The park was too crowded for Zelo for some reason he didnt like it anymore, or was it just his condition that didnt seem to like it? he didnt know. He stared at the chocolate milk tea he ordered, and smiled a little, the white cream that was shaped into an angel as a decoration made him happy. Everything was so good in the dorm, everyone was happy and loving each other. "It's christmas..." he muttered under his voice and stareda the window admiring the sparkling lights that gave off a holiday spirit, "I wonder what Santa is going to give me?"he chuckled at the thought. He was too immersed in thinking about christmas and prsents to even think about his health, he shouldnt be out here, he should be at the warm dorm resting but no, he chose to stay outside where it's cold and have tea alone. Zelo didnt mind though.
He stayed in the cafe for hours, thinking about how he could fix the awkward feeling with Jongup. Should he just forget about the confession? Pretend that nothing changed? Yongguk let out a tired breath. He can't stay long in this cafe anymore. It was already dark outside. He had to go home.
Yongguk ordered something warm for his stomach and a waffle. He escaped his apartment to have some for himself. He wasn't ready yet to meet Jongup. His act has been acting weird since he heard the word Love from Jongup. He couldn't understand why would someone as nice and caring as Jongup like him. He ruffled his own hair in frustration as he tried to figure out why.
Jongup slowly nodded before regaining the smile that was lost earlier. "Thanks hyung" He bowed before walking a few steps, "Uh .. hyung .. i think we already spent too much time out, i'm sure hyungs and zelo are looking for us now." He smiled weakly. "Let's go home now hyung..." He mumbled before turning around. 'I guess the confession can wait.' He whispered inside his head with his shoulders deflated.
When he heard Jongup's explanation, he frowned a little. He tried to erase any unwelcome thoughts in his mind and placed a hand on Jongup's shoulder. "Relax. We're hear to relax remember? I don't want you panicking over something trivial." He smiled but not the usual smile he wore.
Jongup felt everything stopped, his hyung's hand around his waist was really hot. He quickly scampered away from his touch finally regaining balance he quickly bowed and apologized. "H-h-hyung s-sorry i didn't mean to h-hug you earlier and and ... " He tried to apologize for everything but words seemed to be stuck inside his throat.
Yongguk managed to catch Jongup by the waist while keeping his hot latte on his other hand. "Careful.We don't want that face of yours get bruised." His voice was strained. It was hard to balance and keep Jongup from falling with only one arm. He was strong but he,too, has limits.
Because of his deep voice, Jongup once again realized what he did. He quickly pulled his hand away from him. He didn't mean to do that, his body seems to be moving on its own now, and he doesn't know why, he couldn't contain his feelings for him. He took small steps backwards which made him stumble and fall on the ground.
Yongguk a breath or else he would have hyperventilated. It was a shock that Jongup hugged him after that embarrassing statement. It was also a fortunate thing that he haven't reached for his hot mug or he would have made a mess again of himself. "You're spoiling me dongsaeng" He squeezed the younger ones hand that was wrapped on his waist.
Jongup blinked, a bit surprised by the words he just said from his hyung, is it real? he asked himself, he turned to watch the back of his hyung going towards the counter, without thinking again, he stood up from his chair and ran towards him.
He hugged him with his face on the elder's back. "I-i-is t-this .. f-fine?" He stuttered still behind his hyung. He felt really warm and nice. A blush quickly crossed his cheeks. "D-don't t-turn around hyung ... i-it's embarrassing .."
He really can't stop smiling when Jongup compliments him. His words are like a shot of caffeine. Addictive.
"I wish I could hug you right now." He slipped. Yongguk blushed. He hid his embarrassment with his drink but realized he just broke the cup. "I'll go get a hot latte this time." He said before getting up to order.
Jongup smiled feeling that warm hand again against his skin, whenever his hyung do that to him, he felt so calm, quiet and happy.
He felt so protected and safe whenever he felt his hyung's existence close to him, he really likes him and that's what jongup knows, he's happy whenever his friends are with him, but whenever he see his hyung with someone else especially Zelo, he couldn't help but to feint a smile and move away, but now, no Zelo .. no other guys only him and his hyung. "Hyung ... it's okay .. i really like seeing your smile."
Yongguk doted on Jongup. The reason? He really doesn't know. He finds the member refreshing and pure. A lot different from what he was.
He's different. A lot messier and irresponsible despite what people thought of him as the 'leader'.
He was afraid that he won't be able to reach other people's expectations from him.
Yongguk patted the younger one on the head. "Thanks for comforting your hyung."
After realizing what he did, he quickly pulled his hand from his before turning his head down to hide the blush that moved on his cheeks. He became really uncomfortable because of it, he silently cursed because of what he did, he was afraid that his hyung might found out about his feeling and be disgusted because of it.
The older one froze at the touch. It's warmth snapped him out of his dark thoughts. Only then did he realized that he ruined his drink. He quickly grabbed a paper towel to clean the mess. "It's not your fault. Maybe I should be thankful that they became the reason why I pushed myself and be the person that I am today." He smiled for Jongup. He didn't like seeing the younger one upset. It became a habit of his to take care of s especially this one.
Jongup saw everything .. his face darkening, his hand ane the cup. Jongup doesn't know what to do, but his body moved on its own. He took the older's hand taking the cup away. "Hyung im sorry"
He shook his head. "Not true. I've heard others treat my work like trash and yet here I am making a living with the songs they thought was trash." Yongguk's expression hardened as he remembered those people trying to discourage him from his dream. Never again will he be broken by them.
His grip tightened on the plastic cup that he didn't realize he was spilling it's contents.
Jongup's eyes widened at what he saw from his hyung, is the chocolate keeping him fuzzy giving illusions and things? He asked himself, he shake his head trying to pull his thoughts back to reality. "N-neh ..." he mumbled with his head lowered down since he knows that he's really blushing too much right now.
"E-everyone will surely say that hyung ... because it's true ..."
He felt the younger one's sincerity in those words and smiled fully. He flattened the back of his hair and blushed a little. "Thanks Jongup it means a lot to me coming from you"
Jongup gulped down, his back roughly fell on the back of the chair, leaning on it. His stare went exactly in the face of his hyung, what he said is right, society can be a very scary hindrance when it comes to relationship,especially between the same . The rap felt like angels singing for Jongup, "You're ... amazing hyung ... simply ... amazing." He took his cup and drank a few again before placing it back. "Your lyrics hyung felt like real ... and ... painful."
He traced the rim of his drink and thought about it seriously with a solemn expression in his face. "Society. Sometimes love isn't enough for a relationship to work." He drank a little from his cold drink and started rapping to give the younger a sample.
"In case anyone recognizes us
we can't walk on the streets of Gangnam
Only the neon signs and streetlights in the dark night
are blessing or relationship"
Jongup took his own cup of chocolate to drink a bit, and also to calm himself down. The words of the older one surely hit a spot inside jongup's heart, he couldn't help but to put himself in the shoes of the person inside his hyung's lyrics. "Oh ... hyung .. why did they hid their love from everyone?" He asked.
He nodded brightly. Yongguk was happy that someone was interested his lyrics. "It's about two people that have to hide their affections from everyone." His order was finished and he sipped a large amount of latte. He cringed when a sharp pain hit between the bridge of his nose and his forehead.
Yongguk chuckled at Jongup's sudden interest in his lyrics. "I'm still experimenting but it's about a secret love." He said as he ordered an iced cold latte.
Jongup smiled much brighter than he normally did. He tried so hard to hide the happiness he's feeling right now. "Hyung~ what kind of lyrics are you writing now?" He asked him. a strong scent of coffee quickly rushed inside his nose.
