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AuthorBlackRabbit
Created

Or lack thereof.

Look, I'll just say this for the umpteenth time, I feel like I need to be vulnerable now so just--- no gifs or cute fonts or polls. For the love of everything, just do you. Do you. Be you. You're you. It's a concept I've carried on the wings of my shoulder blades for as long as I can recall. Anyone who knows me is well aware that I'm a creature of impulse and erratic emotion, so I've no room to judge.

 

BUT...

 

One of the biggest, most important things that no one seems to understand is this: communication... Or basically "say something, I'm giving up on you". I swear I'm not a malevolent person. I like to be reasonable, to know when I've screwed up. In fact, the biggest detriment to my success is myself, only because I'm a total jerk to none other than ME. Mistakes that I make weigh heavily on me and I make it a point to beat myself up about the smallest things for weeks... I'm a micromanager on one end--- equal parts sadist/masochist on the other. Why am I telling you this? Because I realize that the biggest thing with this site is lack of proper communication.

People run from their problems so quickly instead of confronting or trying to salvage them... And if they DO face them, it's in the most potent form of "pity partying" I've ever witnessed. All for the sake of what? Compliments? Saccharine-coated assurance? Emo-revival? I don't understand. Why the hell is it such a fad to binge-block? To spread rumors and play petty games? The "indirect" effect is far more obvious than you think... What happened to being big kids who can say outright in a civil PM "Hey... I know you may not have meant it, but you kind of pissed me off that one time..." or "You don't really have the best reputation in my book, but I know I'm only going about this on one side. So lemme hear yours?" What happened to talking things out? I can't tell you how many friendships I've witnessed falling apart over the most trivial things... Most of which, I've been in. 

So like...

What happened? Why are we all such cowards? I can tell you that I'm a lot like ramen... Seasoned with flavors of condescending snark and lackadaisical amusement, but that's not ME as a person. If you tell me outright that you have a problem with me, that I've wronged or hurt you, that you just NEED something I'm a mature enough user to work it out. Would I get defensive? It's something I'm catching myself on, especially if I disagree. But I work it out all the time... I come back, I apologize. I settle things and iron them out because leaving things to float is awkward. And you know what? I forgive, forget, move on... Because like one of my last blogs said, I don't like letting things on RPR or online in general get to me too hard. We've all got more to do with our lives than fret over these masks we keep wearing here.

So just... talk to me. Let me know that I've upset you. Let me know that I went too far or did too little. "Vivaldi, you never finish our rps." I can admit to that. "Hey, you keep ignoring me in rooms sometimes..." That's probably something I can explain. "I wish you handled that one situation differently." Me too, probably. Let's talk about it.

 

I'm done with this, really. I promise you, this sorta thing actually goes so much farther. I plan on remaining on this site for quite a while longer, so don't think a bunch of things I keep hearing from others will deter me. I want to fix. But I can't fix what you don't want to be fixed. The irony in rumors is that they spread. The fault in the "blocking" system is that I have 2332847324 accounts on this site (not really, but tons), many of them are used... And you've only steered away one. Don't high-tail it like the White Rabbit... The only thing "late" was this blog post.

 

We need to re-learn how to fix things.

Comments

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e4ad60439867606452ec 8 years ago
running away is me. there's so many bad things about me .. but I can never say them aloud , otl.
JCH21753 8 years ago
I dunno... may have been people's cultures?
I know I was raised to not be... as direct as "You pissed me off and this is what you did."
Someone pisses me off, I just make a mental (maybe visual) note of it and carry on.
Nor do I much care about people having bad reputations according to me.
If I deem someone as having a bad reputation, it's either because I've seen their bulltery first hand, or I've heard about it firsthand from a trusted source.

All this mass-blocking of people is petty and immature, and possibly a futile grasping at the control these people don't have in the real world.
Takes a reeeallll big pair of bloomers to click a few buttons and ban that which is displeasing to the (faux) royal "feels," I'll tell you what.
[Particularly when the blocking... or ejecting from RPs... comes without warning and as a result of a comment or opinion that the ban-ner disagreed with.]

This isn't Tumblr, y'all.
You are not right all the goddamn time.
Your OOC opinions and viewpoints don't magically hold more weight than everyone else's simply because you run the RP or you silently block everyone you disagree with.

If you have problems with me, come on, let's talk about it.
But don't think for one second that I will lose any sleep over someone blocking me.
If I have a problem with YOU, I'm not going to be "that person" and just block you.
Or spread rumors about you or tell all my friends about what a nasty suspicious person you are or play games.
I probably won't talk to you about it, but hey.
Nyan_Jeff 8 years ago
Woah... That is actually true!!
I hate when I get in these kinds of situations, especially with people I see everyday
I'm definitely going to screen shot and send this to them <3
mangos 8 years ago
I definitely love you for this, and you couldn't have said it any better. I wish i could re-share this onto my blog, I wish it was an action this site could provide. OTL I know where you are coming from. Me, myself - I learned a lot of . I was immature, and I always made blogs indirectly at people that were rants. I never went up to them in person (aka pm) and talked about it. That, right there, was the most immature thing I could ever do, and I realize that. My last rant/indirect blog went at an all time low, because I didn't think about the consequences it would put me in. People who didn't know looked at me like some kind of , or crazy - looking for attention and sympathy, support, whatever. I wasn't looking for any of those things. I wanted to let others know that it wasn't okay to do those things, and yet people took it as me being a whiny . I don't blame them, and looking back on it now, I was, but I was also trying to get a point across that nobody seemed to see or care about. The only thing they did care about was me looking like a psycho, and that hurts. However, I taught myself to be a little more direct.
epsilon 8 years ago
preach woohoo
sunshinesmile 8 years ago
Babe if you ever need an open ear or just someone to rant to you know I'm always here and I'll always listen because honestly this is a thing people should think about. Not only for like five minutes but for a whole day because it's important
whatthefuk 8 years ago
is this about me? otl
glitterassgaysparkly 8 years ago
sweet lord
jesus
tell me about it
i wish people would just be mature enough to talk it out, i absolutely hate how they indirectly talk, bash, and refuse to just talk it out with the person
the only thing that can make one better than other is knowledge so we might not be better than each other ever.
and respect, respect saves you which comes with maturity
but no, we have too much childishness going on these days. i dont know why is it so fun for them to curse and out someone so easily, like you are talking to a person not a doll who doesnt have a feeling
i wish people would first think twice about their words. how would you feel if someone said those words to you? but they dont
they just say the without thought
SeHYUNG 8 years ago
Babe, you could never hurt me ;;;
<3
I also would never say anything terrible about you
lucky4432 8 years ago
you have summarized literally my first response to every problem that someone brings to me
talk it out even if it's scary--
it's something that's hard to do but yes--i'm with you there.
BUT the worst thing is when you try to talk it out and you get piss babies who then think you're trying to talk them and ????
3ed9e3ac246d384a3289 8 years ago
"What happened? Why are we all such cowards? We need to re-learn how to fix things." this hit home so hard vivi i -
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