studio

@✦ hyunwoo s. /there's a moment where i almost hesitate to come toward you, though when you look at me and call me so sweetly, i put off the fear that you may be getting tired of me and step closer, coming to sit on the bench next to you; placing the bag in my lap, i brush my fingers over it before pulling out a granola bar first, my eyes wide as i look up at you and blink a few times while offering it to you
you're silly, for coming here before eating. you need some type of energy to keep going, you know...

@✦ changkyun i. *once i arrive at the gym, a small one that our company maintains for their idols, i'm relieved that it's quiet, most people wisely still sleeping. i get down to work immediately after i stow my bag in a locker, plopping down at my preferred weight bench, grabbing some free weights so i can focus on my arms. when i hear the door click, i don't even look up, assuming it's another member of our company who wants to get an early start like me. your deep voice takes me by surprise, and i glance up, my heart melting once i see you standing there with a small bag, offering me breakfast* kyunnie - *your nickname leaves my lips so naturally, i don't even realize i've said it* come here - *doing my best to suppress my fears that you might prefer wonho to me, i place the weights i've been using on the ground with care, patting the bench next to me* come here, baby

@✦ hyunwoo s. /opening my mouth to say something when you say good morning to me, nothing ends up coming out as i fumble, watching you leave without any sort of looking back, and once kihyun looks at me as the door shuts, i stand up
i’ll just... i’ll go bring him something...
/mumbling about food, i shove some breakfasty type foods into a bag to take with me, and once i change i head out to go to the gym where i assume you are, nibbling on my cheek as i step in and look around for you, calling out quietly
hyunwoo... i brought some breakfast for you...

@✦ changkyun i. *when i wake up after a restless night of sleep, i can hear movement in the dorm, and i know most of the other members must be seeking out some breakfast. needing distance so that i can think, i throw on a pair of sweats, pulling on a tshirt and a hoodie, standing before my door, my hand on the knob, muttering to myself, building up my courage before i swing the door open, marching down the hallway, my workout bag in my hand. pausing in the doorway of the kitchen, i see you sitting there, and i mumble good morning. turning to kihyun, i tell him i don't need breakfast, and with a wave, i leave, heading to the gym, hoping i'll be able to get my emotions under control while i workout.

@✦ hyunwoo s. /heading back to my own room is hard enough when i know that i’ve finally gotten used to spending nights with you, and yet as i head into my room i know i wont get any sleep, either; there’s not much that comes of my time in bed, and soon enough the sun is up and i groggily make my way from my room to the kitchen, slumping down at the table while waiting for some form of breakfast to come my way once kihyun wakes up, needless to say that he’s surprised im up; hesitant, i keep glancing toward your room, wonderin if i should wake you for food, or if i should go in there to spend time with you, but in the end i just sit there, unsure what to do

@✦ changkyun i. *unable to sleep, i freeze when i hear the door open, knowing it must be you. trying to breath evenly, i feign sleep, not sure if i'd be capable of talking to you without relieving that i'm upset. when i hear the door shut behind you, i exhale, rolling over on my back, staring at the ceiling. part of me wants to run across the hall to your room and pull you into my arms, but the image of you and hoseok together flashes across my mind, and, instead, i sigh softly, rolling over on my side again, my eyes unfocused, wishing i could sleep, hoping that tomorrow will be a better day*

((if you want to time skip to the next morning, that works for me ^^

@✦ hyunwoo s. /after a little while of fooling around, and hoseok announcing he’s going to go to bed, everything gets quiet again as i lay there on the floor, not quite sure what to make of everything; after a while, i rise from my spot, deciding to head toward your bedroom where i test the knob before opening it, but when i see the lump in your blankets and assuming that you’re asleep, i hesitate for a moment before i quietly shut your door with just a click and head to my room with a sigh, wondering why it feels like something is off

@✦ changkyun i. goodnight, kyunnie *remaining in my place, i can tell that you're linger by the door, but, eventually, i hear your feet retreating down the hall, returning to the living room, and it's not long before the sounds of roughhousing fill the air. sighing, i slowly rise to my feet, shuffling over to my bed. stripping down to my boxers, leaving my clothes a crumpled mess on the floor, i slip into my bed, turning my face to the wall, presenting a giant lump buried in blankets to the rest of the world. i suddenly remember that i didn't lock the door, but i'm too disheartened to get out of bed. shutting my eyes, i pray for sleep, hoping that i won't dream about how happy you and hoseok looked as you where playing in the living room, the sound of your giggles like a dagger in my heart*

@✦ hyunwoo s. /the sound of your voice, i mistake the only dip in your voice as tiredness rather than the emotions i cant tell you have, and when hoseok calls out to me, i turn away from the door to tell him to give me a minute before i stand there for another moment, my fingers poised over the doorknob as i contemplate joining you anyway, though i back off with a soft sigh
sure, hyunnie. make sure you get lots of rest, okay? i'll see you tomorrow.
/staying there for a moment, i linger, as if i would hear you tell me to come in anyway, though after a moment i shuffle away, heading back into the living room with hoseok and talking quietly with him before we divulge back into our play fighting, mostly to cheer me up

@✦ changkyun i. *as i lean against the door, my back pressing against the hard wood, i can hear your footsteps approaching, gradually growing louder as you near my room. my mind spinning, i know that i don't want to face you with my emotions on edge. when you knock on the door, i don't stand up, and my eyes slowly shut when i hear your soft voice. swallowing hard, hoping that my voice sounds natural, i respond softly, choosing my words carefully* i'm sorry, kyunnie - i'm exhausted. i hope you don't mind but i really just need some sleep. can we talk tomorrow? *waiting for you response, i can feel my heart pounding in my chest, and it sounds so loud to me that i wonder if you can hear it through the door. covering my face with one of my hands, my shoulders slumping, all i can do is wallowing in my despair, comparing myself to hoseok, finding myself lacking in every way*

@✦ hyunwoo s. /having been spending more and more time with the other members, especially with how busy you've been and the lack of things i've had to do, i didnt really think of how everything would begin to effect you, not really making much of it myself; when you came home, i was unaware of even the sounds, simply trying to get wonho off of me while we fooled around in the living room, a play fight that started all with an argument over the remote, and as i giggled and tried to hold my ground, i just barely caught the sound of your bedroom door closing; calling wonho off of me, even in the midst of laughing and giggling like a madman, i gave up possession of the remote and managed to get free, calming down and sitting on the couch for a while to catch my breath before pushing myself up, heading over to your room where i knock lightly on your door, calling out for you quietly
hyunnie -- hyunwoo hyung, did you just come home? are you resting? aish, changkyun, you're awful if he really is resting...

@✦ changkyun i. *unlocking the front door of the dorm, i enter slowly, exhausted from filming my latest variety show. kicking off my shoes, i think to myself that it's a lot harder to do an individual schedule than something with one or more of my members. the day has been dull, seeming to drag on forever, and i got distracted more than once, getting a reprimand from the pd for not paying attention because i was lost in thoughts of you. glad to be home, i stretch, yawning wide, shrugging out of my jacket, the sound of voices reaching me from the living room. sliding my feet into my old, worn, but very comfortable, slippers, i slouch toward all the noise, ready to crumple into a heap on the couch for the evening, a smile curling my lips because i know i'll get to see you. entering the room, my body stiffens, my shoulders straightening, my eyes going wide because i see something that stops me in my tracks. i see you and hoseok wrestling on the ground, your giggles bubbling around the two of you, both of you are obviously having a wonderful time, oblivious to my presence. backing away, i trudge down the hall to my room, shutting the door behind me, my back pressed against it, my heart pounding wildly in my ears as i slump to the floor*