okay so,

it's only 1am here but yall made me explode n cry like a as it became sept 7th in my time.

first of all i'd like to thank the people that posted in yellow usernim's padlet, and also yellow for actually making that thing wow me ( ily ). i wasn't expecting people to actually remember my birthdate, but you guys did, i would drop such a long sentimental post if i wasnt the mess i am right now. wow damn im so happy that my eyes are sweating. i don't know how to thank you guys srsly, even those people that aren't really close to me managed to wish me a happy birthday, and well, i hope that we will get closer in the future bc the past and what happened there. one certain user told me that they disliked me at first bc i was cracky and hard to understand, but then they started to get to know me, and i was deeper that they ever imagined, honestly i lived 20 years of my life to hear this, thank you. 

also to all the people i've ever hurt, i never mean to hurt you and it's not because i dislike people or /you/, i dislike the situations, but not people ( unless you legit up and break the heart i barely have okno ily ), this expired milk right here will be a better person, and will rehabilitate from traumas. 
also, for those who are legit bothered by my crack, im naturally loud and positive, i'm here to bring you at least a little smile and to forget about that emo happening in your real life okay? but, i can be also the shoulder you might need. like- come on, not everybody can be calm and decent c':

once again, i'm crying guys, like wow tears of joy, i couldn't stop reading the nice things you all posted, i'm not going to exaggerate, but thus far, this is my best birthday. why? because you all brough your point of view, your positive vibes, your kind wishes in this one day, that probably mean nothing for most of you, but for me, not it's something that i will always remember. 

roleplayrebulic is not toxic, it's a nice place, but people should start offering more love and affection and stop the talking, srsly, don't judge a person only because they are 'popular', it's also the clique you all invented. there aren't popular people, but those who are willing to accept every single person with their flaws. in this year, i will start working on it, don't hesitate to approach me even if you are afraid of me ( bc i know you guys are, even the walls have ears :D ), or because you think i'm out of reach. i'm not. 

i love you guys, thank you for the padlet, and for giving me a family here. sometimes, this is the place that makes me forget how hard my life s me in reality.

here's the best present in my life btw
like who the wasted their time on me wow, i was legit so damn sh00kt and even now, after a while, i'm smiling like a ing idiot wowza, my moms prolly calling the exorcist already gtg.

also ignore the damn typos not like yall are surprised : D

also heres the layout i coded for myself