@โงห j. jaewon without even her noticing, younjung found herself smiled at jaewon’s words and response. he always tried to soothe and ease her out, just like he used to, and he never failed at that. she nodded her head, acknowledging all of the memories he mentioned. part of her didn’t want to relive those moments because she knew she would lose it all in the end, but jaewon looked a little excited when talking about those and something in her stomach flipped and fluttered. heck, does she even still have feelings for him?
younjung mentally took a grip of herself as she stood up with him, walking around the table to finally stroll across the school towards the cafetaria. her hand clenching on the sling of her bag across her body as she managed to walk next to jaewon. she felt like there was an invisible and indescribable tension between them–although maybe it could only be on her part and /her heart/–and clinging onto her bag was the only thing she could do keep herself grounded.
the girl turned her head away from jaewon as they walked. her gaze lingered somewhere around the field and the corridor—just never on jaewon. it wasn’t like she didn’t want to see him, but she just felt it would feel overwhelming for her to look at him this closely. “i wonder if they still have the kimbap here.. it was my favourite,” she said to herself, reminiscing to herself about the history of the kimbap that was initially bought by jaewon for her when she wasn’t feeling well and didn’t feel like going to lunch. jaewon brought the kimbap right to their class and her desk and ever since that time, that kimbap was her favourite ever. she wondered if the guy even remembered about that. because it was so trivial, yet it meant a lot for younjung that time.
soon after, they turned to the cafetaria that still took place at the exact spot it was before, yet a lot has changed. it has new color theme. it used to be simple white and grey with black wooden tables and chairs. but now all the tables and chairs have changed into new ones, still black but with a lighter tone and mostly made by stainless.
“woah, they really changed,” younjung inhaled a small gasp as suddenly all of her uneasiness resided and was replaced by more excitement. she glanced at jaewon, flashing a smile at him and waved a little. “come on!” she invited him as she walked towards the counter. the first thing that came acrossed her mind was to check the menu and, of course, to see if the cafetaria ahjumma was still working there. the ahjumma was a very kind person to younjung. she often gave younjung more portions of lunch that she wasn’t supposed to have.
“kim ahjumma?!” younjung almost yelled in excitement as she saw the familiar figure. the old woman–now was obviously about ten years older than the last time younjung saw her–turned around from her stuff and faced younjung. her expression and excitement really mirrored what younjung had on her face. she definitely still recognized her and was excited to see her.
“go younjung? aigoo– it’s been a long time!” kim ahjumma clasped her hands in excitement and younjung greeted her back with a bow, smiling widely. “how are you?” ahjumma continued as she tilted her head to finally see jaewon’s presence and she let another loud enthusiastic gasp. “oh, jaewon is here too? are you both finally getting married? or are you married already? aigoo– how dare you didn’t invite me! tell me, tell me, how are you two?”
younjung’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped a little at kim ahjumma’s questions which she never expected to come. for a moment, her brain froze.
@โงห g. younjung .
jaewon steal a quick glance at the female next to him. her beautiful features still the same — her captivating eyes and her lips — jaewon quick shakes his thoughts away. when she mentioned believed in him, his heart ache as he exhales softly. "thank you, youn. you probably don't know how much that means to me. back then i was foolish — you were there all the time, cheering me on. it's just me, who took that as granted." his lips twitch into a faint smile.
jaewon knows he will regret it especially after he sees her again and he did. if only he could hold her in his arms again — he wouldn't let her go anymore, but this time was hard. he knows how strong she is even without him around and it aches jaewon even more. jaewon think she deserves better — not ungrateful man like him.
when she mentioned about her job, jaewon gently shaking his head, not in disappointment but in quiet admiration. " you've been doing so much, those jobs are not a small feat. I'm impressed with the way you handle this things even when it's tough for you. " he hesitate sensing her uneasiness, but he added, "whatever you're doing now is nothing to feel less about, younjung. it's honest work, and i applauds you for being strong."
he couldn't help but to chuckle at her remarks about her old house. "i remember back then , i used to sprawl out on the floor with the assignments everywhere. your place always felt like a safe haven, no matter what. “and do you remember how we used to grab buldak ramyeon from that convenience store down the street after we finished studying? no matter how late it was, we always found time for that.” he laughed quietly at the thought before biting his lip, a flicker of self-consciousness flashing across his face. “uh, I mean... well. the memories were great. and they still are.."
there was something endearing about the way she spoke, the subtle hopefulness in her suggestion. how could he possibly say no to her? a small, genuine smile graced his lips as he leaned forward slightly. “oh i haven’t had a chance to explore it yet, but now you’ve got me curious. I think I’d like to see what’s changed since we were here.”
he stood slowly, motioning for her to lead the way, his gaze never straying far from her. “well, let’s take a look,” he said, his voice steady but laced with unspoken meaning. “I think I’d like to see this place again—with you.”
@โงห j. jaewon he sounded exactly the way he used too; like the way his deep and low voice always soothed younjung out of her worries and anxieties back then. she never knew hearing her name being called in that voice again could bring her thousands of bittersweet memories back. meanwhile she didn't even have the strength to say his name out loud.
younjung didn't realise that she somehow had been holding her breathe ever since jaewon's presence. it was only when her lips broke into a fond smile and let out a short relief laugh at his answer that she felt how much she was keeping the oxygen out of her lungs and how much her heart has been clenching and aching inside her chest.
"that's really great. i always knew you would make it," she said with the same supportive smile she always gave him. she recalled how much she adored the man for always trying to catch his dream—if she couldn't say it almost looked like an obsession. she knew he was so focused on it that when it eventually made them drifted apart and made him disappeared completely from her life, she never actually showed that it affected her so much. she just swallowed all down and let it be.
could it be because he was that important to her that she excused everything he did? or could it be because she was fast to got over it entirely and has accepted the fact that she would never have anyone staying in her life? or perhaps it's a little bit of everything—she couldn't decide.
"it's just been the same for me. i graduated and... got a small job at the hotel. i've been working there since," she answered a little hesitantly, a little conscious of how her job might look nothing compare to his. "and doing part time for everything else, i guess. i even still living in the same house too though," she added with a small nod as if prompting him to remember that he quite often visited her house too whenever they tried to do homeworks and assignments together.
noticing how he hasn't moved an inch from his spot and thinking he might just be in a rush for not doing that, a little part of younjung pushed herself to initiate a move. it might even be too brave for her liking but that little part inside her has been longing for him for too long. this also might be the only chance they could meet again; she couldn't help it. "have you... looked around? i heard they changed the cafetaria menu and everything," she said while unconsciously clenching her fists tightly on the table, anxious of what she might get the answer for her question. "do you... wanna take a look?" she hesitantly yet finally said it. it wasn't even a big move maybe for everyone else. but it felt like it to her; as if she was finally asking for him to stay even just a little bit longer for her.
jaewon could feel his heart racing, pounding hard against his ribcage as he watched her reaction. he never expected to see her again, especially not here, where it all started. the way she looked at him with those bewildered eyes made jaewon’s heart ache even more. even now, she was as beautiful and stunning as he remembered. for a split second, he felt like he was seventeen again—foolish and young, wanting nothing more than to reach out for her.
but—the years that had passed reminded him of the silence, the missed chances, and the countless times he thought of her but let the moment slip away from his fingers. he swallowed hard, attempting to steady his breath and voice. "yeah, it's me. still alive, somehow. i'm thankful you still remember me," he said, a faint and hesitant smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "never thought i'd run into you here, younjung."
jaewon took a slow breath, feeling the question settle over him. how could he begin to explain everything he'd gone through — the choices, the regret and the years he'd spent in silence. how is his life now? he wondered about it himself. how does it feels to have neglected her presence when she is always there to support him?
he remembered her patience, the way she'd quietly cheered him on even when his dream seemed far-fetched, the way she believed in him when he doubted himself, and yet — he distancing himself from her. let her slip away from his life as if she's never been there.
and how does it feel when the situation just won't let you do what you wanted? his chest tightened with the weight of everything he'd been forced to leave behind to chase his dream, as an airforce soldier. life had pushed him in ways he hadn't expected, shaping him into someone he hardly recognised — someone who had traded everything he loved for ambitions that never filled the emptiness after her absence.
"life’s been... a lot," he admitted, shrugging as he met her doe eyes again. "the air force and training keep me busy, keep me moving. finally managed to get that far." a slight chuckle escaped him, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. "guess i kept chasing the sky, just like back then."
jaewon watched her face, his gaze softening as he studied every detail, wondering if she still felt even a little bit of what he did. "and you? how’s life?"
@โงห j. jaewon she was too immersed in the feeling of nostalgia, reminiscing all the old moments in the school that younjung was snapped out of it when she heard a voice greeted her. she turned her head towards the source and someone she never expected to see, appeared there right in front of her eyes.
the male before her was the heartthrob of the school. he was a handsome kid with a lot of girls admiring him in secret. so tall, so attractive and so good looking. jeon jaewon now still looked like that in younjung's eyes. her smile slowly fell and dropped a little agape at the sight of him. not only because of seeing how jaewon looked a lot more matured yet still was very extraordinarily good looking, but also because she exactly knew what this man had done to her.
"h-hey..?" younjung choked out a reply. "you.. i remember you." that wasn't exactly what younjung planned to say. of course, she remembered him. more than just remember, if she could say. they spent a lot of time together in high school. they had met and got close just around her sister's departure and left her to live all alone in her teenage age. she had depended a lot on him; as if she has founded another solace, another person to lean on. she acknowledged that he was her first love and the teenage younjung thought he was everything for her, but only until he disappeared and left another big void that could never be filled inside her heart. he also had took a part of reasons why the now younjung could never trust anyone—because even someone as nice as jaewon back then could also leave her completely alone too.
younjung felt like little needles just stabbed so deeply into her heart just by remembering the moments she had with jaewon. although at the same time—probably her inner child was taking over—within a brief moment, she also wanted to relive all the greatest moments she had with jaewon. "what brings you here?" she finally asked again, her gaze followed every little moves that jaewon made as if she couldn't get enough of looking at him. "how's life?"
@โงห g. younjung if it weren't for some things he'd left behind a few years back, there's no way jaewon would be here right now. it's his high school—the place where it all started. even in his teenage days, he was already captivated by aircraft. that's why he's doing everything he can to qualify as an army pilot now. as he approaches the office, a mix of emotions swells within him. everything has changed since he last walked these halls. the surroundings, the atmosphere, the walls—all of it reminds him of something, and he realizes he was lost in thought when his name is called by the principal himself.
"mr. jeon, here’s everything from back then. i never expected you’d come to retrieve this, but i kept it for you," the principal says, his words making jaewon feel grateful as he bows respectfully. "could i have a look around before i go, principal? i’d like to see the place," jaewon asks. the principal smiles and nods. "after all, it's your school, your second home. go ahead, take a look around and relive those memories." jaewon chuckles softly at the principal's words.
stepping out of the office, jaewon takes a deep breath, his gaze scanning the area. he carefully makes his way around, passing by his old classroom before stopping to watch the students focused on their lessons. a small smile crosses his lips as he recalls a certain someone—a girl who managed to melt his cold, distant heart. but just as quickly, his smile fades. they used to be close... well, not exactly. they were both stubborn, in denial of their feelings. even so, she was his first kiss, and jaewon thinks that's more than enough. just a silly kid with his silly thoughts.
he sighs softly, feeling a bit defeated at the thought of her. why did loving her feel so difficult, when they could have just confessed to each other? why was it so hard back then? he regrets making her feel the way he did, hurting her when he didn't mean to. it was hard for him too, but how could he ever tell her that? was he too focused on building his career, that he neglected her feelings and acted cold? jaewon regrets it, but he knows now that they both need to move on.
continuing his walk, jaewon sighs deeply and heads toward the field. he doesn't notice the girl sitting on the benches until he spots her at last. his heart starts racing. she’s smiling, but unfortunately, that smile isn't for him anymore, and it makes his heart clench.
โ go younjung โ
even the name is beautiful. his throat feels tight. he stands frozen for a moment before taking a deep breath. she's still so beautiful, breathtaking even. his eyes grow misty, but he quickly blinks it away, clears his throat, and gathers the courage to approach her, looking at her with longing in his eyes.
@โงห j. jaewon It was a pretty sunny day and Younjung just stepped out of a house with big yard and wooden fence. It was her day off today, and as she hasn't been getting any modelling or photoshoot offer for a while, she always tried to make extra money by doing anything she could do.
This day was a little different though. She wasn't doing a job she actually applied for, but she was only doing someones a favour with a little extra bonus for what she do. She looked the small box of a package wrapped around her slender fingers, fumbling with it a little as her curiosity wonder about what might be inside it as she walked on the side of the street. She wasn't usually a delivery girl but this time her friendly ahjumma next door asked her to deliver this package to her son that was working at Haepung High School. The old woman offered her some pocket money and extra lunch and since they have been neighbours since forever, Younjung really couldn't say no to her. Besides, she's really familiar around the school anyway. And also, obviously, she really couldn't say no to extra money.
It only took her 7 minutes walk before she finally arrived at the school, following the same route she always took everyday to work. But she hasn't been stepping her feet into the school area anymore since... many years ago. She greeted the school's security officer at his post—who turned out was still the same man that she knew when she was still studying, only got a lot older—and had a little chit chat to explain that she was here to deliver a package to someone in the administration division. The old security man told her she could just leave the package there and he would hand it over to the person. Younjung bowed deeply and thanked him a lot because that made it a lot of easier for her.
"Don't you want to come in and look around for a bit, though?" the man asked when he caught Younjung was staring off at the school building behind the fence. The girl turned her head to the old man with a little surprise, yet excitement beaming off her eyes. "Can I?!" she asked, making sure with the security man. The man nodded, talking about how he knew Younjung wouldn't make any trouble in the school and how she might meet some of her old teachers while looking around. It probably was the peaked of her excitement that day and the next thing she knew she was already strolling through the corridor, looking at the school that felt familiar, yet a lot also has changed and improved for the better.
She noticed how the wall colours has changed. There were some rooms that has changed their functions. The rings at the out basketball field seemed just very recently changed into a new one. Though, most of them still feels the same to her. She looked up to see the windows of her old classrooms on the upper floor, and it still looked exactly the same. The whole school looked almost empty as it was still at school hour so all the students were probably busy studying in their respective rooms. Younjung walked up across the field, going towards some sets of seemingly new benches and tables under a huge tree that probably was used for the students to hang out. It kind of looked different but it was still the very same old tree she also spent a lot of time reading her books back then, only without the benches. She sat herself on one of the benches, putting her mini sling bag on the table then clasping her hands on top of it. Unconsciously, her lips formed into a soft smile while gazing around, remembering all the things she had went through and done in this school. High school really left a bittersweet feeling for her.
