@krystal jung I...no, I was just--
-now I'm not sure what I was saying and feel like I've just been talking without listening to you or even myself. I stare at you with big eyes and am conflicted, visibly so-
Krystal, I was never implying that you couldn't take care of yourself. And I never...it was never my intention to replace you.
-looking down at my feet, my mouth open but unable to find the words to say, I just...nod. Dumbly. Then I look back up at you from under my bangs-
For what it's worth, I wish it hadn't ended the way it did. So...sorry, I guess.
-I give a little salute then, and, figuring I'm obviously not wanted here, salute you and hesitantly turn to leave you be-
@lee taegyun Were you not comparing them just a moment ago? No? You're so full of it, Daeun
*looks you up and down like I don't even recognise you, and for a moment, I don't, that scaring me more than anything else right now*
*rubs my arms in some desperate way to comfort myself when I hear you come out, glancing to the side and seeing how you hold yourself up*
So what if I get hurt? Not that it'll happen. God damn it, who do you think looked after me when there wasn't anyone else? When /you/ weren't there?
I looked after myself, I'm a big girl, I even tie my own freaking shoe laces now, Dae. So just cut the crap. Don't pretend like you care
Go and find your real friends, the better ones that replaced me. I don't even know you any more, and I hate it...
*whispers before wiping under my eyes again, crouching down and sliding off my stupid high heels, carrying them instead and now barefoot*
*gives you one more hard look, daring you to say something before I'm about to walk home, legit walk home just as I am right now*
Go home, Daeun...
*whispers as I look you in the eyes, now more around your height unlike before, my lips dried but still cherry red, parted and at a loss for more words now*
@krystal jung Explains the height...
-mumbles, grumbles, etc., and still follows you, desperate now. But I'm not sure why I'm desperate. Part of me thinks it's wrong to see you after years of silence and let you run away again, but another part of me is still mad and feels like you're just acting upset so /I/ can't be upset with you-
-though, in my subconscious I know you're not like that, even now-
-I pause when I see that you've begun crying, my own throat suddenly and impulsively tight at the sight of it, but I've always been good at swallowing stuff like that back when I need to. It's not my turn to cry and I certainly won't get emotional in front of you-
I'm not being ungrateful, I just--our lives are different. Like apples and oranges. You can't compare them anymore...
-but then you turn to make your leave and I'm standing there looking like an idiot, because I don't know if I should follow you or not. I hesitate, looking around for a familiar face and find none. That drink is sounding better and better by the second. But, with a defeated groan, I stalk out of the building and follow you-
-Trying to seem taller than I am so that you might take me seriously, and inwardly cursing that I never grew so that I could be taller than you for real, I shout-
Yah, Krystal! Don't run off like this! At least let someone take you home. You know I can't let you just run off if you might get hurt!
-a pause, a deep breath-
That much hasn't changed.
@lee taegyun Yeah, Jonghyun with at least three feet worth of insoles, so? What difference does it make who it was?
Don't tell me, you're looking to try and steal my friends from me now, the ones whom actually, you know, care about me
*hisses in return when you go red in front of me, thinking there's no real reason for you to do so if you had innocent intentions in all of this*
*widens my eyes, wondering if you even hear yourself, because from what you just said, the way I have to deal with things sounds much harder than your own*
I have to do everything you do, with a whole load of other on top, don't you dare tell me you think you've got it harder! And be grateful, that all it took was a few photos of you to get you where you are now
Don't sound so god damn ungrateful
*shakes my head as I can't quite believe this attitude from you, whirling around when you grab my upper up, glad you release it so I don't have to yank it from your hold*
What? What is it now?
*asks surprisingly shakily, not having realised I'd been crying up until now, feeling the tear roll down my cheek and gasping, wiping it off as quickly as I can*
I-I need to go
*mumbles as I turn away, almost tripping on my heels as I make my way to the exit, gasping as I reach the outside, closing my eyelids and resting my hand to my chest as I lean against the side of the building, gulping down the fresh air*
@krystal jung -I'm left reeling at the sudden change to English, not gifted with it being my native tongue like you are, scrambling to catch up and respond in kind-
That was Jonghyun?
-realizes belatedly that I should have recognized him, but I was too focused on you to even notice who you were hiding behind other than you might sic him on me and I knew I couldn't fight him off if he told me to back off. My cheeks flush a dark red as you keep going, feeling a little guilty but childishly refusing to admit my own fault-
No, no....I don't get it! You don't get it, do you? I'm just some chick that posts pictures of herself on the internet and does some modeling gigs for makeups and clothes! It's nothing like you. It's just been enough to get me some decent connections and, surprise, I'm a decent enough friend that I'm worth keeping around! I don't have to dance but I do have to starve and keep my private info hidden so crazies don't come after me and my closest friends!
-I open my mouth to say more and then you turn away from me and the scent of the perfume hits me like a er punch to the gut, leaving me breathless for a hot second before I impulsively move to follow you, wrapping my thin fingers around your upper arm, flinching away at the contact like I've been burned because I realize a line might have just been crossed-
Krystal...
-but I don't know what else to say, mouth hanging open with the words filling my mind that can't seem to find their way out-
@lee taegyun *sees your temper is still intact after so many years, shaking my head softly as although I'm on the receiving end of it, its something that has stayed the same which isn't like I can say that for the other things about us*
*watches as you walk closer to me and then back away, shifting a bit on my heels as you look at me like I'm some kind of alien, wondering if I look that different, ironic considering how different you look*
Hmph, you seemed worried about your image in front of Jonghyun, my label mate, does that just all go down the drain when you're left alone with me then? Figures... "explicit" - hah, what a joke
*ends up swapping into speaking English with you, something not others in the room are as fluent in, so a "safer" option for the both of us to be using now, considering things are coming out that have been suppressed for literal years*
*frowns when you sound like you're pinning this all on me, taking a step back from you as I honestly need the distance since I'm so horrified at what you've said and done*
Don't, don't you dare say that. I'm not the only guilty one here. What about you? Huh? Tried to follow me, like hell! You're the one rolling in circles of your own now, just as popular idols around you, if not more
Here I am, everything falling apart and you... you were never there, not once
You're famous now, you should know what its like with schedules, singing, acting, recording, dancing, no sleep, no food, people leaving left right and centre when you thought they'd be there for good, especially when you finally make it big...
*frowns deeply as I look back at you, my arms wrapped around my waist as I feel like something's lodged itself into my heart, my orbs even shimmering suspiciously before I turn away*
You know what, forget it Daeun, like you did before, or apparently like /I/ did
*turns away from you in a flurry of blonde locks and a perfume that smells suspiciously like the one you used to give me so long ago, on my birthdays, my heels surprisingly silent as I make a beeline for the exit*
@krystal jung No, it's...
-but I don't know how to explain that from you, it doesn't bother me, so I clamp my mouth shut and flare my nostrils with a little huff, my own face flushing at the memory of why we'd stopped talking, and I'm not blessed with anything to hide the visible manifestation of my flaring temper-
"After everything". Talkin' about it like it's...
-but I'm not sure how you're talking about it. My eyes flick to your labelmate when he asks what's up and I smile nervously, the line of my shoulders only relaxing once he's gone. I take a small step closer but being closer only accentuates that you're even /taller/ than usual in those heels, and I feel smaller than usual next to you so I retreat again, standing at a safe enough distance-
-when you show a visible facial expression, my interest is piqued, jaw clenching-
...dunno how to say it. A couple explicit words come to mind.
-I pause, mind scrambling for the right thing to say, reeeeally wishing I had that drink now-
How could you just...walk away like it was nothing? Like we had nothing? I thought it meant something, you know? And I tried, Krystal! I tried to follow you. But you moved too fast for me.
@lee taegyun *shifts to instead fold my arms under my chest, thankfully not needing to look at you for your appearance, having kept up to date with you when you made it big, knowing exactly what you look like*
*feels somewhat more uncomfortable than usual in the leather outfit I've been made to wear, the dress hugging my figure, my cheeks flushed a soft red but hidden beneath the make-up*
Whichever I want? Huh, thought I've had my head bitten off if I dared used your real name after... everything
Krystal is fine
*raises an eyebrow and glances back at you when you say its all over the posters, like I'm the only famous one out of the two of us now*
Oh I'm sure you're seen just as much, become quite the popular one, haven't you? Well, well done, of course. Guess I'm honoured to be up there with you
*glances back down when I hear your shoe scuffing the floor, seeing you're wearing sneakers and it only makes my body ache in envy, wearing heels on top of this outfit*
*shakes my head when my label mate asks if something is wrong, offering him a warm smile before he leaves us, my orbs finally settling back on you, daring to find and hold your gaze*
*sighs and lets my hands fall to my sides, frowning and for the first time looking back at you with some old emotions on my face, real ones and not just the ice princess*
Look, you've obviously got stuff to say to me, so go ahead and say it...
@krystal jung -chewing on my lip while I wait for some kind of response, I keep glancing up at the much taller man and smile sheepishly at him, hoping this isn't a bad first impression. Other than you, I had yet to make real acquaintances with SM, and I wasn't sure if I could call you even an acquaintance right now, given that we'd been avoiding each other for so long-
-I can hear a mumble and perk up, but shrink back when you whip around like that, unable to meet your eyes for too long and staring at the cross resting against your pale skin instead-
-my nose shrinks at the tone of your voice and I finally flick my gaze back to your face, slowly shrugging my thin shoulders, feeling like a caricature now in men's clothing, wondering if you had known when I'd started dressing like a man, as well as behaving boyishly. Did you think less of me now that I looked like this?-
You can call me whichever you want. I assume you still go by Krystal....it's all over the posters of you up at the mall.
-can't help but grumble, scuffing the side of my sneaker against the floor, feeling like I needed a strong drink-
@lee taegyun *runs my fingers through my hair, worrying over my appearance for some reason, hoping that if you should see me, I at least look good enough to /be/ seen*
*sighs before I pat my hands down on my outfit as well, scrunching up my nose before I glance to the side of my label mate, eeping when I catch another glimpse of you*
*shakes my head as I'm not ready for this, frowning and wondering suddenly why I have to be hiding from you, my little hands turning into fists at my sides*
...No, I'm not hiding any more
*mumbles before I smooth my hands out against my hips, shaking my head and tucking my hair back behind my ears, turning around with such force it just sends my hair whirling around my shoulders and for the cross on my choker to jingle*
*looks you dead in the eye as I stand before you, all that sudden frustration now lost as I look back at you, at a loss for what to say to someone I feel so many things for*
*clears my throat, trying to keep up that masquerade of being an "ice princess", one of my hands falling deftly against my hip as I look back at you*
Daeun, or should I call you Taegyun now?
*tilts my head up to try and reinforce that haughty attitude that really isn't me, trying to avoid your orbs as I look to the side knowing I'll cave if I do that much with you*
@krystal jung -I was at least 99% sure that I had seen you when I was stepping just off the stage, but everything is such a whirl during a fashion show that I couldn't be certain. It wasn't until I got to the party and recognized the outline of your body (that sounded creepier than I wanted it to) that I was assured it was, indeed, you-
-I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about that, and couldn't quite get through the crowd to reach you. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to. But, when I turned to take something from a server and someone knocked into me, that decision was made for me for the 2.3 seconds we shared eye contact before you ran away-
-I hesitated and then started to weave my thin body past the throngs of rich and famous, stopping when a taller man stood in my way, well aware that you were behind him-
...Krystal?
@lee taegyun *declines the alcohol offered to me, doubting I would be able to stomach it since I'm not feeling too good, not since earlier when I had a shock from the past suddenly appear*
*instead opts for a glass of iced water, sighing as I sip from it before walking around the party a bit, long having been departed from the other girls by now*
*roams around a little, smiling at the familiar faces I see before I nearly bump into someone, apologising softly with a polite bow of my head before blinking at who it is, my eyes widening*
Ah--
*quickly takes cautious steps away from you, almost dropping my glass no less as I turn on my heels, literally and slide between the numerous bodies, on my way to where you aren't*
Oh god...
*whispers as I shakily discard the glass on a passing table, wrapping my arms around my waist as the sick feeling intensifies, taking shelter behind one of my taller label mates, ignoring the weird glances I get from him*
Keep it calm princess, she's gonna disappear pretty soon. Just pretend everything is okay, everything is a-okay...
*mumbles but I know it isn't true, peeping over the man's shoulder in the attempt of seeing you, letting out a squeak when I do and quickly ducking back down*
Hanbin enters a random club by himself, absolutely new to the neighborhood. After looking around and seeing the chaos, he decides this is not where he wants to be right now. "Why do I always get lost on my first day in a new place?!", he huffs out, exiting the club.