⥽ conservative church ⥼

It was strange seeing how empty and quiet the church was. Normally even with no people around, there was some kind of sound in here. The old wood creaking or the wind blowing in through one of the small openings in the high seeling. But today it was very quiet. Dongwook carefully placed his hands on the altar softly brushing the linen covering it. It was already perfect and pristine but it gave him a feeling of calm. Then like always he slowly walked between the church benches making sure everything was in order and ready for whoever would walk through this door.

He had taken over this congregation a few months ago and besides from mess, there weren’t many people coming to church. Even though he had always seen the church as a hiding place and as a place of comfort he understood that not many saw it the same way. God was not kind and codling like some churches meant to make you believe. If god was soft and kind then there would have been no suffering in the world. But for Dongwook it was precisely because of the suffering in the world that he started to believe in god. Started to understand what god was and how religion worked for him.

In his youth he had fought with himself over the question does god exist and now he still wasn’t sure, despite that he had become a priest one that was honest and open. At least he hoped he was. He didn’t mind people questioning their religion and never wanted to force anyone into believing after all every single person had their own story and the right to their thoughts. He just wanted to support and help those who struggled and over the years he had realized that as a priest he didn’t need to know if god was real he just needed to believe that someone was out there hoping for you to do your best. And with his belief in that he did his best every day.

Turning back around he looked up at Jesus nailed to the cross to one side of the altar. Hanging there he was not only a symbol of his religion but also a symbol of the change his religion had gone through. God had once eradicated every human but one because they had lost faith. Then he sent his son to show forgiveness and love. Dongwook believed that God was still the same ruthless underneath the forgiveness and that the suffering in the world was part of that ruthlessness but he didn’t reject nor deny Jesus’s teachings of love and forgiveness. Every day he would do his best to help and understand the people around him and try to always have an open door and an open ear for anyone who came to him with his struggles.

It was what he thought the suffering was meant to teach us and remind us of. The fact that love forgiveness and above all kindness were the true human virtues that God tried to cultivate in all by giving humans the power to decide and to act evil. It was a lot more difficult and took a lot more strength to stand up and show kindness than it was to be angry and hurt other people and in his mind that was the power of belief a way to show the world that despite the fact that we can be bad we chose to be kind we chose to be open and accepting and we chose to love.

With a soft sigh, Dongwook lowered his eyes again walking towards the back of the church to enter the small side chamber. Just as he walked past the altar the church suddenly made a sound. It was like the long silence had been a holding of breath waiting for this moment like a sign that with the sound a change was entering his life. Turning back around he watched as the door of the church was pushed open.

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