⤐ confessional.

@❛ yuta nakamoto Taeyeon sighs and holds her hands together and closed her eyes for a brief moment before opening it again, it's not easy to let go and she knew that the hard way. "It's not easy to let go, when you know that people you hurt were already dead, you cannot do anything. However, you can mourn them yet you are too late for them to forgive you. But you are right that I have to let go... I have to... to made peace with my inner demon inside me, it is stressing me out." She looked up and tries not to cry, "I will try to look upon the future, I will try to let go on what has been haunting me all this years."

@❛ taeyeon kim ᵉˡᵈᵉʳ His ears perking up at the sound of shoes clicking on the floor, pursing his lips and shutting his lids. The Priest didn't want to deal with another person, having listening to people problems everyday, it quickly drained him of all his emotions and energy. Opening one eyelid, glaring at his wrist watch, it was almost time to close the Church.

A Female was on the other side, Yuta had many ladies come through and spoke about their affairs or how they regret getting married or etc, but this lady, she was different. The Japanese's heart felt like it was being ripped out of his chest, being squeezed with. Regret. It was the toughest thing to get over, Yuta knew that feeling all too way. Taking a breathe in, keep it in, let it out.

He looked ahead, staring at the blank wood and opened his mouth. "The past will always come in to haunt us. There isn't a thing we can do about it." He spoke softly. "The best thing you can do for yourself is look towards the future." Folding his hands together, holding them onto his lap. "You have to let go of the past, you feel remorse, it's understandable. But if you truly wish to heal, you must stop thinking of the past, think of the future, think of what you can do better." Soaking his lower lip with his tongue, breathing out heavily. "It's not easy. Letting out of what you had done before... But you have changed, you're a new person now. You don't want to hurt anybody anymore. You're not that person no more. Let yourself be happy, let yourself be free. Stop chaining yourself up because of this mistake." Yuta finished with a light heart, a single teardrop flowing down his cheek.

@❛ yuta nakamoto Taeyeon walks inside the confessional for the first time in centuries, she had not been confessing since 1800s because of her dealing with other people's business just for her to live and get a lots of money. Taeyeon wears a black dress and a black shawl to cover up her face as she walks inside the confessional before sitting on a chair while the priest is listening behind the wooden plank beside her.

"It has been many years since I confessed my sins, I have been living within the shadows of other people just because I want to earn money for myself. It was hard hiding myself from the public because of my privacy, I killed many bad people, because I thought it is a good thing to kill. But when I realized that those bad people includes children, younger people, I stopped. I don't know who to talk to with this, it has been many years ago... however it bugged me and it haunts me today. What should I do?" Taeyeon confessed nonchalantly as she still trying not to show her expression of regret and shame.

@❛ jacob kiszka "you never know." picking at the skin on his fingers, ceasing the tapping onto the floor, sighing softly as he glanced at door in front of him, tilting his head to the side until he heard a tiny 'pop'. lowering his head, a soft chuckle escaping his lips at Jacob's comments.

fooling around was always easy for the priest, he loved messing with people, yuta simply loved the thrill of what would happen afterwards.. especially with his favorite idiot. "of course, of course. speak whatever on your mind." eyes darting over to his cross, his breath becoming heavy for a moment, tearing his eyes away from the necklace. "but, let me confess to you first." yuta grinned, cupping his cheek gently. "I deeply, miss you having your way with me." the smirk spreading across his face. "the way you wrap your hands around my neck, whispering in my ear about how sinful i am, pouncing yourself into me.." the priest dreamily sighed, laughing softly. "Ah. I apologize, you should've been the one to confess. My bad, my bad."

@❛ changmin shim ʰⁱᵍʰ ᶜᵒᵘⁿˢᵉˡˡᵒʳ a pause of deafening silence lingers on as the man became lost amidst his own internal musings, each one idea more vile than the last which rouse upon his lips a rather serpentine smile. yet the carnal nature of such daydreams were perhaps too offensive for the father’s own conscience to allow. thus he opts to mystery, a knowing sigh escaping as he simply responds, “nothing you would agree to.”

“oh, please,” john soon breaks out in a fit of dubious chuckles, rather taken aback by how easily the other could leap to assumptions and worrisome frenzy. then again, their past had always been riddled with the younger’s wicked misadventures from the very start. “i would never. not with you still inside, at the least. so you’ve no reason to be such a wet blanket.”

the mere concept of hierarchy and authority alone had long been one which puzzled men such as john himself. massive ego and shameless pride reject the mere thought of another being above his own. “quite right you are.” finally after much concentration, channeling changmin’s energetic rage unto his soul and filtering it through his mind, the of the cigarette still betwixt gentle fingers drew from thin air a small flame; the gift which was granted to him when he turned.

taking a long, calculated drag, he savors every last taste of ash as the confessional fills with hazy clouds of smoke. “if only you’d give the orders.. i tire of slaying the same damned shaggy lycan beasts. i need more.”

@❛ johnny seo “may i ask,” he implores the other, lifting his hand from his side as an attempt to cover the smug curl of his smirk despite the veil between them. “if you are so jealous of our heavenly father for me being the one to kneel before him as all of his creations do, what is it that you would like to alleviate your jealousy?” his amusement is swiftly stunted by his return to professionalism, swiftly admonishing his previously playful behavior. “although i dare only kneel to our lord, as he is our only king.”

he raises his brows in concern, wanting to rise from his seated position to instead speak directly to the other and ensure he doesn’t carelessly burn down the church changmin has worked tirelessly to construct and organize. “if you were within the congregation of the church, i would allow you to smoke in his domain; however, i have reason to suspect you wish to burn it down.”

his demeanor suddenly turns cruel as anger pulsates through his entire being upon hearing his ward’s comments. “you have no idea...” he whispers in a strained voice, kneeling over himself as he balls his hands into fists in an effort to not lose himself over establishing his hierarchy over his ward. “it was no selfish ambition on my part—it was instead my own sire’s. he and the elders like him deserve their rightful place in hell.”

( ) hhhh sorry this is bad i might rewrite it

@❛ changmin shim ʰⁱᵍʰ ᶜᵒᵘⁿˢᵉˡˡᵒʳ “and sin we shall, my good man!” john exclaims in his exuberance with only the cloth of the curtain to muffle his echo which surely would reverberate unto the tight walls surrounding them. “for if we sinners should ever cease, must god be plagued by eternal monotony.” hearty laughter followed thereafter in strong billows that wash over like tides beneath the heavy moon until in a blink, it withered away. sat before the mercy of god’s own humble pupil, the beautiful creature which so craved for absolution, john took pleasure with the company indeed.

slipping a single cigarette from it’s silver plated box does it then linger between his fingers, absorbing every tender small touch and wafting into the humid air an unmistakably minty cool scent of death. “i confess.. the image of my own maker on his knees before another, much less tangible being is truly something to incite envy.” in slow increments does his gaze turn towards the immortal beside him, piercing as sharp as daggers through the thick veil of darkness that cut between them. if he so much as squinted, he swore he could steal a glimpse of the undoubted smile curled upon the counsellor’s lips.

what could ever so trouble a man delivered from his mortality, gifted with the strength and will to live amongst the creations of the heavens as a god in his very own right? such a matter had always troubled john from the very start of his acquaintance with his sire. tales as old as time and vows of immeasurable faith surely spread from the mouth of shim himself, but why even bother? in his dark eyes john saw only fear with very little conviction for self. my, what a waste.

“say, you wouldn’t happen to have a light?” a hand raises high above as the cigarette still dormant between his fingertips demands attention, luring his lips to finally taste the first of release upon his lips just like the velvet allure of his voice softening for his abiding master. “i suppose god won’t have a care if i smoke in the honor of his everlasting power. just as he does not have a care to smite you, his loving servant, who has forever claimed my body and soul for selfish ambition.”

@❛ johnny seo as changmin awoke to begin his clerical duties, the hazy red sunset aroused the memories of tens of centuries ago having been scarcely addressed in his thousand years of his second life; he can still hear the brothers-in-arms convulsing in their death throes. their bodies lay slaughtered, limbs severed into pieces, providing stark contrast to the crimson crucifixes emblazoned proudly across their chests. as changmin's soul began sinking into the depths of hell alongside all of his brethren, betrayed they spat at the clergy of the church. from thereon, changmin fails to remember anything of substance, leaving only a sinking feeling of horror for him to escape hell at any cost.

with heavy urgency, changmin dresses himself before he clamors to kneel beneath the altar. "dear god," he breathes into his clasped palms. "please, dear lord, please do not come back yet--i have much left to do in my immortality until i can be absolved of my sins. i have never strayed from you in my second life, so please--"

his moment of groveling before the grand crucifix in the chapel is cut short. he immediately rises from his knees at the sound of a soul entering the chapel, and changmin moves hurriedly to occupy his space of the confession booth accordingly. eager to help another child of god, he takes a moment to collect his thoughts, but he can't help but hide the smile spreading across his lips upon recognizing the voice of the other vampire.

"my dear brother under god," changmin begins, making a poor attempt of hiding the smile in his voice. "with the sky under its current state, he may already have descended, leaving only us filthy sinners here to have at each other as the strongest please."

@❛ changmin shim ʰⁱᵍʰ ᶜᵒᵘⁿˢᵉˡˡᵒʳ haunted were they, those who harbored the age old question of the existence of higher powers above. such trifles had never before encumbered men of little faith much like john. yet there was simply no helping but to ponder as the years gone by since he was endowed with eternal youth. now there was simply no rebuttal; god is real. he only shows his true figure within the reflection of a silver dagger each time its wielder unsheathes to claim another soul. god is pain, god is death, and all things obscene.

thus did john find himself in the house of the ever wrathful god, reaching out a hand as it wavered upon a single flickering candle flame. the warmth entangled itself all around him and demanded his presence. in that moment he could not betray the allure as thoughts linger on a time long ago when he was reborn amidst the fire and blood of christ’s most curious disciple. alas the creature could no longer be kept at the mercy of the burning flame and returned to his truer master, the high counsellor changmin.

once stepping into the confessional booth and shutting the curtains to a smooth close, silence endures. a smile curled along plush rosy lips until at last the crisp sigh of contentment beckoned forth discourse. “your god is a revelation, my dear.” even when veiled by the shadows and humility of their little hideaway does john command his presence be heeded as if to domineer in a playful disobedience towards his sire. each word dripped off the edge of his tongue with a vintage drawl as rich as aged wine, carrying on as it were.

“i should like one day to watch him descend from the heavens and burn humanity with a kiss of indignation.”

@❛ chaeyoung park in the lull of hours between clerical duties, changmin busies himself in the area of the church dedicated to eduating the youth junctly connected to the confession room, as it was his period to be servicing the confession booth for any of god's children to confess their deepest thoughts and sins unto the lord. it is believed confessing one's sins is the first step in being free from retribution. during the construction of the latter portions of the church in the 1700s, changmin had asked for the layout to be thus; in a world ever more full of sin by the common people, he wished for the children to become familiar with the confession room so as for if they are to escape the many abuses they'd suffer within the home, changmin's deepest hope is that they would come to the church for guidance instead of risking their lives otherwise.

as he snips away the wilted stargazer lilies beneath jesus christ's figure, collecting the blemished petals onto his palm, he finds his thoughts linger on the thought of love--as he knew of it, the union between two souls. he does not recall experiencing any moment of love at any period of his second life. his hand falters as he holds the lily petals over the trash, trying to remember his first and last love of when he was still made in god's image. he still has the memory of love's warmth, the sunbeams emanating from his lover's smile, and the house they shared beside the coast. he wants to say his lover's name, yet his tongue fails him. "i've forgotten..." he whispers, watching through his clouded eyes as the lily petals fall between his fingers.

in the otherwise empty chapel, changmin registers the sound of someone entering through its heavy doors and proceed to close themself in the confession room. he hurriedly pieces himself together, crossing himself with a hushed plea, 'please forgive me,' to the figure of the crucified christ before he moves hurriedly to occupy his according space of the confession room. through the thick mesh of the film separating them, he's able to make out a figure of the person opposite to him. "my deepest apologies for the wait." he says. "dear child of god, what struggles ail you?"

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@❛ yuta nakamoto “Why wouldn’t I?” be shoots back, though his golden eyes remain focused on the door in front of him, brows knitted together. “I don’t break a routine.” the vampire was acutely aware of the sound of Yuta’s foot tapping on the floor, but more than that, he could hear the rush of his blood through his veins, like violent rapids to satiate his never-relenting thirst. his lids close for a moment, fangs meeting and overlapping his bottom row of teeth.

“My god is far from merciful,” he grumbles, fists tightening by his sides. he knew what the priest was doing, what he always did, but he didn’t come to confession for /that/. his words like hellfire at Jacob’s boots. “I’m not here to play your little games, Yuta. I want to confess. Nothing /more/.” the last word is emphasized, recalling their last session. he could still see the embeds in the wooden door of the confessional, reminiscent of how he’d slammed the human against it in the fervent scouring of carnal pleasure, and how Yuta’s fingers had clawed at the door to relieve the pressure of the starving beast at his back, ravaging and ruthless.

@❛ changmin shim ʰⁱᵍʰ ᶜᵒᵘⁿˢᵉˡˡᵒʳ love. the word was beautiful, and so was the feeling as most would say. it wasn't a throwaway emotion, something to invoke on a whim. nor, was it transitory like lust, or something to regret like anger. love permeates every action, influences every thought, guide every deed, and leads to an inner peace not attainable in any other way. it is the light in every dark night, shining brightly into each recess of the mind healing, igniting passions that would otherwise have died. love leads the way to who we were made and born to be, as people who prize peace, dignity, and honor, people who find solutions that work for the many instead of the few. love is what we must hold for one another, especially when tensions are high, for it is what keeps us together.

however, no one ever speaks upon the ugliness of it. the ugly truth, as roseanne once said. no one ever mentions the lies, the betrayal, thoughtlessness, uncaring attitudes and careless gossip that spreads as quick as germs do. and what hurts chaeyoung the most is, losing the one she once thought would've last. yet again, nothing good ever lasts forever but only the memories that haunts her till this day.

and so, came in chaeyoung as she hesitantly entered the chapel, heels clicking against the surface of the floor as she opened the door to the confessional room, before taking a seat in the chair.

@❛ jacob kiszka Listening to the lady, his lashes fluttering against his cheekbones. Having to listen to people everyday was a deep annoyance, if he wasn't a priest he'll keep each other of these sinners away from him and keep on minding his own business. Sighing softly to not disturbed the lady who kept on ranting, talking about how she had an affair with her boss and regretting cheating on her husband.

Opening to his mouth when the lady had began to ask him what she should do, closing it when Yuta heard a low growl and the lady whimpering in fear, a smirk growing on his face as he knew who had just arrival into his church, storming and interrupting his session. the Japanese male leaned back in his chair, his lips with excitement and his first two buttons, pulling the cross that hang around his neck off and setting it off to the side.

"It's lovely to see you again. I thought you wouldn't come this time." Yuta chuckled softly, clicking his tongue and tapping his shoe against the cremate floors. he wanted nothing more but to pissed off the other, making him feel even more rage. "You're lucky that god is a merciful, if it was me..." an wicked smile appearing on his face. "I'll let you burn like the bastard you are." Crinkling his eyes as he laughed loudly, shaking his head. "Kidding."

@❛ yuta nakamoto silent footsteps carry the immortal over the threshold of the chapel, his eyes scanning the barren pews. the cliche of vampires bursting into flames as they step foot on hallowed ground replays in his mind. if only he could’ve been so lucky.

very few things brought him any sort of comfort anymore; as decades turned into centuries, he found himself less and less amused by things that once held meaning, less attentive to anything but his duties as a Death Dealer. his faith remained strong, however. the idea of a god, albeit one that he was no doubt never going to come face to face with, brought him a bitter comfort. he knew his parents were with their maker, and his sister. his twin. he prayed for his younger brother, Sam, who had been a bit of a wild child towards his later years, every single day, in hopes that god might hear the begs of a sinner and allow his brother to be at peace with him in heaven.

the church was nearly empty, as to be expected, except for the confessional, which seemed to be occupied. the vampire grits his teeth, his patience practically nonexistent already. he always came ‘round to confess his sins on one particular night a week, and he only had a small window of time to do so. yanking open the door to see a young woman seated in what was supposed to be his seat, his brows furrow. “Time’s up.” his voice is low, but thick with danger. “Get out.” it was always interesting to see just how fast a mortal could run if they were startled, as she scrambled for her things and was sprinting to the double doors of the entrance as fast as she could. he didn’t care, he never cared. sliding into the seat, he looks straight ahead, hand coming up to bless himself with the cross on his shoulders and forehead. he was already well aware that the priest on the other side was familiar with him, and his nature. he hid nothing from god, and made certain the father was well aware that to speak a word of anything that took place in the confessional would result in the most painful of severances of his skull from his spine. Jacob closes his eyes, envisioning the Holy Ghost waiting for his confession.

“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned in abundance this week. My very existence is but an outlet for sinful things.”