I wouldn’t go as far to say that, he’s lucky that I was able to grace his presence.
/The corners of my lips tug into a slight smirk as I direct my attention to you, arms wrapping over one another. I dip my head back, laughter spilling over before I move in closer to you, giving your arm a gentle pat. I realized that I wouldn’t have done much after I would of got home, so I couldn’t help and feel grateful of being whisked away for another few hours. It wouldn’t hurt anyway.
You ready to drink the night away, Austin?
@☼ : megan pete。 [] 6 days ago fveufges i'm so sorry bab
the night was winding down which meant the party had too. as i was getting ready to leave, i wasn't quite ready to go back to the suites yet, not when there was still so much night left. i managed to catch you before you left as well, and prompted you with an invitation, to which you accepted, to my surprise. about an hour later, after finally leaving the party, i was swaggering up to the bar, only for my devious grin to spread across my face upon seeing you, and i let out a howl of amusement, wolf whistling in your direction.
Well well, whoever you're waiting on must be one lucky guy.
my eyebrows wiggle playfully at my own joke as i strode up to you
@☼ : austin post。 /It was around ten at night, and I found myself rolling up toward the outside of the bar. But since I was invited, why not? I didn’t know what convinced me to wear what I was—a red jacket that shielded over my crop top, accompanied with jeans that only rode past my hips. I dip my head back along my car seat, staring up at the ceiling and I give my tongue a gentle click before leaving my car. My footsteps were gentle, sneakers running over every bump and crack on the ground. It didn’t take long until I reached at the entrance, back resting over the wall as then I stare at my phone and then at the space, waiting for your arrival.
@☾ : chanyeol park。ʰᶦᵃᵗᵘˢ every sign in the universe pointed at no. no to them speaking, no to them spending the night together. no to them even being within such close proximity of one another. yet they continue to defy each intervention, grasping at straws to try and be together, yet in vain. chaeyoung and chanyeol find their fates painfully intertwined, and it's like there's no end. there's no one to cut the thread that entangles them together, and even if she were to get on her knees and beg for some supernatural being to give her the indifference she desperately needed, she knew it would never settle in her heart. indifference was difficult when it came to chanyeol. she knew, because she had tried dozens of times. all attempts futile, chaeyoung halfway through had realized it was a cycle. 'don't say that', she thinks. 'don't say that you'll do anything for me.' but outwardly there's nothing but blissful ignorance, their fingers interlocked and an entranced expression wilting over her features. when would he leave her this time? in the morning? throughout the night? after he got breakfast and a sweet kiss? she doesn't want to know.
the doors to the elevators close shut and it's quiet for just a moment, the ride to the top feeling like an eternity yet a blink of an eye. their hands never part, but the tension is thick and it makes her drift into thought, in and out until the ding of the elevator draws her back. she tugs him to the direction of her suite, pulling on his hand as she waits for him to follow. "this way. i got a corner suite, lucky me." the smile on chaeyoung's face is indicative of her chosen ignorance, all shy smiles and little blushes. she chooses this route, to keep the veil over her head until it's lit into flames and tears her from her fabricated dream. they reach her suite and chaeyoung reaches into her bag for the key card, rummaging through wires and spare lipstick tubes until finally she fishes the key to her demise.
it slides the lock open a bit too easily and chaeyoung draws him nearer, closing the door behind them as she takes both his hands in hers. they were large, rough from years of instrument practice, yet warm and sensual when need be. squeezing them, chaeyoung glances at the neatly made bed and then focuses her eyes on his face. she didn't think she'd get this far. she thought he'd say no, that he was finally sick of their twisted game of cat and mouse, of push and pull, of sink and swim. yet now that she has him here, she doesn't know what to do. the urges to kiss him, to hold him, to embrace every hurt that he gave her and release it in some wild, sporadic fashion, they were all overwhelming. when they were dating, they never had a problem with intimacy. but the rift always brought them here, the awkward beginning. "you always did have a rough touch."
@☼ : austin post。 oh- uhm. you should let me know if you specifically want me to ignore that one but.. great warning. I never thought of putting that on your face. Like.. you know how at some times, you wanted to be left alone but you just don't want to offend people to the point that you have to just entertain their . i stares back at your offer about being my support if i ever thought of getting one before smiling gratefully. thanks for the offer and i do contemplate getting one but the problem is.. I still have no idea what I wanted to engrave on my skin. So that wouldn't happen too soon.
amusement fills up my entire facial expression and shakes my head playfully. i think we will pretty get along well. and also.. don't everyone love beer? It's a great gathering tool when I wanted to meet my friends. I will be like "is anyone up for beer" and in an instant, they will all gather. Oh, so beer is the way to your heart? I'd be sure to let an interested party know about this spicy tip. The bar isn't far? great. let's go! *takes out the phone to find the nearest bar*
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 selfishness; he just wanted to see her happy, with someone new. he just wanted to see her happy- that's all he had wanted. to see her smile back at him in which he knew was real- genuine, true and the entirety of her heart's weight behind the simple, but treasured sight. yet not once, had he seen the moment he had longed to see, not since they had chosen to walk away in opposite directions. chaeyoung smiled, but it wasn't the same- was it that the lens he viewed her in had changed its shape? twisted, out of focus, blurred, monochromatic, at the oddest angles.. she still looked like the girl with the broken smile- no matter the setting, lighting, the company- friends, family, and the occasional guy or two that he saw chasing after her upon scrolling through instagram. only to never reappear again, nor come up within their conversations, the times they met as 'friends', after some time. "anything, for you." he says to her in passing, with one last delicate kiss against her skin, retreating only to help make their leave, chanyeol possessively still keeping his arm around her.
they walk alongside each other, but not in unison, their pace never aligned- him always wanting to run; pace quickly away at the slightest distraction, while she had wanted to take things slower, to walk down the scenic trail, to notice and take in even the slightest bit of detail. chanyeol internally laughs at himself mockingly. why was it that even the most trivial things regarding chaeyoung became a reflection- a melancholy analogy, a set of proses that he would dare never say aloud, ever. their lack of dialogue honors this sentiment, even as they wait for the elevator. but luckily the wait isn't long, the two of them entering, the doors closing after them, trapping them together.
he's momentarily taken back to an alternate time- that time in which he saw a glimpse of the future, without her. he still remembers it clearly. baekhyun and him had been dressed up in their finest suits, out to celebrate the end to their grueling series of concert tours by treating themselves with the most expensive restaurant they had managed to find. but just like any other stupid ubiquitous, overplayed romantic movie; chanyeol had seen her from afar, laughing, enjoying her time with someone else. that night, he and baekhyun had ended up eating mcdonald's instead at his coercion of course, and his friend had nearly unfollowed and blocked him from instagram as a result. the sound of them reaching the floor is heard and the doors open, placing chanyeol back to the present moment. he guides her out, taking the lead. "which way to your suite?"
@☾ : chanyeol park。ʰᶦᵃᵗᵘˢ had they met in a different life, perhaps they would have lived together in peace, in love, everything that they could ever want. they'd have the picket fence dream, where they'd wake up in the stream of sunlight and goofy smiles on their faces. but they'd lived in a place where such happiness was unattainable to the two; it was an illusion that they'd dreamt for themselves without a basis of truth. chanyeol had always been stunningly attractive. handsome features, kind eyes, a warm heart when he wanted to come off that way. he had a way with words that made people swoon, no matter the circumstance. the way that he had entered her life was just as destructive and magnificent as the way he left it. without remorse and with lasting effect. "so then indulge yourself." playing devil's advocate was a dangerous game, she knew. but the way it tempted her to spend the night with him again, to feel his warm presence against her one more time, it was too enticing. the empty promise of company and affection drew her in far too easily. she wanted him to stay, and he wanted nothing of it. she wanted him to feel something, anything, and he didn't. it was too much to ask for, and although the two of them knew, it never went away.
chaeyoung leans into his touch and although it almost burns a trail against her flesh, she ignores the feeling and indulges herself anyway. "i don't wanna think about that right now." and she truly doesn't. because if she allows herself to be rational at this moment, then the best course of action to take would be to back away from chanyeol and cast him away into some bottomless void that she'd never visit again. but doing so would require so much heartbreak, and admittance. neither of which she was ready to deal with.
his touch is oh so familiar, the way his lips ghost over her skin and the way his fingers press into her waist. she wants more and more, greedy for everything that she can take. "take what you want, then. you were never one to hold back, chan." the nickname is bittersweet on her tongue, with the way it rekindles emotions she wishes she never experienced in the first place. yet the sweetness is a touch that eludes her grasp; it's just enough to make her want more. "come home with me. please?"
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 she was perfect for him- the ideal girlfriend that he had wanted; cute, y, charming, intelligent- and more- so much more. she literally had been his best effort, the latter naturally having possessed the capability to bring the best out of him- without trying. he hadn't need to, because from the very first time that he had seen her smile back at him, its ardor reaching all the way up to her brown, honey almond-shaped eyes, chanyeol had gotten all that he wanted. her spontaneous entrance into his life had been that of a magnificent meteorite; star struck- he was, mesmerized by the way at how her mere slightest presence could shed light and warmth into a world that was constantly plagued by darkness, desolation and chaos. with her, with chaeyoung, it was all the littlest things that he had come to appreciate- that mattered. the smallest, mundane things- the things that people took for granted- advantage of. the way she clutches; balling up the material of his shirt, chanyeol feels as if she's got a hold over his heart instead. "like i said," he responds ominously, his voice dropping an octave in pitch, letting the true, deep natural timbre of his voice to reveal itself. "you know i do."
their past; it had been too good to be true. the stars only shined bright like diamonds in the night sky because it was dark. with every ray of sunshine that broke through, the clearer the overall picture became- the troubled, hidden disaster he was, against the adverse, opposite that chaeyoung wasn't. she was the epitome of flourish, while he was analogue of disappointment. everything messed up, that she didn't need, if she didn't want to suffer. he hangs his head slightly, lowering it just until that his chin is hovering above her shoulder, as if he's going to push past her and just walk away. "you're going to regret this, aren't you chaeyoung.." chanyeol whispered into her ear, keeping a loose arm around her to have her right against him, but his other hand going to brush back a curtain of long, soft hair back, to fall behind the line of her shoulder- exposing her neck. "same perfume huh, you really haven't changed." he chuckled quietly, intoxicating his sense of smell with the familiar floral perfume that was fitting of someone named after a flower of love. nudging the tip of his nose gently into the crook of her neck, chanyeol nuzzled her lightly, barely ghosting his lips over the point of her pulse. "i want you in the worst way possible." he murmured, ever so faintly.
@☼ : chanyeol park。ʰᶦᵃᵗᵘˢ the silence that permeates and brews between the two figures is only more assuring that chaeyoung's words hadn't been empty attacks. they weren't aimed at him out of spite, to make him angry or feel guilty. rather, the two of them knew that it was completely true. chanyeol had issues with committing to one person and the idea of stability ruined him. it built him up unbeknownst to him, happy and elated as the memories flowed by. but when he realized what was happening, he'd tear through the layers until the both of them were raw with pain. chaeyoung at this point, only had herself to blame. chanyeol didn't implore her to stay. they could have parted ways far earlier than this. maybe if she had just been a bit more rational, they wouldn't be hurting each other in this way. it's because chaeyoung wanted this just as much as he did, if not more. she liked his company. she liked him. she liked the moment of comfort he provided her. she liked the way he held her and made her feel secure when she was anxious, or upset, or just needed the affection. chanyeol was there. albeit, perhaps she should seek a different partner if that's what she desired.
it was him that she loved, though, after much experimentation. "i do." she seethes, the words burning on her tongue. after so many years, she knew chanyeol through and through. "because i can't! god damn it, chanyeol. is that what you wanted to hear? i can't turn you away because i actually feel something for you and -- do you know how many times i wanted to just say it and throw you away like you did to me?" her anger almost subsides when she feels familiar arms around her waist, the poisonous warmth encapsulating her and the adoration she longed for spilling forward, but disguised. "you're not." is her weak response. it contradicts what she had just proposed moments before, she knows. to ask him such a loaded question is sure to backfire on her later. they'd spend the night together, share moments of passion, and then he'd be gone just as fast as he appeared. yet she indulges herself anyway. looking into his expressive eyes, the deceitful ones that looked so innocent and affectionate, she nods slightly and grips the fabric of his shirt in her fists. "i do. do you?"
he resented her, for how right she was, for all that she currently stood for, at how she pulled up the unsightly truths that he had so wished to desperately avoid. but there it was- hanging over their heads in a forlorn, clouded thought, forcing them atop of thin, thin ice; the facts beneath the surface exposed and brought to light, uncomfortably up close and personal to his dismay. the truths, that he had desperately wanted to avoid- wanted to escape, to forget, by resorting to isolation, away from her. it threatened to take over the both of them, drown them both into the icy cold tides that served as their perfect storm- disastrous and damaging. he loathed, he seethed. chanyeol hated how she was right- all the time. there wasn't an unsound reason to chaeyoung's words, he was guilty of everything single thing she said, but he refused to let her believe- let himself believe, that her side was untainted; of righteous and clarity. because although he had been the one to hurt, she too had let him in- once too many times. she too, had wanted this. chaeyoung as well, had played devil's advocate, and still was, even now, by inviting him to stay.
"sounds like you have me all figured out, chaeyoung." he said indifferently, shrugging slightly. "i guess i'm only sorry because i got caught- or that we're finally having this confrontation." chanyeol continued, going on to still speak with disinterest and carelessness. "but now that's been addressed, i just want to point out that you were the one to never turn me away, despite how i treated you like ." he smiles crookedly, his arms snaking around her waist to pull her in close. "you knew what you were getting into." he softly reminds her, warning her too, that she could still leave, while she had the chance, and pretend like nothing ever happened. "you already know my answer. but i thought i wasn't allowed to stay for long." he smugly replies, discerning the vulnerability she exhibits, chanyeol using their fragility to his advantage. he gazes into her eyes- his mind internally in a slight panic when the only thing he sees in them is sincerity, and hope. "do you still want to spend your night with me?.."
@☼ : chanyeol park。ʰᶦᵃᵗᵘˢ she knew well enough from the way her vision was fuzzing around the edges that the full force of intoxication was soon to come. chaeyoung could feel her head buzzing, her arms feeling heavier but light at the same time. the only thing that weighed more was her heart, with the way that his eyes told her he was cold and indifferent. there was nothing in this world that could ever compare to the pure, raw hurt that he had inflicted on her. and yet there was nothing in the universe that could ever compare to the encapsulating love that she had experienced while spending time with chanyeol. in retrospect, she should have never given him the time of day when they had first met. perhaps she wouldn't have been found in this situation, pining and trying her best to rip herself away from something that would hurt her in the end.
"you can, you're just too damn scared to. you like to around, have little commitments because you think that's what you do best. you think you aren't good at loving someone and that's all you know how to do." chaeyoung's accusatory voice is nothing short of livid. if anything, deep down she's glad that the liquid courage is enough to draw out the long suppressed anger within her. there's nothing more satisfying than purging the emotions she's kept inside her for so long, yet it releases itself almost explosively and even through her tipsiness she understands the repercussions of her outburst. she'll probably regret it in the morning, and he'll probably just leave her again.
it's the thought of him leaving once more that draws her nearer, enticing yet horridly aching. she leans in, hands going to his face. little glances shift to a contemplative gaze, her anger subsiding with the sight of his features. they had tried to love and he'd left her every single time. but maybe they didn't have to love, she thinks. maybe, as long as she got his company, they'd be okay. "you don't want to spend a night with me?"
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 hearing the seething tone of hatred absolutely entrenched in her voice, he knew that she was starting to suffer from the effects of intoxication. the latter wasn't one to get hot-headed so quick- so simply. that had been his role, every time their relationship had hit a wall. in retrospective thought, he wondered how they had lasted as long as they did, but then he remembered, opposites attracted- and chaeyoung in his eyes, was still as attractive as ever. "you are." he firmly tells her, looking her square in the eyes to argue his case, but regrets it as soon as he does, because he's weak; vulnerable and tempted, to repeat their existing history.
unwillingly, he drops his gaze, helpless to the ways in which she inexplicably gets to him- bothers him, irks him. time, distance, neglect, hatred- he's tried to put as many obstacles and barricades between the irrational feelings he still harbors for her, but it never ends well for him. he's tried to move on; see himself with someone new, but instead it was like chaeyoung had never left. it was always about her; sees aspects of her in them, compares her love to theirs, every single little difference and similarity that make up them, but not her. it drives him crazy. he's delusional- out of his mind, not being able to let go.. to continuously see her as his present, past and future.
"no, i c-can't." he simply tells her, and although his words falter a bit, he makes sure to leer down at her; impassive, his brown orbs struck with dark, heavy venom. "i can't love you." chanyeol's being honest to her this time, because he can't love chaeyoung. they had tried love- he had hurt her because of its presence. he wasn't going to do that to her again. if chanyeol truly loved her, he wouldn't.
@☼ : chanyeol park。 "i'm not drunk, ." chaeyoung retaliates with as much heat in her voice as she can muster, but it's a lie. she's starting to feel tipsy, her judgement impaired and her vision hazy. she always was a lightweight, he was right. she just wants him to shut up already. the way her nickname falls from those lips is intoxicating. she wants him to stop opening those pretty lips of his, to stop looking at her with those eyes that she had always sought out. "stop saying about me." and as much as she wants to seem strong and put up a front against him, she can't. the weakness in her knees is already making her lean against the bar, hand outstretched to grasp the back of his chair. the alcohol is suddenly seeping into her system, and she curses the way it chose now of all times to strike. why couldn't she ever win against chanyeol?
not since you, he said. for a second there's a glimmer of hope in her heart. did that mean he was as hung up on her as she was on him? did that mean there was a chance that he actually loved her? that he was just being an and he needed some time to himself to grow before he really knew how to love her? did that mean he was hers? chaeyoung falters and her gaze softens, looking at him with sorrow rather than hatred. the hope quickly morphs to disappointment and the accusing finger drops to her side, hand clenching into a loose fist to cope with the idea of chanyeol sharing his bed with another.
he stands and she has to slant her chin upward to look at him. it sickens her to see the way he seems so proud of his words, even though they leave their painful imprint on her heart. "you just can't ever let me win, can you? you always have to rub it in my face. i get it, chanyeol. you have girls everywhere -- i'm just your rebound." her fists clench harder and even though her fingernails dig into the palms of her hands, she bites back the pain and shoves him away. ". can't believe i spent so much time loving you." but she'd do it again, because that's what she felt like she was made to do. "you just can't be a decent guy for once. you can't just love me for once, can you?"
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 fighting, it was something they hadn't done in a long time, not since that night- their breakup, after chaeyoung had found about his mistake. the particular moment passed before his eyes briefly, chanyeol recalling how they had been that night, trying to remember if he had felt worse then, or in the present. some things hadn't changed; he hated who he was around chaeyoung- he hated hurting her. it was like torture, to see the inflicting effects his presence had on her, yet, it was like an endless, vicious cycle. he /always/ ended up hurting her. the latter was right- he wanted out. he had used her, he had taken all that he had needed; escaped, all without even so much as an explanation. but she was wrong about one thing; he loved her too.
the latter truly lived up to her name- rose, because the more he held on to her, the sharper the thorns felt. he lets out scoff that's spiteful, a grin that ridicules her curving onto his lips. again, his actions don't align. "now you say you regret it.." he mumbles quietly, rolling his eyes slightly. "is this the alcohol talking? are you drunk, chaeng?" he taunts, purposely referring to her by her nickname. "you should go to bed.. you were always a lightweight." chanyeol dismisses her, refusing all that she has to say.
he thinks back to the morning he saw her in the lobby. just when chaeyoung was turning into somebody whom was out of sight and out of mind, the latter had arrived- an uncalled surprise. one look, from a distance- that's all it had taken. he wasn't over her, still. nothing good was going to result from delving deeper into the wounds- pulling at it, picking it apart, just to get at the truth. he puts few bills down on the counter, paying for their drinks. "i'll take your suggestion; look for another girl to . haven't had someone in my bed for awhile, not since you, anyways." with a wink, he gets up from his seat, knowing that he's lived up to her expectations. unlike before, he's given her a way out. for once, he's not as selfish.
@☼ : chanyeol park。 the contrasting tone of his voice isn't foreign and she hates that it isn't. she hates that she knows exactly what he's going to be like, the words that he'll spit in her face and the nasty scowl that'll wash over his handsome features. he was going to rip her to shreds, unrelenting and without mercy, until she was left with no semblance of hope for their relationship. until he invaded her life again. "i think i deserve an explanation after running into you." she tries to bite back with as much venom dripping from her tone as she can, eyes scrutinizing with both hesitance and disdain. she wants it to be over, but this is the one chance that she'll get to show him just how severely he battered and bruised her in the past. she'd give him a taste of his own medicine.
but her resolve quickly breaks, her mask crumbling into minuscule pieces when his gaze darkens and she can feel his figure growing and growing, suffocating her in his presence. chanyeol suddenly seems so much bigger than he always had. she doesn't cower, because she has at least enough dignity to do so. a deep breath in and a deep breath out later, chaeyoung meets his eyes, and even though it terrifies her to her core, she doesn't break their gazes. "you get angry. you get irrational. you drown yourself so deeply in your emotions that you don't care what you do, who you hurt, or how do you it -- but you just want to get out. and guess who's /always/ there to help you feel better? me. it's always me. you use me however you want and you take whatever you want from me because i love you." after she stops, the silence is deafening. an accusatory finger presses into his chest and her eyebrows are knit after her tone had raised. chaeyoung feels like she's heaving, but her shoulders are shaking and she wants nothing more than to calm down and lay down, to feel comfortable. "you use me and it's not fair. you never loved me like i love you."
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 god, he hated how caring chaeyoung could be, just like that. it was his poison; her penchant, soft spot for him, willing to call out his name, in hopes to rekindle what they had before. before, when they had been in a healthy, committed relationship. now, they were broken up; damaged in different ways. the cutting, jagged edges of the fragments that they had both chose to hold onto, embedded and a part of them, continuing to flaw the whole concept of their undefined affinity. chanyeol let out a soft sigh, looking away from her- the slight touch of her fingers brushing against his vexing a feeling of deja vu. history was repeating itself, as usual. "don't ask me that, i came to get over them, not bring them up."
his emotions volatile, the tone of his voice comes off more cynical; rude and harsh, both of them being traits that chaeyoung wasn't deserving of. or in the contrary, she did deserve, if it meant that she'd finally walk away from him on her own, because he obviously wasn't honest nor acted true to his feelings. the thought lingers for a second too long, anger and frustration creeping their malicious intents into the fine chips and cracks that makes up his persona. "like what, chaeyoung?" he challenged quietly, his darkened gaze brooding over her. "tell me, say it." he continued. perhaps if chaeyoung could hear herself out loud, in person, of how much of a toxic burden he was in her life, then maybe, just maybe, the latter would call it quits. for his sake, but most importantly, for her sake.
@☼ : chanyeol park。 seeing the man at a seeming loss for words makes a sense of pride bloom in her chest. it's almost backhanded, in the way that she wished it wouldn't have to be this way. she wishes so desperately that they could share beautiful moments together. the way their fingers used to intertwine, the way they kissed and kissed until their lips felt numb and they were giggly from the lack of air. she wants to go back to when he used to hold her like she was the only thing that mattered. but with each illusion came more poisonous bliss. his love for her wasn't pure like hers was for him. it was tainted and excruciatingly painful, downright cruel. he held her close because she was easy. convenient. she made him feel good.
chanyeol was a man of large stature. every movement resonated with confidence and power. his build was wide; shoulders stretched back spanning across so much space that women fell at his feet so easily. he was tall, muscular, everything anyone could want. but she knew that when he consumed too much alcohol, he'd get needy. he was a man of many secrets, disclosed deep within his mind to not expose himself as someone who was so vulnerable all the time. chaeyoung pulls the drink closer to herself to obstruct his plans of downing her drink alongside his. "no, it's okay. i'll drink it." on the other hand, she wasn't so large. rather, she was petite and her waist so thin that it often hindered her clothing choices. when they were dating, people always had something to say about how the juxtaposition of their builds was a cute sight to see. it's too bad it's yet another feature of them both that reels her back to unwanted memories.
"i shouldn't have come. i should have just stayed home." chaeyoung doesn't want him to leave. she wants him to stay and realize what they could have, to start over completely with new hearts, pure feelings, and apologies. but for the better of them both, she refrains from saying so. "drink your feelings away? what kind of feelings do you need to drown in alcohol?" it's critical, the way she speaks. what kind of hurt did he have that he had to come here to drown his sorrows? he was the one that hurt her, not the other way around. in the midst of her abrasive thoughts, she instinctively stands to meet his looming stature, fingers wrapping around the glass he holds to pull it down and set it aside. their fingers brush and for a split second she thinks her heart jumps. her voice softens, vulnerable but caring. ".. don't drink like that. you know how you get."
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 her spiteful words stained his temperament with disdain. chanyeol was taken aback, unpleasantly surprised by the underlying tone of animosity that laced each and every word of the latter's. a crease formed between his eyebrows, his lips stretching taut- thin and uncomfortable. he then parted them slightly, about to answer her in his defense to her claims, but paused. he deserved such retaliation, after all that he had put her through. "you don't have to drink it if you don't want to." he began, hesitantly. "don't drink the rest, i'll finish it." he then added, after watching her take a second consecutive sip.
his eyes locked on hers, he could see how much she was on edge; the way she'd run her hands over and over again over the fabric of her dress out of nervousness and anxiety, how everything from her demeanor to her body language blatantly screamed for him to disappear, and never come back. but, all except for the look in her eyes- those beautiful pair of brown orbs that graciously preferred to see him in a better light. chaeyoung was a beautiful person inside and out; perfect, but that was precisely her flaw to him.
"i swear, chaeyoung.. i didn't know you were going to be here." he told her honestly, wanting to continue, to reveal that he had forced himself here in hopes to try and move on; finally let her go, but decided against it and kept the thought hidden when she brought up his promiscuity. "and of course i'm paying for the drinks- but sure, i won't stay for long." he nodded, knowing it was in his best interest to agree to her terms- especially if he even wanted to keep his hope of seeing her again soon any chance of possibility. "i actually came here to just -drink my feelings away, that sort of thing." he said, giving her a crooked smile, before raising his glass and taking big gulps of his drink.
@☼ : chanyeol park。 chaeyoung eyes the glass in front of her, fingers going to it after she downs the shot she had already ordered. it burns as it travels down , but it's still less painful than the memories chanyeol quite literally rips from her heart the moment her eyes laid on him. pushing the shot glass to the bartender, she takes the newly acquired glass and takes a sip, eyes never falling away from his. "long island tea, huh? you really want to get me ed up. what did you do this time?" she sighs as the added burn only makes her stomach coil in protest, but with resistance she keeps up her confident front. of all places, this is not where she would submit to him. chaeyoung packed her bags to get away from chanyeol and it was only typical that he knew exactly where she was.
setting the glass down, chaeyoung works nonexistent wrinkles out of her little baby blue dress, knowing that dressing up was in vain because she was not completely over what they had. their toxic, disgusting, vile entanglement that she was so helplessly addicted to. fingers grasp at the soft fabric and for a brief moment, hesitance washes over her features. chaeyoung hides it though, quick enough that when her chin tilts upward to face him again, it's as if nothing changed. she wasn't going to let him scar her any more than he already had. not if she could help it.
"you saw me in the lobby? what are you, my stalker?" she pauses after he imposes the question. it's loaded. she doesn't want to answer, because there's no win for her. if she says yes, then she'll be constantly reminded of the memories they shared, both the good and the bad. if she says no, the irrational part of her will long for his presence again. so she stays silent, weighing the two options and stalling for time by taking another sip of her drink. "you can stay. but not for too long. and you're paying for this drink, too." leaning back against the bar, chaeyoung tucks her hair behind her ear and gazes at him. "so what are you doing here? looking for another girl to ? i wouldn't be surprised if you were." her tone is biting and she hopes it cuts deep into his heart like it does for her, but she knows it's a long shot. he never quite cared whether she hurt or not, anyway.
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 if anyone knew the horrendous story that was his life, it was the latter. she had been there to see through it all; darkness rather than light and crashing, burning lows instead of soaring highs. even for the worst, chaeyoung had always stayed by his side, when he had needed and wanted her to. she stayed, despite the cold, hard fact that he had been the one to ruin the paradise they had built together- destroy and set up in flames, all for just one stupid, single moment of selfishness. and that should have been the end, but it hadn't- he hadn't been able to forget, no matter how hard he had tried.
at first, he only called her when things were unbearable, but after the second, the third, and the fourth.. he knew he had already crossed a point in which he couldn't go back. it was too late, he didn't want to let chaeyoung go-not then, not now, not ever. if she wanted out from their web of entangled, twisted ties, chanyeol wasn't just going to let her leave with a mere slap on the wrist. he was going to make sure it burned; that it hurt- that chaeyoung would always carry an embedded scar in the depths of her heart that only he could tend to.
she was always so crazy beautiful- the dim, classy, upscale atmosphere and mood of the bar hardly matching up to her exquisiteness in comparison. in contrary, it portrayed the setting as more inviting, because her presence was there and not because the establishment was the only place in which he could drink his feelings down. "i could ask you the same thing." he replied to her question, replacing his grin with a softened smile. "stressed already? you just got here- i mean, okay i admit it, i saw you in the lobby earlier." he confessed. "would have said hi, but you looked like you had your hands full of luggage." motioning to the bartender, he ordered two long island teas for them. "this may help." chanyeol immediately took a sip of his own glass. "so, since your night's already not to the best of starts, mind if i stay here and provide you with bad company?" indirectly, he was being honest, addressing the whole nature of their interactions; bittersweet and of nothing good.
@☼ : chanyeol park。 it was supposed to be a getaway. it was one of those weeks where she was feeling far too low to consider anything else in her life. priorities shifted and chaeyoung booked a ticket for a one person vacation. it stemmed from one person, one force in her life. had he just left her alone, perhaps they'd be happier. there were aspects of him that she'd come to appreciate, but bitterly. he was persistent, attentive at times, and a part of her loved to indulge in the fact that she was the one he could come to, the rock in his life because she had obviously had some sense of responsibility in her. but it became too much and she needed to get away, put herself first before she had imploded.
he'd cheated on her. there was no going back after that. or at least, that's what she thought, because every time he came back she caved. she was so in love with him and it hurt that he knew it. the drink in front of her stills after the bartender leaves, her eyes looking at the alcohol in the glass, until a painfully familiar voice breaks her out of her pitiful trance. chaeyoung turns her head, eyes glazing over his devastatingly handsome features. his wide eyes, pointed nose, pink lips. features she'd all adored so dearly, and a part of her still does. "what are you doing here, chanyeol?" the question leaves her lips in a manner of exhaustion, now fully aware that the one reason why she'd booked this vacation had come to haunt her.
they had these up and down phases. he'd come around and she'd be the shoulder to cry on. they'd share laughs, soft touches and affectionate kisses under the sheets, hold each other and share 'i love you's. and then he'd be gone the next day, without a note or word, just like that. it'd happen each time and she'd fall for it like a fool. the deception of love had kept her so blissfully ignorant during their highs, but it ripped her from the transient moments of euphoria when he left. yet there was something so enticing, so addictive about him. "i'm having a hard time relaxing, so i figured i'd try something harder."
@☼ : chaeyoung park。 for once, on a weekend night, the bar was pretty empty- just the way chanyeol had hoping it would be. he guessed the lack of patrons was due to the pool party event that was currently taking place at the resort. he hadn't been in the mood to go, not after he had found out the other day that a certain someone had just arrived, checked in and was here to stay for an indefinite period of time. an antagonist in his life, for their presence was that of a lethal, guilty pleasure in his life- so maliciously bad, but so deliriously good.
they knew what they were getting into, ever since he had decided to reach out to her again- had convinced her to answer his longing calls.
"damn, rough night or what. that's not your usual go-to drink, park chaeyoung." he commented, sliding into the empty seat next to her, the motive to approach her embedded in stone, as soon as he had caught the slightest glimpse of her in the lobby. "long time no see. how have you been? what's up, literally- get it, cus' we're on a mountain resort and mountains are high up.." he offered, grinning sheepishly in hopes that he found his lame joke somewhat appealing.
it was a paradoxical relationship he harbored with her; a love-hate one. loved, because she was the spark that lit up his world in times of grey, but hated, because the latter brought out the very worse in him too. the underlying themes between them both were always the same; lie, cheat and deceive. endings were never of joyous ends, but of a twisted straw- winding and winding with tension- taut with distress, closer and closer to just splintering apart.
