۶ৎ nightclub

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@hyunjin turning down a dance had never been followed by the feeling of regret before.
my lips latch onto the end of my straw as i take a sip of alcohol, gulping the pang of guilt down my throat with hope it will wash away. the sensation surely migrates, only arriving as far as the centre of my chest where its presence lodges and grows.
'a new friend', my mind pulls me away from the uncomfortable feeling to fixate on your words instead. i had very few friends myself, the majority of whom i met when i was in school and more open to new connections. fame had long been renowned to change a person, and its effect had surely worn off on me. as is proven by my hesitance as i stand lamely by the bar, watching you move into the crowd. i continue to watch on as you match the current of moving bodies, flowing mostly in time with the bass i can feel drumming beneath the flats of my feet.
i take another sip of my drink, followed by another until it is all gone, but the guilt refuses to drift any further from where it's stuck. a sigh leaves my lips as my eyes close for a second and i resign to the possibility of embarrassing myself again. placing my empty glass on the counter, i pinch at the bridge of my nose before my gaze switches back to the dance floor, eyes sorting through unfamiliar faces until i find yours, sharp and pretty features contrasting against the rest of the crowd's. i can't bring my hips to sway, yet i attempt to migrate into the dancing that soon swarms and surrounds me.
reaching you from behind again, i feel immediate relief. my hands return to your waist where they slip neatly along the prominent bone that's there, pulling you backwards into my chest as i speak up over the volume of booming club classics.
what if i had a change of heart, would you have me back? you look like you're having too much fun -

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@hyunjin barely able to hear your voice over the blaring music, i lean in once again, this time so that your lips brush the shell of my ear. the lightness of your breath sends a pleasant shiver along my skin, coursing beneath the sleeves of my jacket.
comprehending your words, they send me looking towards the dance floor then back at you. laughter blurts out from my mouth before long as my head shakes in immediate refusal.
no, no, i came here to watch you dance and have a drink or two in a show of support. i don't feel like making a fool of myself in public tonight, i embarrass myself enough on my own time -
i turn towards the bartender and order myself a simple vodka soda, enough to keep my mouth entertained sipping on while i plan on resuming my position at the sidelines of the club.
you look good, hyunjin, go pick someone up and enjoy yourself. i'm happy watching on, just give me a shout if you need anything.
my left hand reaches past your hip, travelling further down to land an encouraging pat on your behind as my right hand becomes occupied with a chilled glass of alcohol, handed off to me from behind the bar. taking a first sip, i grin at you shortly afterwards.
go, let loose.

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@hyunjin i never gravitated towards the club. even after graduating high school, life swiftly directed me into a full time career in the public eye over spending late nights out with friends, making fools of one another along the way home; lasting memories.
i can't deny, part of me often wonders if i missed out on a foundational moment in most young people's lives. am i still young enough to go out and make the most of the night?

as i sit in a taxi on the way to a foreign address, i don't have much time left to ponder the question - if any to begin with.
- on my way!
i receive your brief message, staring at the words printed in front of me for a moment before locking my screen again without a response. my brows furrow for a split second while i pinch at the bridge of my nose. this night out i had agreed to over a coincidental coffee date was truly about to become a reality. i was about to meet an acquaintance in a dimly lit place i was unfamiliar with, in another country of all places. it might just get me in to trouble - i might just be willing enough to risk it.

slipping out from the back of my taxi and passing the bouncer with equal ease, i slide into the club without a hitch. only, the moment i mistakenly step towards the dance floor, there are moving bodies all around me, swirling like the tide, inviting me in to join them. i laugh them off rather awkwardly, shuffling across the sticky floors dirtied with spilled alcohol and soda before i reach your familiar figure from behind, hands laying over both your hips as i arch over your shoulder to greet you.
hyunjin, you're already drinking?

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