When I was younger, it took a lot to realize that sometimes you have to let things go. People, actions, everything... All except yourself. Sometimes people aren't meant to befriend people, no matter what you've done for them. Sometimes things happen for a reason, and you're then given a season to make the most of it.
And sometimes, you make mistakes.
I've admitted my faults on numerous accounts [not literally... like in terms of RPR accounts, but in terms of instance] and that doesn't evade me even now. In the happenstance you, like most of RPR, should stalk a few blogs, I want to clear up one thing.
I never, ever will go back on my belief that I am a wonderful admin. I love making the atmosphere enjoyable for those I am with and I devote more time than I probably should towards embellishing a place of fun and creative endowment. I love being a part of that process wherein people meet people, wherein they make friends and come out of their shells... Like a parent watching a daughter or son find their first friend in kindergarten... I truly believe it's a comparable feeling.
But likewise, I am human. And I make mistakes. I'd once said before that my mistake was pressing the button. That, even though the whole admin team discussed it, I was the one who ultimately deactivated a character that we felt needn't remain in our rp. I'm not stooping enough to list usernames or even give away the rp, though I'm fairly certain you can guess. At the time, I felt that I could have slowed down, that I could've dished out a warning or so in the midst of the chaos that was my PMs. But I acted rashly and for that I do/did apologize.
But now...
I see that my/our actions were of no dubious intent. My decision was only verified even further by these previous events, and as someone who's honestly rather tired of all of this, I have to say...
1.) Let it go.
It happened nearly a month ago. It's over. This is the reason I make blogs like this... To ground you all into realizing that this is just a site filled with people seeking to shed some of their creativity and indulge in a world of kpop that their real-life friends or family might not understand.
2.) Step away.
Too many people have gotten involved, and I believe this is something that pertains to ANY piece of drama that flies about this site. Stop allowing hearsay to guide your judgements, don't allow the backlash of gossip to render your decisions. If impressions are truly so fragile, if people are honestly so quick to judge as if they, themselves, have never committed an act that they regret or are ashamed of then... I'm disappointed.
3.) Let it die.
Again. Drama will only live as you allow it. Like fire, it will only spread further, at the ankles of those standing in line to watch if they breathe into it further. We all need to take this back to where it belongs... In private. In the cases wherein this was exposed in the open, I do admit that those instances were unnecessary. I can be humble enough to admit that. Wrongs were committed, but as always--- these are wrongs from both sides.
4.) Stop dropping and rolling.
For some odd reason, there's been a trend wherein people think they can't be friends with everyone. They lump themselves into tight-knit "squads" or "cliques" and allow bias to ade them. What happened to taking a neutral stance? This isn't Bad Girls' Club or The Secret Life of the American Teenagers. Stop unfriending and dropping friends just because a friend you've known 2 days longer or happen to be getting from has beef with them. Why do we have to go so far to prove a "loyalty"? It's very simple... Just don't talk with each friend about one another. It's honestly not as big a deal as everyone makes it out to be. If people want to rant to you about it, refuse to listen or say your busy. Don't be so fickle, so terribly wishywashy that you will allow someone else's foul expression to taint your own. You've got your own mind, and this is the age of individuality (in a strange sense of conformity). Embrace that.
What's the point in all of this? I'm done. I don't give a damn what any of you think of me, as a person. I will continue to make amazing characters that seek progress beyond pretty faces... I want to commit to my RPR Revolution and remind people just how great this site is. I want to continue to make friends and spazz around on this silly site while I still have the time and capability. So I will NOT allow drama and fits to ruin this for me.
I've laid down my peace, I've honestly gotten over so much in the past few months. Last fall, this sort of thing would have broken me. Last fall, I'd have abused the clear bottles of numbness I had stored for just these occasions. Back then, I would've made sure I didn't have to keep breathing if it meant being judged by people behind a screen who don't know me--- don't know my life or my journey, who are letting one damn event and one small instance ruin their perspective. I'd have lost faith in community.
But I'm different now. Now I'm letting it slide as I did. Now, I'm opening up. I'll give you my KKT. I'm not averse to discussion... But if you weren't a part of this from the beginning, or if you've no personal animosity or such towards me, I kindly ask that you don't delve any further. This has gone on long enough... Guys, it's time to grow up and move on... To get over something instead of making a martyr out of it. No lives were saved in this, no worlds changed.
This is only a site.
This is only a site.
This is only a site.
And you all have better things in your lives to worry about... Go kiss your mothers on the cheeks or spend a second outside to bask in the rays. Do something productive, not destructive. Go live while you can and be glad for it. I know I sure am...
Because "hurt people hurt people" and we're all a certain flavor of insanity trapped in a cycle.
So let's be flawed together. If I build the bridge, we don't have to hold hands so long as we can get over it.
Comments
You must be logged in to comment.