～ carnival

@♆ : vaan s 。 she smiled unintentionally as she leaned into him, always favoring these moments they had together. her brow raised curiously as she saw the two of you speaking, her eyes narrowing dangerously as she saw the operator looking back at her. she let out a displeased huff as he came back, teddy bear and all. great now her ship was in vaan's hands and if she knew him he'd still ask for more. vera walked up to meet him, lightly touching the bear as she absentmindedly smirked and lazily played with the loose strings on her shorts. "you can pick this time. whatever you want."

@⚘ : vera s 。 irises beginning to spark with newfound interest, he comes forward to press a small peck to her temple and gives her a single nod. his feet are careful and slow when they step back, fingers lingering on her body before they pull away and he makes his way toward the stand to talk to its operator. he doesn't say much to the man behind it, doesn't say anything worth bringing up later either, but the man pulls back and gives him a neutral look for at least a solid minute. his eyes shift to vera for just as long, then he shakes his head and sighs, giving vaan the bear and allowing him to return with it, full grin and all. "that was zero shots," announces the delighted thalassan carrying his prize on his shoulder as he returns to her with a little bounce in his step. "what do i get as a bonus?"

@♆ : vaan s 。 she lets herself be pulled easily, trying her best to fight off the immediate smile that threatens to break through but failing miserably. "sounds like a personal problem," she mumbled, eyeing the flask in his hands and wondering how much he's drank already. with a hum she turned as well, laughter already bubbling out of her. "hm alright...fun. if you can get the bear in less than three shots I'll let you commandeer my ship for a day."

@⚘ : vera s 。 his head pans over to the sudden sound of a familiar voice, elated grin taking over his lips and arm coming around vera's shoulders to pull her close. sighing and taking another drink, he eyes the bear one last time before returning his attention to her. "i don't want all those prizes... just the one," he responds, arm dropping so he can hold her hip and body turning to better face her when he does. "challenge me, though. make this fun."

@♆ : vaan s 。 vera was causally strolling through the carnival, munching on the hotdog she had magically acquired. magically because she didn't remember paying for it but was she going to go back and double check? of course not. she was actually looking for vaan, they had been separated a little bit ago which was why she was meandering around at the many game stands knowing one of them was bound to intrigue him. with a slight cheer and bounce in her step she run up to the duck stand as she spotted his reddish looking hair easily. she stood a little ways behind him and shrugged to his not so question even though he couldn't see her. "you can accrue a large amount of prizes?"

@⚘ : vera s 。 eyes centered on one of the giant teddy bears at the boardwalk's duck shooting stand, he huffs out and takes a quick swig of his whiskey. maybe it's because he's already buzzed, but temptation is hellbent on making him desire things he doesn't need more than normal. the object of his desires today happens to be this bear, something he could easily get if he so chose, but he's hesitant. thinking it over aloud and not really focused on his surroundings. "what's the fun of winning if there is no challenge?"

@♆ : bastian m 。 sinna had never heard bastian talk about his parents, but she didn't question at them being suddenly mentioned. her own nails dug into the skin of her palms as he continued to talk, and she gulped quietly. so that was why he never seemed to actually mourn over his parents, no matter how much he tried to seem like it — there would always be a different sort of emotion in his eyes whenever it was the death anniversary of his parents, though she couldn't honestly pinpoint which emotion it was. all she knew that it wasn't grief. she didn't question it, like always. what right did she have to ask, 'why aren't you mourning over them?' she heard the rumors surrounding his being, and of course, she knew that would be a sensitive topic.

so she never asked, like always.

"believe me, i know."

but did he really? "then... how do i love it again?" she asked. she wasn't truly expecting an answer — it didn't seem like something that he could answer, or anyone, for that matter. "how do i love it again, when all my heart has grown to feel for it is fear?" how could something she had loved so, so much be the very thing she feared the most? one hand moved up to clutch by her chest, and she let her gaze drop. her sight was blurry — and for a moment, it confused her, until she realized it was tears that were filling her eyesight and the heavy feeling in her chest was far too much for her to bear.

memories of the past came flooding in her mind — images of her in front of the piano, of her playing the violin for a small group of children her age in the streets. times of when she was freer, happier and far too innocent for the truth of the world she lived in. she wished she could hear the notes that came with the memory, wished she could hear her own voice sing so proudly, sing in the way the others would often describe her voice to be. but she couldn't — it felt as though water filled her ears, , her lungs that she couldn't let a sound out—that she couldn't even so much as breathe.

a tear rolled down her cheek, and she suddenly found it hard to breathe. "tell me, what should i do? all i want is to play again — i want to be able to touch hearts again, i want to be able to reach someone through my songs again, bas," she forced out shakily. "but i can't. i want to, but i /can't/. i... i've come to hate it more than i loved it, and it scares me! what if... what if i won't be able to play again? what if i can never hear music the same way i used to again?" then wouldn't that mean she'd lost the only thing that shook her heart, that she deemed her true love? then, without music—without the very foundation of her soul, what would she be then? "i... i don't want that." her voice dropped into a low whisper. "but i'm scared, bas. so, so scared."

@♆ : sinna m 。 "and yet you still hold it," he noted, shrugging. no matter what sinna said, bastian already knew that a simple action such as holding the girl's hand gave her comfort. there were a lot of people around, after all – he didn't know if sinna was uncomfortable in crowds, but anyone would be overwhelmed by the amount of people wandering about. having someone next to her was no doubt comforting for the girl. it was comforting on bastian's end as well – he hated crowds. "say what you will, but i don't see you letting go any time soon."

her grip seemed to tighten in his hand, but he hardly noticed it. bastian didn't let go even as they were inside the safety of the capsule, noticing the way she bit her lips, as if nervous. her gaze seemed shifty, and it took a few moments before she finally fixed it onto the view outside – maybe they should have started with something else, he thought to himself. although sinna had been the one to choose the ferris wheel in the first place, it could be overwhelming for someone's first time. bastian had to remember that – there were lots of things sinna hadn't experienced. he had to be more careful.

silence seemed to fill the capsule after his question, but bastian didn't mind. if sinna didn't want to tell him, then that was fine. if she did, then he'd be patient. it was difficult to trust anyone when in a position like sinna's – and he knew that from experience. he let the silence fill the air as he gazed at the girl, awaiting some kind of response. no response was a response as well, but it seemed like she wanted to talk. like she needed to talk. like someone had to know of the suffering she had to endure all on her own.

and bastian would listen – why? because when he was in her position, he would have given anything for someone to just listen.

he was quiet as she spoke, letting her words register in his mind as a sense of nostalgia – if you could even call it that – overtook him. those days, spent trapped in that house, with no where to go and no one to turn to – bastian knew very well what drowning was like. he knew very well what it was like to drown even when there was something you were supposed to love right there by your side. because he'd loved his parents, hadn't he? even if it had been a lifetime ago, even if that love had turned into resentment, into hatred –

he'd loved them, once upon a time.

"i used to love mother and father," he began, his voice soft. he'd never talked about them with anyone after the incident had died down – too many painful memories. but... if this would help sinna realize that he was there for her, that he would be on her side even when it seemed like everyone in the world was against her – then so be it. "like you used to love music. you probably loved it more than i did them, actually, but... a long, long time ago, i used to love them."

he remembered the days when sinna would look so happy, so overjoyed, so passionate when she played – she reminded him so much of how he used to be. what right did they have? what right did anyone ever have to take away a young child's passion? a young child's feelings? a young child's outlook on the world?

bastian paused for a moment, his brows furrowing as he let the anger, the resentment, the despair well up in his chest – this was why he hated thinking about it. about them.

"but sometimes... people like them are selfish. they only think of what they want. they don't think of what's good for you. they don't care about you, even if they're supposed to – so i stopped. it became impossible to love them." he was talking too much, he realized. but he'd kept it in for a long, long time, and it was all beginning to spill out – maybe he was more human than he'd thought. "and it... felt like i was trapped. like i was drowning, even though we're underwater."

he needed to stop talking about himself – to backtrack, to detach. otherwise, he'd get hurt all over again, let himself simmer and burn in the memories that had been locked away in the crevices of his mind. "so no, it's not dumb. i think it's because you used to love it that it scares you so much," he murmured, cracking a small, bitter smile. "believe me, i know."

@♆ : bastian m 。 "i didn't tell you to hold my hand!" sinna retorted, but she made no efforts to let go of the lad's hand. her telling him to hold her hand and him actually holding her hand were two very different things, and that would be her defense until the time bastian finally let go. but until then, she'd hold his hand securely — feeling his presence directly helped fend off her fear of people quite well, and with the crowd that the two of them were currently in... she definitely needed it.

bastian's words puzzled her quite a bit. she didn't know his parents quite well — she was quite young when his parents had departed from the world, and even then, she wasn't aware of the details behind their deaths. if that was the case... then perhaps the two of them were more similar than she had initially thought. she wondered if that was what brought her to him — if that was what made him stick around her side longer than anyone else had. what did it feel to meet someone who probably understood what she felt? she didn't know — she had only realized that there was so much she didn't know about the man that had stayed by her side longer, far closer than anyone else had been.

that thought had her gripping his hand a little more tightly, though there was little strength her petite hand could possibly hold against his bigger one.

once the two of them were inside the capsule, her breath hitched in when it began moving. her heart pounded loudly, a sense of anxiety creeping into her heart as she realized that they were rising. she bit onto the soft flesh of her lower lip, before she moved her eyes toward the window — she would always hear that looking at the view would help ease up the anxiety, and it did, just a little, but it helped. she let out a soft, shaky breath as her shoulders eased, before his words reached her ears. "why were you crying earlier?" an automated response almost fell out of her lips out of instinct. 'nothing, i just remembered an old song,' she would always say whenever someone asked her why she was sad — she would always say something else, hide her emotions, because even when she was a musician, her parents thought that showing vulnerabilities was unnecessary. she only needed to be perfect, see?

nothing else mattered. she only needed to be perfect. any less than that was unacceptable.

her hands clenched by her sides, and she took a deep breath. moments had passed, and silence was the only thing that answered the older lad's question. how was she supposed to answer this one? how did one become honest, even? she wasn't used to this — she wasn't used to anyone asking, being concerned. but this was bas — she could trust him, couldn't she? he had been there when she had no one to go to, he had been there with waiting arms whenever she needed someone. her lips parted, yet it was only after another batch of silent moments that she had spoken, and even then, her voice was soft and barely audible. "they tried to make me play again," she muttered, keeping her eyes at the view below them, watching as they ascended even more. "and... like always, i couldn't."

she blinked, her eyes turning glassy. "it's dumb, i know, but... music scares me," she continued on. "i feel as if i'm drowning." what a tragedy it was, coming to fear the very thing that made her heart beat, the very thing she had once called her first and true love. but she couldn't help it — she couldn't hear any of the notes she played, couldn't force her voice to come out to sing without her feeling breathless. the notes felt as though they were water — and it was dumb, so dumb for a thalassan to feel like she was drowning when she lived under water, but that was the only thing she could feel. that was the only way she could describe what it felt like to try and play again.

@♆ : sinna m 。 "a butler?" he echoed, an amused smile playing at his lips. he'd never been told that before – it only proved to remind him that no matter how much sinna protested, a part of her was still like a little child. "why, because i got you cotton candy and i'm holding your hand so you don't get lost? i think the correct term you're looking for is babysitter," he teased, shaking his head.

luckily, the walk towards the ferris wheel wasn't too far away, and bastian did his best to steer the two of them away from the crowd. however, he still was barely able to hear sinna speak over all the ruckus – this was why he hated crowds. he stayed silent as she spoke quietly, his lips thinning the more he heard. that definitely sounded familiar; bastian himself had never been to the carnival while his parents were still alive. he hadn't even dared to dream, much less to ask. his grip on sinna's hand tightened ever so slightly – he wanted to talk to her, preferably in private. the ferris wheel was as good a place as any, and bastian silently guided them into the line, his face impassive as he gazed down at the girl. "i know what that's like," he murmured wistfully – somehow, sinna reminded him so much of how he used to be. "believe me when i say i understand."

it took a while, but eventually, the two of them reached the front of the line. bastian handed over two of the tickets he'd bought beforehand, helping sinna into one of the capsules before climbing into it himself. once they were settled, they began to rise – but bastian could hardly pay attention to any of that. he chose to focus on sinna; on the now quiet, somewhat withdrawn girl who was probably experiencing the sensation of being on a ferris wheel for the first time – all because her parents didn't love her enough to let her enjoy things, as she should have. he gazed at her silently for a few moments, before deciding to ask. he'd always respected her privacy, never asking her what had happened between her and her parents – but he wanted to know. he wanted to let her know that she wasn't alone in this, that he would be by her side as long as she needed, because he knew exactly what it was like. "why were you crying earlier?"

@♆ : bastian m 。 sinna wouldn't even deny that she was rather excited as she walked toward the ferris wheel, clutching bastian's hand securely in her own smaller one. taking another bite from her cotton candy, she hummed softly. "you know, you'd make a fine butler," she uttered, her eyes and focus solely on the delicacy in her hand. "but you're too annoying, so you might get fired instead," she continued, and bit onto the soft cotton candy once again. it melted so quickly in her tongue, and she couldn't help but smile wider at the taste.

she appreciated the fact that bastian walked more in tune to her pace by then — of course, she didn't want to trip while she was enjoying her sweets, and it helped distract her from the busy buzz of the crowd that surrounded them. she still couldn't avoid bumping into other people — either they weren't paying attention or they could care less about bumping into someone else. so she moved closer to bastian, and by the time the two of them reached the ferris wheel, she looked up at the lad, and moved her gaze to the ferris wheel. she pursed her lips and shook her head quietly.

"no," she answered, and she wondered if he'd heard it with how soft her voice was. "my... my parents never really allowed me to... go outside," she continued before she dropped her gaze to her sweets once more. the nail on her thumb rubbed against the stick of the cotton candy as she thought about the past. truly, her parents saw there was no need for her to go outside, play with the other children. what if her hands were injured? what if her hands got hurt? they were too anxious about her hurting her hands, so much so that it felt as though they cared more about her limbs rather than their daughter herself. "so i never really got to... go to places like this, you know?"

@♆ : sinna m 。 "are you insulting my name?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "bold choice for someone whose name is cinnamon and whose nickname is literally sin." he'd always found the younger girl's name... unique, to say the least. her parents had quite the interesting taste in names.

sinna seemed to be a bit distracted once bastian returned, and although he'd tried to catch whatever it was that she'd been eyeing, there was nothing of note by the time he looked in that direction. shrugging, bastian offered the blue cotton candy to the younger girl, taking a bite from the pink cotton candy and feeling it dissolve on his tongue. ah, too sweet – but he couldn't exactly complain; he'd bought it. his gaze followed hers as she looked through the expanse of the carnival, gazing at the large ferris wheel once sinna had set her sights on it. "your wish is my command," he hummed, offering her a mock bow before holding out his hand for the girl to take.

bastian began to make his way towards the ferris wheel with sinna in tow, making sure his pace wasn't as fast as it had been earlier. sometimes he forgot how long his legs were – and how much smaller people like sinna would have a difficult time trying to keep up. his pace was casual, almost like a leisurely stroll as he let the sights, sounds, and sensations of the carnival overwhelm him. really, there were too many people – but this was all for sinna's sake. "so," he began, recalling his first experience on a ferris wheel. it was almost exhilarating to have been up that high – it felt like there was no one that could reach you, no one that could have power over you from that height. "have you been on a ferris wheel before?"

@♆ : bastian m 。 "bastian sounds weird," sinna retorted. at this point, she was just spouting nonsense to protect what little pride she had left. "and bas sounds even weirder." not an actual point to be made, but she still put it out there just to plant it in his head. bastian was having way too much fun teasing her about nicknames she'd made when they were younger — but she too, was embarrassed about them. that didn't mean he could about it all the time though. the thought made her pout a little, eyebrows furrowed as she regretted the slip of the childhood nickname from her lips a lot. she only muttered a, "be fast, idiot," before she leaned against a pole, foot playing against the sand under her shoe.

she heard a childlike laughter, and she hesitantly raised her eyes from the sand to the source. they were a family of three — much like sinna and her own, she supposed — and the child was still a toddler. now, that wasn't what had taken her attention, no. it was the fact that his parents looked much happier than the laughing toddler, who kept asking for more sweets. the father was willing to buy, and despite being reluctant, the mother gave in. after all, how couldn't one give in when one saw an expression as pure as that child's? sinna couldn't help the soft smile that graced over her lips as she watched them walk away from her spot, heading toward the stands.

a sigh escaped her lips. that was what a normal family was supposed to look like, wasn't it?

when she heard someone speak near her, she quickly moved her attention from the family she was watching to her tall companion. "blue!" she said, immediately masking the brief loneliness that crept into her heart with a smile that allowed her eyes to curve into smaller versions of her smile, and she reached out to take the blue cotton candy from the other. she hummed a little in thought, as she plopped a piece of the cotton candy into . "since we don't have much time..." she started, and she looked around until her eyes landed on a large wheel, "let's go there!" she said, pointing toward it.

@♆ : sinna m 。 bastian definitely didn't miss the way sinna's grip tightened around his hand the moment he'd found her, a small smile playing at his lips. as much as she wanted to act mature, to be treated like she wasn't several years younger than him – it was hard to do so. she'd been a child for as long as he'd known her, and even though her parents stunted her emotional growth yet forced her to be more mature, she was still a child to him. he'd watched her – observed her for so long that it was apparent she needed someone by her side during times like these. clearly, bastian wasn't the best person – but was there anyone else that would be there for her the way he was?

"i have a name, in case you've forgotten," he snorted. "generally, if you call someone's name, they're bound to look– my name would have been enough, sin." he shook his head once more, chuckling softly. it was easy to be amused by this girl, so easily riled up by his meager teasing. he recalled all the times a younger sinna sweetly called him the odd nickname – mister reaper. sure, he'd taken to wearing all black even since his childhood, but it was still an odd nickname. amusing, even – especially considering her reaction right now. "whatever you say," he chuckled. part of him had a feeling it wouldn't be the last time he'd hear that childhood nickname.

"you'll miss me that much, huh?" he teased. "don't worry, i'll be back quickly. maybe we can play some of those carnival games once the crowd dies down, too." flashing the girl a smile, he quickly made his way over to the cotton candy stand – he didn't really want to leave sinna alone for too long, after all. there was a short line, and bastian found himself waiting for a few minutes before buying himself two of those cotton candy sticks – he wasn't really a fan of sweets, and he didn't know what flavors they were, but he wanted sinna to be able to choose from the two. speeding up his pace, bastian returned to the spot he'd left the girl, holding out the cotton candy in one hand.

"pink or blue?" he asked, tilting his head. "i think the crowd's died down a bit– do you want to walk around? i'll hold your hand so you won't get lost this time." a grin played at his lips as he teased the younger girl once more, humming softly.

@♆ : bastian m 。 see, sinna was a whole nineteen year old lady, but bastian still treated her as if she were younger than that. he wasn't even that old! he was just... what, 24? that wasn't that much older, but still... she didn't know why he was so adamant with treating her as a child. heck, he even doted on her more than her own parents did — and that line of thought sent another pang to her heart, which she quickly buried down. her parents, of all people, should be out of her mind right then. she didn't want to ruin this night for herself — and for bastian, as well. he was already going as far as to take her out of the waters just to cheer her up, and she wasn't going to let her parents destroy this brief peace she had.

her hold immediately tightened around bastian's hand the moment she felt his warm surround her hand, and she let herself be dragged away once more. at this point, if it weren't for bastian's height, she would have gotten swallowed up by that sea of humans even more. mentally thanking whoever had allowed the lad to be as tall as he currently was for first time in her life — and hopefully the last — she bit her lower lip. curse her height genes — if only she were a bit taller, say, grow ten more centimeters or so, then this wouldn't have happened. but alas, her genes declared that she would stay at her small height, and now she was suffering the consequences. her cheeks were puffed the whole time he led her to a more secluded area, but she didn't let go of his hand.

she huffed and cocked her head to face the other side, cheeks lightly flushed in embarrassment. "y—you wouldn't look if i didn't call you that! besides, that got you to notice me quickly, right? so i'm right." she moved her gaze from the crowd back up to the lad, eyes narrowed into an embarrassed glare. "and just so you know, i'm not going to call you that again! that's the last time!" that nickname was something she had used to call bastian, for the simple reason that he dressed like a grim reaper on the daily, without fail. and she was a child back then, alright? she was perfectly justified!

but him leaving her alone there... that thought made her nervous, but she didn't want to seem like a clingy child. he'd already seen her as a kid — she didn't want to fuel that thought further. "fine... just be fast, okay? i'll kick your if you take too long!"

@♆ : sinna m 。 a giant? well, she wasn't wrong – bastian was indeed taller than most people, especially girls like sinna that barely came up to his shoulders. he had never particularly liked or disliked his height, but it gave him an excuse to be playful around the younger girl. "that's true, but it certainly doesn't help that you're tiny." bastian couldn't help but notice the way she seemed to gravitate towards him, clearly intimidated by the crowd of people. amused, he shook his head – how could she claim she wasn't a child during moments like these? because to him, she was a child – and he was determined to let her enjoy herself, as a child should. "five years is more than you think it is, kid," he teased, raising an eyebrow at the girl.

was their age difference five years? he felt older, and she seemed so much younger than she actually was – too young to be going through all this.

a soft hum playing at his lips, bastian made his way towards the cotton candy stand with sinna in tow. the perks of being taller than most was that he could see quite well despite the heavy crowd. clearly, however, sinna didn't have that same advantage. bastian hadn't even noticed that her grip had slipped from his shirt until he heard the nickname he hadn't heard in years, the man immediately turning to find sinna trapped in the crowd of terrans and thalassans alike. clicking his tongue, bastian pushed past the throng of people, internally glad for his height as he reached out to take sinna's hand, immediately pulling her to a more secluded area.

as soon as they were settled, bastian raised an eyebrow, a smile playing at his lips. "mister reaper? you haven't grown out of that yet? and you say you're not a child," he teased, chuckling softly. bastian reached forward to ruffle sinna's hair gently. "how about you wait here? i'll get you something to eat myself – you could get swallowed up by the crowd out here, sin."

@♆ : bastian m 。 "it's not my fault you're just a giant," sinna couldn't help but say again childishly, but her hold onto the other's shirt tightened considerably. of course, she wouldn't want to get lost in a place such as this one — there were far too many people, far too many terrans for her comfort. the two of them stood out not in their eyes (no, they had worn contacts to attract less unwanted attention), but in their skin that glowed the slightest under the moonlit glow. there was nothing they could do with that, and so she tried to move closer to bastian, walking closely after his back. at the very least, she could use his height to shield herself from the stares — or just use his height to plow her way through the crowd. "and stop treating me like a kid! you're only five years older than me — five!" she said loudly, but she dropped her gaze down to the sand, and continued, "but since you're paying, i'll take some."

it wasn't as if sinna couldn't afford to buy herself some — it was just that food tasted better when it was free.

however, as the two of them maneuvered toward the cotton candy stand, the crowd around them thickened, causing her to lose her grip onto the other's shirt. eyes widening slightly in panic, she reached out, but she... couldn't reach! a bunch of people moved in front of her, and she was getting quite pushed over. why were there even a lot of people tonight? she clicked her tongue and waved a hand up as she struggled to swim past the bodies. "bas—mister reaper, wait!"

@♆ : sinna m 。 surprisingly, looking at sinna made his chest twinge in discomfort – maybe he did have emotions, after all. seeing her like this reminded him of those empty days, of watching and waiting for someone to come help him even when he knew that there was no one coming. and he'd been right. he wanted to be right about sinna, too – there was hope for her yet. he remembered the days when she was in love with music, when she let passion overcome all other obstacles standing in the way. he wanted to see her like that again – blooming, passionate, alive.

it was something that bastian would never see in himself, after all.

he hadn't realized how fast he'd been walking – but then again, sinna was much smaller than him. a soft laugh left his lips as he shook his head rather fondly at the younger girl. "that, or you're just too small to keep up with me. you better hold on – i could lose a tiny kid like you in this crowd." and a crowd it was, indeed – bastian didn't even know where to begin. maybe a snack? bastian tilted his head in the direction of the cotton candy stand, turning to look back at the girl. "want some? i'll pay."

@♆ : bastian m 。 despite the cheery and loud scenery that was waiting for her at their destination, she felt empty and almost numb.

of course, this wasn't the first time, nor was this rare. in her case, the days where she felt joy or anything relatively similar to that where even rarer. she was aware that this was an attempt of lifting her spirits up, or whatever bastian had wanted to accomplish with this matter. she didn't know whether arriving at the older man's doors in tears was something she regretted or not — but she didn't have anywhere else to go. bastian was the only one who had his doors open for her no matter what, and she couldn't help but come to him when there was no one else to reach out to.

maybe she'd give this a chance then. for bastian's efforts, she was going to try and cheer up — even if it might feel difficult at the moment, she would try. she tried her best to fall into step with the lad, to follow the other's pace, but— "shut up, you tall for nothing man," she mumbled under her breath, cheeks huffed as she hastened her speed, hands clenched into fists as she followed after the other's back. she reached out to grab the hems of his shirt once she was near him, an attempt to slow him down. "i don't have legs as long as yours! you're just too fast."

@♆ : sinna m 。 bastian hadn't been to the carnival in ages.

the last time he'd been here, it had felt like a lifetime ago – a simple field trip to the carnival, along with the other orphans he'd grown up with. although he'd been younger than sinna was now, little bastian had not understood the appeal of large, boisterous crowds and rambunctious, annoying children screaming their heads off. had he been younger – had he met someone that showed him the joys of being a child, then maybe. maybe he could have been different. maybe he could have been normal.

but sinna – she had that chance. she had a chance to grow, to flourish, to bloom. bastian wasn't about to let cruel adults take this young girl's future away from her, no – he was no guardian, no caretaker – but he couldn't bear to see sinna turn into someone like him. he wanted to see her smile, to watch her grow into the best person she could be. if her parents weren't going to guide her to the right path, then he would be the one to do it. he would show her simple, childlike joys.

"rather slow, aren't you?" bastian called out to her, a lopsided grin playing at his lips. "come on – we don't have all night, sin."