I’m sitting in darkness cuz my ing batteries for my ing string lights aren’t ing working and I can’t sleep in the ing dark. My ing phone is in retarded af and I wanna break the in thing. Like legit just bend the ing thing until it ing snaps. Something I wish someone could do to me so I can die. Just like snap my spine jsy
I want to feel pain. I wanna beat the out of somebody. I wanna ing kill somebody tbh. I wanna in see blood.
But I also just wanna ing scream and cry and disappear from the world
And I have N O I N G C L U E W H Y
Maybe it’s cuz I’m going over a month since I last took my meds. Maybe it’s cuz I’m tryna be something I’m not. Maybe it’s cuz I’m tired of being the nice person when in reality I’m a who honestly wants to tell everyone to go themselves.
And yet...there are some that I actually genuinely like and have been complete sweethearts and have been there for me and I feel like pure for feeling this way even towards them.
And I wasn’t like this earlier today...I’m tryna listen to music and read and it’s not working. I’m too worked up to rp. I had two big cups of vodka and that hasn’t done . Someone help me find ways to calm or in kill me please.
Like...why the can’t I be normal for once in my in life please omg for the love of all the higher powers in the universes.
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