Ever get that feeling...

Ever get that feeling that you're unneeded or unwanted. But you stay because that's just the habitual thing to do. And you don't want memories to be lost?
Well... 
...
It's time I got over that and just left. I've just got the courage to do... I have a feeling it will be hard and I might go back but...

I AM LEAVING FIREFOX AND SWITCHING TO CHROME. *sobs* THIS IS SO HARD. Firefox and all my history. And the pinned tabs. *sobs* I just can't. But firefox has been so slow and stupid with me lately that I just had to switch to chrome ;A;

On the other hand... 
I've had a lot of people talk to me, more than just the known ones, about leaving HG roleplay, or leaving the roleplay scene entirely. 
It hurts me to hear this because... Are we not enough for you?
This roleplay is our bond, our mainline of communication regardless of other lines of communication that have been made.
I've been roleplaying for years. And the bonds I've created are always in my heart. Some people that just because a person has left or the roleplay shut down or I left that those memories are as good as gone no. I remember everything. To this day bonds that were torn apart or ceased are still in my heart. And I think about them a lot. Whether it was recently, 1 year ago, 2 years ago, 3 years ago, or more. I remember. (yes I really have been roleplaying for a long time... but I just started kpop roleplaying like almost 2 years ago I think)

I hate to see you leave. Because regret has filled my heart from leaving bonds through out these years. So much that some even want to bring years to my eyes. But with all this happening, I don't feel like begging and pleading anymore. I tried. I've said it more than once. But I won't beg and plead anymore...

My first KPOP roleplay was KBBE which holds its portal on AFF but is FB based. It's your normal 1st pov roleplay. I got a roleplay advertisement on my AFF account wall one fine day (this was before roleplay advertisement was overly common) in Novemeber of 2011. I was one of the first members to join and I stayed at the roleplay for over a year. I joined as Leeteuk. I made so many bonds there. So many friends. It really hurt to see so many leave as time passed, some just up and disappeared. Later on, I also joined as Kim Myoungjae and made many friends as well. At one point I was admin there too because I was always adding newbies to groups and greeting everyone. Sadly I became inactive but I pressed on to stay because of all the bonds and friend there. I did once become active again. But I disappeared one day. Because I was getting more and more into a certain third pov roleplay of mine that it consumed my life...

And that's where I bring myself to HG roleplay. Back before I was into KPOP I roleplayed a lot. And I only joined fighting 3rd pov roleplays. I had watched the Hunger Games and had already read two of the books by the time an HG advertisement plopped on AFF account wall. I immediatly joined. This was my first 3rd POV roleplay in a long time and I believe also my first AFF roleplay. 
Sadly one week in the admin disappeared, and so did the roleplay page. Everyone was so confused and things were dying. In that short week my life had been consumed and I could not allow the roleplay to die. I just could not. So I made a blog saying that I would take over if people would back me up. I got good response from the same two co-admins(Sulli, Minho) I have and a few others who stayed with us for a long time (IU, Minzy), and some still with us (Dara, Dongwoo). I opened up the new roleplay with my own touches. Throughout time, the roleplay has grown and changed even more. We're basically a para roleplay now, with a whole lot of multi-para roleplayers. We're heavily structured which makes us very unique.
I have to say I have made a lot of friends here. I have texted like 6 of the people, I have spoken on the phone with one, I've skyped with about 7 or more. I've tinychatted with omg... like maybe 8 of them... I have become intimate facebook friends with nearly 20 of them. Even those that I've only communicated within the boundries of the roleplay I have become close friend with. I would not want want to lose a single one of them. And I wouldn't want them to lessen or break such a bond.
Heck We even helped Jason make this site with our ideas and help! *smug-face* If you saw his blog on AFF he specifically thanked us *^* so many feelz.  Right here bishie. Right here: http://www.asianfanfics.com/blog/view/389309
 

Anyway, my point is that leaving is not just about leaving a roleplay or giving your self some space. It's leaving a world of friends. I know... there are now maybe other lines of communications for some of us, but really think about when you go to a different school than your friends or you move to another town or state or country. You slowly (or quickly) start to drift apart. Sometimes it takes awhile for the drifting to happen. But if not kept together the drifting always happens... 
So please think about it before you leave. 
Also so there are so many people I want to give a shout out too. Not just from HG rp (though I gotta say I got a million people there to shout to), but also a few from other roleplays here. And not to mention KBBE that I am no longer apart of (I tell myself everyday I'ma rejoin but OTL regrets). But those shoutouts... whole other blog there xD