"I’M SO UPSET. I JUST GOT DUMPED AT A STUPID HOUSE PARTY. ALL I WANT TO DO IS GO HOME AND DEVOUR A BUCKET OF ICE CREAM. BUT WHY WON’T MY CAR START? OH, BECAUSE IT’S YOUR CAR AND I DON’T DRIVE–WAIT, WHY DON’T YOU LOCK YOUR CAR DOORS, WEIRDO? ALSO, PLEASE TAKE PITY ON ME AND DRIVE ME HOME WHILE I SOB INCOHERENTLY NEXT TO YOU."
"When muse a’s cell phone battery dies, they resort to passing paper notes to muse b so they can continue an important conversation. Much to their displeasure, their teacher catches them and insists that muse b read the note in front of the class as punishment."
1. I hack into the announcements system every Friday to softly play music that people have suggested to me during class. And everyone just listens while they work and dances around and has a good time. And I’ve just been caught by you, wanna chill and pick a song..?
2. I volunteer at the nurses office after school, and you’re the idiot who joined the Adventure Challenge Club, where it’s lots of physical activities, and you don’t ing listen to your instructor, at all... We see each other a lot
3. “Why are you hiding in the bathroom?”
“Why are you /reading/ in the bathroom?”
“…touche-”
Wish I could say that was the last time this happened to us-
4. we’re always making stupid bets like ‘bet you can’t drink this whole bottle of BBQ sauce’ but then you did and now you’re sick and I feel really bad here let me look after you
5. ‘a mutual friend tried to introduce us, but we already knew each other from LARPing but we’re both too embarrassed to admit that so i jokingly said we used to date and oh god now our friend wont stop interrogating us about it’ au
6. ‘im egging your house for a dare but your parent is a cop and they’re yelling at me so i told them that you were my ex and you wronged me and now you’re coming outside and please go along with this i don’t want to go to jail’ au
7. ‘my current partner is a huge and i need a reason to break up with them so will you pretend to be my possessive and violent ex’ au