@⁰⁴ juyeon l. Empty. That was the only that could explain how Jisung had been feeling these past few weeks. He liked to think he was past the stage of crying his eyes out (though he'd catch himself tearing up and choking at the sight of anything that reminded him of his ex), and all that was left was the hollow feeling of him trying to find himself again. As much as he hated to say it, the vacation he ended up taking with his best friends didn't help much either. , nothing was going right for him lately. Hopefully with the help of Juyeon, who surprisingly and within a short period of time became another one of his closest friends, he'd be able to feel at least a little bit better. Actually, he didn't need to hope; he knew spending time with him would undoubtedly make him feel better.
The sound of knocking at his door snapped him out of his lifeless stare at the kitchen counter. How long had he been standing here again? With a shake of his head, he quickly scurried towards the entrance, where he pulled back the door and his eyes undoubtedly lit up at the sight of the other. "Hey," he breathed, quickly moving so that Juyeon could step inside. "Do you need any help with that? I'm sorry I asked for so much today." Though the two of them joked around a lot and sometimes argued like cats and dogs, Jisung was incredibly grateful for everything the other did for him, no matter how big or small.
@⁰³ jisung h. Two boxes of pizza? Check. Weed? In his bag. Booze? Hefty. Overnight clothes? Not too necessary. Hotel? Trivagoㅡ Juyeon had to shake his head to rid the thoughts off his mind, the wild array of what once was a pretty brushed up coiffe now a mess that fell down his forehead in mild curls. Despite having taken a quick shower at the club, he was still a slightly stinky and sweaty mess but he liked to think it was because he had spent the past hour rushing around town to get what he needed for the little impromptu sleepover.
Walking up the stairs to Jisung’s dorm, Juyeon pondered about two things; how natural it had gotten for the two of them to be near each other so much either out of emergenced comfort or simply hanging out and then how accustomed he’d gotten to the same building. Sure, Jisung shared his dorm with god only knew who but Juyeon didn’t mind. He sighed as he came to a stop in front of the door, heavily ringed knuckle raised to rap thrice on the metal surface.
@⁰² christopher b. Jisung's lips parted, a whine buzzing out of his throat at the tug of his hair, it now being the other's turn to taunt him. His chocolate eyes seeped into the man before him, the fire in his stomach only growing more in intensity as he heard him speak those words of lust. Remember who's he was, how could he forget? Even long after the marks Chris left on him had faded, he could still feel the imprint in his skin. Oh, how he's tried to forget, but in the end never could.
"Oh, I'll be nothing but good for you," he spoke, sultry voice low yet intertwined with something that would make the average person assume the sentence out of context was pure, sinless. Yet, the way his eyes shined with desire and the knowing simper on his lips said otherwise. Letting go of a breath he didn't even know he had been holding in once his grip let up on his hair, it was easily replaced with a moan and was followed by the involuntary roll of his hips against his hand. "." He breathed out, knowing that if the other kept this act up that he would just like this. And knowing Chris, he'd only be ridiculed and pushed further into sensitivity as the night grew on.
"Not... Not fair." It wasn't fair, but when were things ever fair between them? Jisung's hands struggled to free themselves from his grip, chest heaving as he tried his best to silence himself, but failing more than he'd like to admit.
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. Jisung was now unable to keep the smile that crept onto his lips, a breath of relief he didn't even know he had been holding in being let out. His roommate clearly wasn't the type of person, let alone in even the correct state, for him to be worried about what he said, but he couldn't help it. To everybody except his best friends he was that way, but even with them there were certain things he never went much into for his own sake of privacy. Maybe it was time to change that. A soft hum erupted from his throat in agreement, both with himself and his roommate. "I'll follow your lead, then. Think we lived together long enough and it's about time we be more honest with each other."
The gentle words of the other were enough to relax his mind. He always held himself up to an extremely high standard. As much as he hated it, how others viewed him he very much took to heart. "Thank you," was all he could find himself to say gently, but that was only because there wasn't nearly enough time in the day to truly express his gratitude for such comments. Another few sips from his bottle before he realized he had actually downed the rest of its contents. "Ah, the dating type?" Jisung started in a teasing voice, eyes lighting up at this new territory they were beginning to enter. "I guess I have to let those girls in my chemistry class to give it up. You seem to be pretty popular with the underclassmen. Kidding!" Though it was evident that he was joking, there was still some truth to his words. The amount of times he had caught people who spoke with so much affection in their eyes was quite a number, but they all ended up struggling to get any further than a 'hello' or quick glance at the call of his name.
"Love?" he paused to hum, feigning as if he were thinking seriously on the matter when he in-fact already knew the answer, "I have been in love so many times, my knees are bleeding from falling and never being caught." He laughed tenderly, though his heart ached at just the mention of the... sickness. "I'm still in love with somebody who has caused me nothing but pain. How stupid am I?"
@⁰³ jisung h. (sh) Red. Blazing, searing hot red. Chris was beginning to feel fire coursing through his system at Jisung's persistent teasing and egging, his sharp piercing words contrasting the oh-so-gentle tone he employed and his gentle feather-like touches always barely missing where he craved to be touched the most. He wasn't about to back down however; he always liked it w-
Oh. The hair tugging. He had actually nearly forgotten just how weak he was for that, and it was evident that Jisung remembered it bright as day. To add on to his vulnerability, his neck was within easy reach and Jisung had gone directly for the kill, choosing to turn his otherwise unmarred skin into a crude artwork of lust dripping with underlying tones of love. Chris couldn't withhold the involuntary whine and slight cry at having his neck assaulted, his body jerking and rutting against the younger's. He also hissed at the sensation of the cool metal ball trailing after each hot attack on his skin, cursing himself internally because , Jisung really wasn't playing it fair and he really overestimated his power.
"F-ing hell..... You never l-listened babe. I liked it when y-you were /my/ ing ." Chris spat out in a desperate attempt to regain some control, one hand roughly finding and capturing Jisung's wrists in a vice-like grip as the other grasped a fistful of the younger's dark chestnut locks, tugging on them a little harsh so that he can meet Jisung's lustful gaze with his own fiery ones. "I'm gonna make you remember who you'll /always/ belong to, sweetcheeks. Ruin you the way you did me, make you feel me for months to come." Chris practically growled as he unconsciously began rutting his clothed pelvis against the younger's, ironic considering his attamept to be in control between them. "Then depending on how good you've been for me, I'll keep my word and return the favour twofold if not ten." He continued in a slightly deeper tone, leaning in to nip on Jisung's kiss-bruised plush lower lip. "You're never going to forget me, sweetcheeks. Ever." With that, he flashed Jisung the most darkest smirk he could muster before he released his grip on the younger's locks only to cup and palm him roughly through his sweats, sliding down his body so he could begin his own assault on one of his sensitive nubs.
@⁰³ jisung h. (sh) "You have nothing to apologize for," Seungcheol reaffirmed, leaning against his hands as he found himself so subconsciously tracing the details of the smaller's face. He'd never seen him so close like this, properly seeing him as something more than a figure on the other side of the room. And yet even then he liked the other's company, a silent presence that made him not feel alone for the periods he was there. Seungcheol wondered if such a thing was embarrassing to say aloud...surely, he should have friends at this point, ones that he'd deemed as such through actual conversation and not simply the requirement of seeing each other each day due to an arbitrary room assignment. And yet, his sweet spot for Jisung remained, for some reason or another.
"I promise to start saying such things when I'm not finding myself at this end of a bottle as well...you deserve to hear such things." A promise that may or may not have been completely disingenuous, depending on what kind of mood he found himself in the morning. He'd always made such promises to others and himself like this, to various degrees of success. He'd become more outgoing, sober, try and find some meaning deeper than the shallowness that he allowed himself...all beautiful thoughts, certainly, but reality was a harsh mistress to the poet who dreamed of bright skies and sincere affections. "Regardless of what you say, Jisung...I think you're a good man. And I'm the one who gets to see you after you've hung up the face you've shown to the outside world." And now Jisung had seen his...perhaps now they were even.
"Don't worry...I don't need wise words about the one and all that. S'pose I don't need to be worried about trivial things like men or women when I'm not really...the dating type." A bit embarrassing to admit aloud, he thought, taking another sip of soju from the bottle. Someone so closed off and genuine love was all too like water and oil, with Seungcheol always finding himself pushing away what was good for him. "You seem like you have some real thoughts on such a matter, though..." Intrusive thoughts plagued him as he wondered about Jisung's own life,fingers drumming against the glass before finally blurting it out. "Have you been in love before?"
@⁰² christopher b. He was right; the good boy had been dead for so long, Jisung was sure that he never even met him to begin with. But sometimes he felt he could still catch a glimpse of him, when the other's eyes began to brim themselves with tears at the overstimulation he would feed the older without mercy, cries of pleasure echoing long enough in his brain to feed his ego even now. He nipped at Chris' lips, the cold silver of his jewelry swiping messily at his bottom lip as he found it difficult to even attempt to respond to such a delicious threat. Helping toss his own shirt aside, the pause had him confused, about to ask if something was wrong until his eyes followed his gaze, in which his wicked grin returned. His legs pressed into the older's lower back, their crotches now pressed even more than they already had been before, but the roll of his own hips was gentle, almost teasing. He could already feel him through his sweatpants.
"Huh," he spoke open mouthed, warm breath fanning against the other, "I thought you liked when I was a ." Oh. He knew he was in for it tonight, but when was he never? This game they played, it was one they usually never skipped regardless of who was in charge. His hands that were now free roamed the older's body, tracing various shapes against his skin and going lower and lower... just never low enough. "If I'm such a , what are you gonna do about it, baby boy?" His hand was now running through Chris' locks, tugging occasionally so that the he could hear those delectable noises he knew he'd make at the aggression.
"You talk a lot of for somebody who can't seem to back it up, you know?" Jisung challenged, again, knowing damn well where this would be going soon at the others' already different switch. He quickly reached his head towards the older's neck, and biting until there was nothing short of various purples and pinks, stomach bubbling with pride at the clear view that he had been here before anybody else. His hot muscle which was contrasted with the cold metal ball that rested on the tip of his tongue colored over his work. Lips now close to his ears, he nibbled on them for a brief second before saying, "You're too gentle. I think you lost your touch."
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. It was most definitely the alcohol that was making it easier for him to talk with the other, for the both of them. Sure, Jisung had no problem when it came to conversations like these, they usually just didn't happen this suddenly. The drink was working much faster than he anticipated. "Sorry," he apologized after a few beats of silence, feeling guilty for even allowing his thoughts to come out the way they did. "I promise I didn't mean to make it sound weird." Much to his surprise, his sentence didn't do much to his roommate other than let him continue to speak. Fighting the urge to press more about what he could've meant caused him to gently tap the pads of his fingers against his bottle.
"I appreciate the compliment. You may have just spiked my confidence for the rest of the year," he joked, a smile much wider than his last one being on full display for Seungcheol. He listened silently, finding himself humming in agreement once he was finished and heaving out a sigh of some degree of understanding. Jisung was learning more about his roommate than he ever thought he would, and while he wished it was under different circumstances and time periods, he was grateful for the sincerity of their current conversation. It had been a while since he had been involved in one like this. "Trust me, I'm not one to admire." Seconds passed by, the male wracking his brain for a response to further support what he meant.
"I think I'm a bit disingenuous, actually. But, I understand at least some of what you're talking about. I wish I could give an answer that I would know for sure would help or have meaning, but the best that I can say right now is that time will come sooner or later." He nodded gently, head tilting back as his gaze now met the ceiling. "You'll find that person, no matter the gender, that will make showing how you feel a second nature. Hell, even when you don't want them to know how you feel about certain things, they'll be able to read you easier than you can read yourself. It's annoying in the moment, but it's endearing in the long run."
@⁰³ jisung h. He didn't mean to, but he almost recoiled (in fear? Guilt? Shame? Even he didn't know why that had been his involuntary response) when his eyes locked with the boy's underneath him. Jisung's softer-than-expected bite back to his question practically flew over his head as he unconsciously allowed himself to momentarily drown in those beautiful glassy eyes, the eyes he swore he could still see traces of love and care for him shimmering within. He'd admitted to Jisung a few times that his eyes were one of his most favourite features whilst they were dating; he didn't expect such an innocent liking would return to haunt him as one of his most effective weaknesses.
Trying his best to still maintain some semblance of control, he tore his now-softened gaze away from those orbs to focus on something, anything else. He was glad that Jisung had chosen to whisper to him, finding it to be a great source of distraction despite not liking what the boy was putting out. Not one bit. Jisung was doing this on purpose, he was ruthlessly punching on the buttons that would make him tick and carelessly stoking his carnal fire within. Chris really should know better, but his stubborn self just had to take the bait. It wasn't long before he got heated again, claiming Jisung's lips into another deep and bruising kiss. If Jisung wanted to play it dirty (like he always did, and Chris would never verbally admit that he enjoyed getting riled up although his instincts and actions would say otherwise), then he'll get dirty.
"The good boy has been dead for quite some time, sweetheart." He muttered in the kiss, not giving Jisung any room for snarky rebuttals or opportunities for reprieve. Even his strong hands found themselves unconsciously pinning the smaller's wrists in an iron grip against the sheets. "You're the absolute /cutest/ for thinking that I'd let you leave after you your frustrations out of me. This monster would return you what you gave twofold if not ten, baby." He spat (without much bite or malice) as he unceremoniously broke their messy liplock, only to rid himself of his sweatshirt and nearly ripping Jisung's own oversized shirt off. The silver glint of the smaller's newly-acquired barbell resting prettily at his navel had him pausing momentarily; his eyes were dilating as he took in the sight. As if a switch had been flipped inside of him, he launched for Jisung's swelling couplets once again, this time with subconscious animalistic groans and growls rumbling deep in his throat. "ing ."
@⁰³ jisung h. Maybe he was more similar than he thought to his extroverted roommate. How could they be living together for so long and still not notice such details about each other. At least Jisung got a pass; talking to a sober Seungcheol about his life was like pulling teeth, all too hostile about the thought of others abusing what they knew about him. But Jisung was an open book, one he was lucky enough to see a glimpse into occasionally and commit it to memory. And even then, he only knew a bit. He was a fashion designer, he was quite driven, and he always seemed to be pushing himself a little too hard. Seungcheol only wished he knew how to look after the stranger who had become someone he'd dared call a friend.
"You've always been pretty," Seungcheol mumbled, lips moving before his brain. "When you first moved in, when I saw you...it felt like a movie." Luckily, Seungcheol's loose tongue was at least able to leave out his questioning of himself within that time, drinkenly dabbling with beautiful men that made him feel something again. At least, until he woke up the next morning and ignored all of it once again. So was a pattern for Seungcheol in most things he enjoyed, getting himself blackout just to allow himself to feel anything and everything he found himself shutting down. A healthy habit, surely, to go to the bottle before going to therapy.
A shame. Seungcheol wasn't sure if he heard that right, the words resonating within him and making him look even redder than his drunken glow. No, it was quite the opposite... "More like it's a shame how all too into them I am," He thought aloud, as if the boy wasn't even beside him. "At least with girls, I don't have to spend time overthinking about what I want." Not that he even let himself think about romance in the first place, throwing himself into work to stop himself from falling for just another beautiful person who would think of him as nothing more than cold. It was more convenient this way, pushing it all deep down like it didn't bruise him when people found him so rough around the edges. "I admire you, Ji... you just, show how you feel, like who you want...It's refreshing."
@⁰² christopher b. This was the only way they could communicate; through each other's bodies without there being a translation of what was said the next day. So they had to do it again, again, and again, each time more painful than the last to his soul, at least what part of his soul he still had a grasp on. Where was the rest of it? Easily keeping himself steady in the hold of the other, his mind was so focused on their current osculation that the cooling temperature of the sheets against his skin came as a surprise. His lips opened in a slight gasp, chest heaving as he tried to keep his fervor under control. "Means you're ing indecisive," Jisung sassed back, though his tone not nearly as aggressive as he anticipated.
Eyes locking with Chris' for the first time since he came in, his heart softened. The rest of his soul? Ah, there it was. Glowing ever-so-brightly within the man above him that he found it hard to continue his anger at. He loved him so much that it hurt, but there was only so much pain he could take. Two years. Down the drain without any sight of seeing the light ever again. "You're such a ing brat, you know that?" His voice was only but a whisper, but it was clear that the other could hear him. "You're lucky I'm being nice, when I could easily all of my frustrations out of you. Better yet, wouldn't even give you a chance to finish." The crudeness of his words were almost enough to mirror the itch he was beginning to feel, deep inside his body, that he knew only the older could reach. He would receive the satisfaction, one way of another, but they both knew how much Jisung liked to aggravate the other to his liking. His hands, wrists, anywhere Chris had contact with on his own body was on fire again. Something similar to a breathy laugh pushed past his lips, head tilted with a grin so taunting only one could assume he was up still up to no good. "But, like the good boy you are, you'd take it anyways."
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. Jisung had been taught all his life about how you weren't supposed to judge a book by their cover, yet here he sat, having done that same very thing since they became roommates. A sinking feeling of guilt began to set itself inside his stomach at his words, no longer relating them to their situation currently, but to the one that had been eating him up for nearly a year now. "That is true," he agreed, heaving out a heavy sigh and throwing back another few swigs of the alcohol. "You'd be surprised how many times I've thought the same." Now was not the time to think about the one who shall not be named. He wasn't important right now.
"Pretty?" Jisung felt his heart stop. Pretty? Sure it wasn't a first hearing that, having friends alike that joked around about his more feminine features than anybody else, but to hear this from the upperclassman? A lump began to form in his throat, mind going through files in an attempt to muster up a response that seemed decent enough, only to have it all crumble again. Oh. A girl. He wasn't a girl. Seungcheol was straight, of course. The tips of his ears burned red with embarrassment. Stupid him, overreacting to a drunken "compliment."
"Ah, thank you. Usually, I'm the one calling everybody else pretty. Feels nice to hear it from somebody else for once." He nudged his shoulder into the older boy, but gently enough so that the already intoxicated older didn't lose his balance or drop anything. "What a shame you aren't into guys." Wait, what did he say?
@⁰³ jisung h. There it was, the crumbling of Jisung's resistance. He'd never voice it out loud, but a part of him deep down was beyond glad that he was /still/ able to have this effect on the other despite the bad and the ugly that had transpired between them. Letting his eyes drift shut momentarily, he poured out as much unspoken feelings and doubts as he could into the kiss, all before it ended (a little too soon in his selfish opinion) when Jisung found the will to break it. He tilted his head back, resting it against the wall; he knew Jisung had his eyes on him, he could feel it (how could he not? They dated for almost 2 years and fought and ed for a little over a year after) but he couldn't bring it upon himself to do the same; for the first time since their breakup, he was genuinely scared of showing the smaller just how much /he/ ed up. How most of what went down was /his/ fault. How Jisung was never in the wrong and how he had every right to have treated him the way he did. his stupid anxiety-induced pessimism and self-depreciative complex.
His internal turmoil was something he never quite understood, much less acknowledged, which was why he resorted to what he kept up over the year - gaslight, lie to and manipulate Jisung with his toxic words whilst his body and actions painted the truth oh-so-tragically vandalised. Tonight was apparently no different; it was beyond stupid of him to think that with each time things could be different. He always expected the other to change to accommodate to him, refusing to admit that /he/ was the one who needed fixing. Jisung's words stung deeply as they always have, just reminder after painful reminder of how their predicament was almost all on him. He silently thanked that he was spared any opportunity for rebuttal when Jisung turned the tables and pulled him in the second time, once again pouring out as much of his unspoken regrets into the kiss. He hated the mere thought of it, but he was well-versed in the layout of Jisung's dorm and he didn't waste another second before he was moving his strong hands to lift his (ex-)lover by his thighs, guiding them to wrap around his sturdy frame before leading them towards the direction of the other's bedroom. Kicking the door shut behind them, he managed to posit Jisung on his bed and clamber over his smaller frame, intertwining both their hands and only then breaking their liplock. "The fact that I keep coming back to you has to mean something, doesn't it? It's only fair because you ruined me, Sungie. You ruined me for anyone else."
@⁰³ jisung h. Seungcheol let out a quiet hum at the smaller's response, seemingly pleased with an idea so absurd as missing him in his dreams. But despite Seungcheol's outward appearance the man was all too clingy, grasping onto even the smallest affections in pure hopelessness. "You're not the first person to think such a thing," The older admitted, his smile faltering into a countenance akin to his normal demeanor for a split second. "It's hard for others to understand," He began, not at all worried about oversharing in his current state. "Words are so often used against us, Jisung. I try to use them sparingly." Beatings for backtalk, mocking for his heartfelt words...sometimes it did feel as if speaking wasn't even worth it to the man lest he deal with the consequences.
But tonight such thoughts were out of the window, nearly every thought blurted out as quickly as he thought it. "Has anyone told you...you're kinda pretty?" Eyes gazed down at the smaller's for a second before pulling away, not needing to let his heart flutter from even more affection or simply risk bursting all together. "What a shame you're not a girl, hm? You're a gem." Bold and a bit strange, certainly, and yet he couldn't help himself. If only there were someone out there that cared to know him the way his roommate had finally come around to, he thought, mind already wiped clean of his words as he downed the next shot.
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. A laugh bubbled in his stomach, arm slinging over himself to immediately calm his already hurting form. He would cherish this comment for far longer than he'd like to admit, having never heard anything similar. "I promise. I'll miss you even when I'm sleeping." His fingers tapped at the counter underneath them, eyes scanning for a nearby bottle that he could start on. Finding one, it only took seconds for the bottle to be opened and its contents to spill down his throat.
Jisung found his grip stiffening around the glass. Ah. If it weren't already obvious, there was clearly a lack of understanding between the two about how one viewed the other. Never in a million years would he have thought these confessions would come from the very person that he lived with. In a way, he felt guilty; this whole time he was under the assumption that he was annoying, bothersome even. In reality, his roommate had thought such sweet things of him. "I'm glad you're my roommate, too. I know I'm not here too often, but I'll definitely try to be," he paused, being /almost/ too nervous to continue, "I actually thought you kind of hated me." Another laugh left his throat, giving his full and undivided attention to the male beside him, if he wasn't already.
@⁰² christopher b. Jisung tried to move backwards at the sight of him moving in closer, but Chris was too fast and he found himself almost surrendering at his warm embrace. Hands moving to hit at the other's chest in an attempt to free himself, everything he was trying clearly not having any affect. He hated himself; he was trying so hard but the minute his stupid body came in contact with his own, he knew any attempt of his brain taking control was futile. "Get off of—" he was interrupted by the feeling of Chris' lips against his own, all his protests dying down like fire being smothered under a blanket. Only God knew how much he missed this feeling. His brain was beginning to flood itself with memories of similar moments like these. Ones where afterwards Jisung would place gentle kisses on the pads of his boyfriend's fingers, whispering words of adornment into their sleepless nights under the sky. .
Kissing back without any delay, his hands that were used to try and defend himself were now gripping at his shirt as if they were the only thing keeping him sane. It seemed like forever when he finally pulled himself back, chest heaving, trying to remember how to breathe again without him. " you," Jisung muttered. His eyes locked on the older's chin, afraid that his eyes would too betray him and show the other just how much he still missed him. "You think you can just throw me away and pick me back up whenever you want? It's not ing fair." A hiccup escaped his throat, eyes beginning to swell as his eyes were now burning up at the touch of his tears. Eyes squeezing shut in a failed attempt to keep himself together, it was his turn to grab the back of Chris' neck and pull his lips back onto his own, his lips moving more vigorously than they had before.
@⁰³ jisung h. The door swung open and behind it stood the core subject of his continued turmoil and anguish. Ironically, the sharp, cold tone of his words managed to calm Chris down enough; he wasn't seeing, hearing, feeling red anymore. Rather, he now felt pink. Pink for the sudden rush of feelings the both of them always decided to ignore, only voicing it out in a cruel-yet-desperate excuse of a bartering chip. Pink for the (un)certainty of the possible event(s) that would transpire that night. Pink for th different warmth that was resurfacing in his chest.
In a single wordless motion, he took the singular step to cross the threshold of Jisung's apartment, envelop the smaller male in his strong arms and squeeze him in a tight embrace. It was probably the wrong move to make (then again, when did he ever say or do the right things with Jisung since their breakup?) and he would probably be met with at least a dozen punches to his chest, but he couldn't care less. His stupid pathetic heart /always/ overruled his mind. "Maybe I am, and what about it? You're not so much better yourself. Now shut the up and let me finish what I need to say." His mind was a white buzz, his heart an erratic mess. Perhaps he should've been more clear when he told Jisung he'd wanted to talk, because Jisung was maybe right after all - there really was nothing to talk about. Verbally, at least. Without another word, he swiftly leaned down to capture the smaller's lips in a searing kiss, his hold tightening a little as if to prevent Jisung from running away.
@⁰² christopher b. This happened all the ing time. They could never stay away from each other for long and even when they tried, it always ended up with a situation like this one. Jisung was stressed; hell, he was the ing epitome of stress at this point. Why did Chris keep doing this to him? More importantly, why did he keep letting him back in? The answer was obvious, but with his brain swimming in anger he couldn't think of anything nice.
Hands grasping his door knob, Jisung cursed in annoyance and swung it open, chocolate eyes immediately glaring at the one person who seemed to always piss him off. "Are you ing stupid?" Was the first thing that spilled from his lips, not in the mood to have yet /another/ noise complaint taped to his door the next morning. "You're lucky Seungcheol isn't here or I wouldn't have even let you in," he grumbled, referencing to his roommate who he much desired to keep out of this issue of theirs.
@⁰³ jisung h. "Oh." There was a slight pause in his mind at being told such exciting words again, a goofy smile shining through for a brief moment before looking away. Did regular people always feel like this, so enveloped in the feeling of being cared for even when alone? "Being missed ... it's nice. Promise to miss me a lot from now on." Still a bit reserved his eyes flicker away from the smaller boy, soon finding himself preoccupied with instead taking his confections out of the oven. Far too much coffee bread for one man, sure... yet Seungcheol felt confident in his abilities at the time.
"I only have pain soju, but do help yourself to it," He hummed, hopping up onto the counter beside the younger. "As for the coffee bread, you'll simply have to let me bother you until it properly cools. Deal?" That smile... it was enough to fight wars over, Seungcheol thought to himself, wondering what he had to do to see that smile more often from now on. "You know...I'm glad you're my roommate. I wonder if anyone else would put up with me." Sure, he knew he came off as brash...but Jisung never scolded him over it, never made him feel like he'd done the wrong thing. And as small as such actions were, they meant everything to Seungcheol. "Thanks."
@⁰³ jisung h. Red. Searing hot, blind red. That was all Chris could see, all he could hear as he practically sprinted his way over to the other's dorm from the greenhouse. He didn't know if he hated the other male more for always sending his attempts at resolution and maintaining a truce up in flames, or himself more because his pathetic heart would always overrule any logic churned out by his brain. Regardless, this was always the case between them, a twisted game of who could push all of the other's buttons and make him snap first. And in this particular round, Jisung had clearly won.
He was so blinded by the seething rage that he felt, he didn't even register himself practically flying up the stairs after nearly smashing the elevator's button panel into bits and almost breaking a knuckle or two. True to his word, he was outside and banging on the other's door within 3 minutes from when their call ended. "Han Jisung!!!" He yelled, uncaring of the noise he was creating.
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. "I did," Jisung confirmed again, glancing up at Seungcheol before resuming to place his items inside the fridge. It felt strange to say out loud, but he really had missed him. He was the one that did the talking usually and even though he was scared of the other sometimes (most of the time), he could say his company wasn't as bad as people would assume. Seeing this new side of him was shocking, yeah, but at least they were getting somewhere further than they usually did.
"A drink?" The fridge was now closed and Jisung found himself leaning against the counter, the nickname he was given having yet to register. Being worried about wasn't too foreign of a feeling; Jisung worried everybody from his close friends, to teammates and especially his parents. His heart swelled for the first time in a while, appreciative that the other was indeed trying to look out for him. Was he really not here /that/ often? "Yes sir, I will eat a bunch and would love to have a drink with you." A slightly wider smile than before graced his features, a newfound excitement filling his chest as his eyes shaped themselves into crescents. Pushing himself off the counter to start walking again, he took off his jacket and dropped his book bag near his bed.
@⁰³ jisung h. "Leaving already?" Typically Seungcheol wouldn't even bat an eye at such a statement. But the drunken poet was all but typical today, leaning against his roommate for support perhaps a bit /too/ close. Jisung was kind of pretty like this, he thought to himself, never once close enough to his roommate to notice his big eyes and fluttering lashes. "Cute..." He mumbled to himself, finally holding himself up again as he followed the smaller back to the kitchen.
"You missed me?" Seungcheol cocked a brow, not used to the feeling of being missed. It was a nice feeling, something that warmed him more than the alcohol in his system. He'd always quite enjoyed his roommate, even if he didn't show it in the best ways, barely even offering up a smile on their normal days. He didn't know why he so wanted to keep the boy before him taken care of and yet Seungcheol still found himself caring, wondering if Jisung was taking care of himself on the days he was away. "Have a drink with me, Ji," He spoke colloquially and for once with the pet name, eyes on his snacks in the oven as the smaller put away his drinks. "Eat a lot while you're here too...soI know you're taken care of when you're away again."
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. He took note of their current surroundings; nothing seemed out of place and everything looked how it usually did, but the atmosphere this time was just... different. Gaze quickly falling back onto his roommate at the sound of his voice, the male unconsciously felt himself stiffen up. "S-Sorry, I can lea––" the beginning of his rambling was interrupted by a shocking statement. Missed him? Jisung was missed? The Choi Seungcheol missed Han Jisung? Eyes rapidly blinking in surprise, even as his arm was thrown around his shoulders, this was almost too much to process.
"I missed you too," Jisung finally spoke, but it sounded more of like a question than anything else. "It's been a while since I had any... but... I do." His brain finally caught up with himself and he found himself giving half of a smile, his free hand raising to briefly pat the older's back. What was this feeling? Comfort? No, his heart was still racing too fast to even compare it to that. This had been the first time the two were even having a proper conversation and although he was relieved, it was still not the easiest thing to come to terms with. "I brought home some more regular drinks for the fridge. It's been like a week, so I didn't know if we already ran out. Sorry if you don't like any of these."
Now, it was his turn to move deeper inside their dorm, opening the refrigerator in the kitchen to put away what he was holding.
@⁰³ jisung h. Between work and school, it wasn't often Seungcheol had a full day to himself, to love his introverted dream of a do-nothing day. So when sunday rolled around and nothing was on his schedule, Seungcheol was fully prepared to give himself the best lazy day ever. And to him, that could only mean one thing: boxers on, sweets in the oven, 90s hip hop blasting, and one too many bottles of the cheapest wine at the grocery store. Screw well-worked poetry; this was Seungcheol's true magnum opus.
It was halfway through a salt-n-peppa album that his plans changed on a dime, Jisung uncerimonously barging through the door. He'd nearly forgotten he had a roommate with the smaller seldom there, doing whatever with whoever. He didn't dare find out, is social capabilities to the man he slept feet away from somehow still not there. "Jisung." The word came out oddly stern despite the scene around him. On a normal day, he'd be red in the face to be caught in such a compromised state. But with so much alcohol in his system, he suddenly found his fear being overtaken by confidence, speaking more words to his roommate than he'd ever mustered before. "Ah, it's been so long since I even called out to you...I missed you." There was a pep in his demeanor as he slung an arm over the smaller, flashing him a seldom seen grin. "Say, do you like cake bread?"
@⁰⁴ seungcheol c. Work. For as long as he could remember, that's all he had shoved down his own throat. It wasn't healthy, yes, of course he knew that. Did he still find himself being worked to the bone every single day that he was woken up? Yes. It was often that he complained that there just wasn't enough time in a whole day, but maybe it was because giving himself a break allowed unwanted thoughts to reemerge. As much as he would love to keep with this routine of his, Jisung was starting to get sicker and for the first time in a while that worried him. Maybe he just needed a few days to rest his mind and focus on his regular studies? Ugh, that didn't even sound right.
With a heavy sigh, Jisung unlocked his room door and pushed it open with his foot, wanting nothing more than to just find something to distract himself with on this so called "break" he was liberating himself with. Within seconds, his roommate who was briefly forgotten entered his view. "Oh- hello! I should've messaged you and told you I'd be here today," he stammered, apprehension slowly beginning to fill his system as if this wasn't his room as well.
