kim jongin.

17 years of age.

january 14, 1997.

acrobat - contortionist.

 

Kim Jongin was raised to believe that his sisters were the better ones. His sisters were pretty, his sisters were smart. No, no one cared that Kim Jongin could do a headstand ever since he turned three, he was ignored when he tried to show his parents how he could support himself only using his teeth on a pedestal by the time he was six. No one cared that he had not taken any lessons or done any sort of practice before attempting these feats. Kim Jongin never excelled at school, in fact he was an outcast. He was bullied by day, and attempting stunts by night.

Then he saw a circus perform, he knew what he was looking for. This was the life he had been dreaming about. He packed his bags. Getting his mother's permission was simple, she was too caught up in his eldest sister's latest trophies to bother. Getting his father's permission was simple, his father worked in China and frankly, did not care what Jongin was up to. So he bid his family farewell with a smile on his face and left for the circus.

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Kim Jongin is better known as Kai now, Jongin was too forgettable. Too normal and too plain. Kai made an impact, it sounded beautiful as it rolled off his tongue. Kim Jongin was, and is, a high school boy with big dreams and aspirations. He is a high school boy searching for romance, waiting for the right time. He is a high school boy who doesn't actually go to high school. He is a perfectionist and will stop at nothing to achieve his goals.

Kim Jongin is also a mature boy but he falls hard and fast.

Also, he sometimes falls for the wrong people.

Kim Jongin and Kai are two very different people.

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Jongin suffers from depression. It haunts him every day and night. He is deluded by the figures that plague his dreams, he succumbs to the relief he knows as knives and rocks. He looks for jagged edges, for broken fragments of glass lying around. They aren't too hard to find, not with the amount of litter that is left behind wherever the circus goes. The cuts and scars left on his arms and thighs are easily covered by body mist, some of them are concealed by layers of makeup and others by his clothing. 

Kai suffers from nothing. Kai is strong and brave, Kai knows what he wants and stops at nothing to get it. Kai transforms himself as soon as he steps onto the podium. Kai is determined. It's almost as if Jongin and Kai are not the same person at all. They are just two souls in one body. But it is not so, it never is. They are still one person, just that Kai is charming and y and Jongin is shy yet determined to achieve something in life. Kai and Jongin are the same, because they are one person with one heart and one goal. They are different, because they just are. There is honestly no explanation for it. Kai never falls.

Jongin falls, though, every single night.