometimes I can reply right away, but more often than not it might take me a day or two. If you prefer a faster pace I may not be the best writing partner.
Plotting & Winging: I prefer plotting since it gives me more confidence in my threads, but I am open to winging as well (and sometimes prefer it when my brain is being finicky). Sometimes I post random starters, so if they haven't been claimed by someone else feel free to respond!
Location: Rooms > Walls & Private Messages. I typically reserve private messages for OOC discussions, and rarely roleplay on walls unless I feel the need for our thread to be a little more hidden.
part three. boundaries
Please do not "poke" me for a response. I don't make a habit of forgetting replies, and it's more liekly that I'm busy or struggling with my muse. That being said, if it's been more than two (2) weeks you can reach out to me.
If you plan to include any rated M or potentially triggering content in our threads you must discuss it with me first. I don't appreciate being blindsided and I will make sure to speak with you about including any such topics as well.
Regarding and romance; I don't typically roleplay these genres outside of my friends or those I'm very comfortable with, but due to the nature of this roleplay and this character I'm willing to be a little more adventurous than usual. (And I apologize in advance if my skills are rusty.)
If you plan to include any rated M or potentially triggering content in our threads you must discuss it with me first. I don't appreciate being blindsided and I will make sure to speak with you about including any such topics as well.
Regarding and romance; I don't typically roleplay these genres outside of my friends or those I'm very comfortable with, but due to the nature of this roleplay and this character I'm willing to be a little more adventurous than usual. (And I apologize in advance if my skills are rusty.)
part four. extra notes
If at any point you wish to change something in our thread or drop it altogether, please notify me! I will endeavor to do the same.
